The Servant's Quarters

Signs of the times, but I still find them surprising and a bit unsettling.

Yesterday, when I gave blood at the Red Cross, they asked me a brand new question. Actually, it was a new version of an old question -

"What gender were you when you were born?"

I stared at the nurse blankly for a few seconds. I didn't know what to say. She finally prompted me, "Male...?" Yes, I said. I was born a male. And as near as I can tell, it's been a lifelong habit.

Also, Isaac had a doctor's appointment yesterday. Since it's been a long time since his last visit and he's at a different stage of life now, he had to answer a ton of questions. He shared one of them with me later that evening at church -

"Are you attracted to boys, girls, or both?"

Political correctness grows with no end in sight.

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Just didn't have a title today. Guess I'm a little dry creatively.

Work is a sad, quiet place these days. Empty offices are everywhere. Today, a couple of guys came by with a cart to collect the phones from all the cubicles that are now empty. I've sent out a couple of e-mails that have come back with errors because the recipients had been fired. We had a meeting Friday morning with our director. The impact on the staff was not lost on her. As a matter of fact, she was quite sympathetic. She gave permission for us to have a "jeans week" this week. (Hey, if you have to wear business casual everyday, you don't know how nice it is to just wear a pair of jeans to work.) Also, she gave told us to do whatever it takes to get ourselves through this crisis. She recommended some down time, a visit to the company psychiatrist, or going out with our teams to see a movie. As strange as that sounds, it was better than our manager, who recommended in a separate e-mail that we might consider leaving the office on time (instead of working late) so we could maximize our time with our families.

Oh well. We're all trying.

This past weekend, I took my four oldest boy on an overnight trip to Higgins Lake. It wasn't a strictly fun getaway. My parents had loaned their house to another family for the 4th of July, and they wanted some assurance that the place had not been trashed. Although the other family had not done a stellar job of cleaning up after themselves, the house was in good shape. So, I didn't have a lot of work to do. We managed to have some fun. The evening we were there we got ice cream and enjoyed a nice fire in the backyard. The next day, I cleaned up the house, and we headed back down state. The boys wanted to swim, but the weather wouldn't permit it. Thunderstorms rolled in off and on all day. (This caused Christopher to comment, "This vacation is NO FUN!!!") At around 5:00 PM, we piled into the car to head back home. Now, this may seem like a happy ending, but it wasn't that simple. In the backseat of my little Focus were 3 tired, over-stimulated boys who couldn't keep their hands to themselves. Next to me behind the wheel was a student driver who was being distracted and irritated by everything that was going on in the backseat.

Man, was I glad to be home!!!

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The subject line of this post is a saying that one of my co-workers shared with me at work this morning as we stood around in the hallway and waited to hear if we would be able to keep our jobs. I told him that I thought that "laugh" was a little bit cruel for my tastes. "Chuckled" or "giggled" would have been better.

So, it went down today. The mass firings started at about 8:30 AM. I stayed in touch with my IT comrades in other buildings via IM. They told me that they could stand at the windows and watch the employees filing out to their cars with their boxs full of possessions.

The damage first hit my team at about 9:30. My boss came into my cube, clearly shaken. He had just found out that the person in the cubicle next to mine had been let go. He had showed up for work, and his badge had been deactivated. He found out later that he was gone.

The person sitting on the other side of me also had badge problems in the morning. He would try to find out if he still had a job all day until finally learning at 4:00 PM that he had been fired.

In my old department, a Ford veteran of 27 years was walked to the door.

Through it all, we paced, stood around sharing rumors in the hallways, ate, and tried to keep track of who had been fired. It was very dark. I tried to keep a good humor, cracking wise to make my friends laugh. (One of them thanked me at the end of the day for staying upbeat.) I tried coming up with lines that I would use if I was one of the unfortunate ones getting sacked. Among them were, "No, I'm not Tim Butler. He's already been walked out. I'm just cleaning off his computer," and "Are you from Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes Giveaway?"

The day wore on, and the scariest time was about mid-afternoon. There wasn't much time left to be fired, if it was going to happen. Then the unbelievable, crushing word came down - It had taken longer to sack everyone than they thought it would. The firings were going to have to be extended to Monday. Two more days to endure this. How could they do this? It was inhuman.

We waited it out. Around 4:30, my manager came around. "Go home," she said. "I can't say anything, but just go home." She looked really sad. What was going on? Was our whole department being outsourced and let go? That actually did happen in some cases. What did she know that made her so sad, but she couldn't tell us?

I went back to my desk and packed up to leave for the day. Tomorrow was going to be a sad repeat of this stress filled torture. I noticed a missed call on my phone. Rita had tried to reach me. I called home. Just as she picked up, an e-mail hit my Inbox. I saw the first sentence, and I hung up on her. Reading the e-mail, I couldn't believe my eyes. It was from our CIO. He was announcing that the firings were finished. Everyone who was being let go had been notified.

I had made it. I was going to be able to keep my job for now.

There are no happy people who work in my department tonight. Those of us who managed to keep our jobs are going to miss our co-workers who did not fare as well. It was so sad. Our delusions have been shattered as well. We finished up the Way Forward buyouts earlier this year and 30% of the company had left, and we thought we had seen the end of that type of thing. This was worse. And for those of us who weren't eaten by the sharks this time, the pack of them will probably be back in about 6 months to eat their fill again.

There's no security. Except in God.

Wrapping this up, I want to thank any who were praying for me. And I want to thank God for allowing me to keep my job at Ford. It is a blessing, even though times are tough there. And I know that if I don't make the cut next time or the time after that, He's over all things.

Ford is NOT my provider.

Multiple reliable sources peg tomorrow as "Black Thursday" at Ford ITI. That means that throughout my department, everyone (or almost everyone) who is going to be fired will be let go tomorrow during the day.

Gee, how much work are we going to get done tomorrow?

Only as much as we can while we are constantly looking over our shoulders.

ALL PRAYERS APPRECIATED!!!!

More news as it develops.

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Things are so bad at work right now that instant messaging is becoming a tool to keep track of your friends and make sure they have not been fired. (Or "involuntarily seperated," to use the current corporate lingo.)

One of my friends had a problem yesterday with his badge. It wouldn't work when he showed up for work. His heart skipped a few beats as he dealt with the sudden fear that he had been fired.

Things are not fun.

My sympathies to the folks at GM, who are the latest people to have to suffer a round of staff reductions.

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Well, I almost missed a huge opportunity yesterday. Something that I've been looking to do for a while now.

And the reason I almost missed it is because I am selfish.

Thursday nights are typically a welcome respite around our house. Isaac and Olivia attend Youth Group in Ann Arbor. Usually, I am not the one who takes them. Rita or another local Mom who drives that way gives them a lift. That leaves me at home with only the younger kids, who I can make go to bed early with my awesome Dad powers. Then, I get to sit around, relax, have a fire on the patio, listen to some mp3s, etc.

However, last night was one of the rare times that I had to drive to Ann Arbor. No problem. I thought a bit about what I could do while Isaac and Olivia were at church. The weather was warm, so I could walk around. Get myself some ice cream. Do some browsing in some shops. Hit Main Street. Go to a coffee shop.

For the evening, Ann Arbor was my oyster. I could do whatever I wanted.

My grandiose plan began to unravel when Philip asked, "Can I come with you?"

No. You can't.

"But I want to hang out with you."

There will be nothing for you to do.

"I'll do whatever you want to do."

No, I don't even know what I'm going to do.

"I'll bring a book or something."

No.

"Please?"

NO!!!

Whew. That settled that. My "me" time was still a go.

We ate dinner, got ready, and were poised to walk out the door.

That's when it happened.

Rita whispered to me, "You could take him to the Washtenaw Dairy."

(For those of you who are uninitiated, the Washtenaw Dairy is in Ann Arbor and is arguably the best place in southeast Michigan to get ice cream. Around the time that we were married, Rita and I lived a block away from it.)

I scoffed and turned to head to the door. Then, it hit me. Why don't I take him with me? I have a choice here - selfishness or fun with Philip. It's not even a sacrifice. I love spending time with my kids. But all that freedom to just kick back and do what I want to do by myself.....

A growl rose up in my chest, up my throat, and came out of my mouth.

Rita's eyebrows shot up, and she looked surprised.

Philip walked by, and I grabbed his shoulder.

"Get your shoes on. You're coming with me."

He was excited. So was I. I had made the right choice.

We dropped off Isaac and Olivia and headed to the University of Michigan campus. Philip told me, to my surprise, that he had never been here before. So, as we walked around, I told him stories about things that I remembered when I was a student. I showed him where I took my classes and some of the places I like to go in Ann Arbor. We didn't go to the Washtenaw Dairy, but we stopped by Stucchi's. Both of us ordered a big dish of ice cream with peanut butter cups mixed in. We stopped at Borders, and while we were shopping, Philip decided to use all of his cash on hand to buy a book for Nathanael. I was very touched by that gesture.

On the way back to the car, Phil talked to me about his future and what he thought he would like to do. He liked the U of M campus, but he thought that he would like to go to a smaller college. He said that he had no idea what he wants to do when he's older, and I told him that was fine as long as he settled on something he really loved.

It was a fine evening. And I almost missed it.

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The Butlers had a full evening last night. Jammed packed with mostly fun stuff.

We started off with a new Bible study curriculum that I'm trying out with the kids. Twelve weeks of Biblical principles and values that they should apply to their lives. Last evening's principle was "Truthfulness." Pretty solid, right? Well, it went pretty well. The program is called, "Learning From Dad," and is available here. It's written by a gentleman named Mally, who's had some good outcomes raising his own children, as you can see if you go to the web site.

As I said, things went pretty well. The kids were pretty squirmy, maybe due to the time of day. (Around 6:00 PM and before supper.) But I got some good participation. The only thing that I found personally frustrating was some of the questions and distractions. The older kids seemed to want to pull the discussion off point several times. The feeling of not really knowing what I was doing and having to fight to keep things on target got me a little flustered at times.

After the study, we headed out to Living Word for our mid-week gathering around the church firepit. Good friends, hot dogs, pop, chips, and smores. A really fun time for everyone. I continue to be happily surprised and blessed by how wonderful this new church is.

We got home around 10:00 PM. The younger half of the family was immediately sent to bed, and the rest of us (Rita, Isaac, Olivia, and me) settled in to watch a movie that we had rented earlier in the week - Juno. We were a bit apprehensive with letting the kids in on this, but we had heard that the movie was good and, despite the mature subject matter, had some good values. Besides, Isaac really wanted to see it. So, we trusted that, with our TV Guardian filtering out the saltier language and our teens armed with the best sex education Rita and I could provide, we began this two hour journey into a tale of teen pregnancy.

Warning - Spoilers for the movie follow. If you haven't already seen Juno, you may want to close your browser now.

On the plus side, we all agreed that Juno was a well-acted movie with a witty script. Ellen Page, the young actress who played the title role of Juno, a teen girl who finds herself with child after an ill-conceived (no pun intended) sexual encounter with her best male friend, was outstanding in the role. Similarly, the rest of the cast was excellent in their performances. The people were essentially likeable, with the exception of Jason Bateman's character, a thirty something married man who decides that he wants to leave his wife and get an apartment "in the city" where he and Juno can have a romance. (Yes, that essentially makes him a pedophile.) After a brief consideration of abortion as a way to solve her dilemma, Juno opts to have her baby and give him up for adoption to a yuppie couple, played by the aforementioned Bateman and Jennifer Garner. (Hence, the film's good rep among conservatives for having a pro-life theme.) As I said, the script is very witty, with Juno and her Dad receiving the best of the excellent dialogue. Lines like, "Pregnancy makes me need to pee like Seabiscuit," (spoken by Juno to the refined, yuppie couple) had us laughing out loud. The tender subject of teen sex was treated appropriately, with the one encounter depicted in the movie (between Juno and her friend) being shown briefly, in fleeting images of implied nudity, and not glorified whatsoever. This was a refreshing change. In just about every other movie I've seen, the only sex that's not glorious is between married people.

On the negative side of the street, we were confused by the movie. What was the point? Juno has her baby and gives him up for adoption. The final scene shows her sitting in the front yard with her friend (now her boyfriend, as the two declared their love for each other during Juno's pregnancy). The two sing a song to each other and then share a passionate kiss. After we turned the movie off, I asked, "Are they still having sex?" Isaac shrugged and said, "I guess they are." "Then," I declared, "The characters have learned nothing from their experience." After enduring the pain of an unwanted teen pregnancy, Juno and her boyfriend are repeating the same mistakes that they just got done paying for. They did not grow at all during the film. Even more frustrating, their parents reveal themselves to be complete idiots, allowing their kids to fall into temptation all over again. Very disappointing. Also, Juno's decision to go forward with allowing Vanessa (Garner) to adopt her baby even after she separates from her husband gives the implied message that Dads aren't necessary. (Although, I do have to say that maybe it was for the best, considering what a creepy dude her husband turned out to be.) Lastly, despite my previous comments about the sensitive handling of the subject matter, some of the more sexually oriented dialogue had Rita and me squirming in our seats as we listened to it in the presence of our teens.

Overall, Juno was a decent slice of life movie that dealt with a tender theme in a thoughtful manner. For our teens, it modeled good relationships between parents and kids as Juno and her family went through her ordeal in a mostly healthy and supportive manner. However, the morally ambiguous nature of the movie and the lack of development of the characters left us cold.

Thumbs up if you like this kind of drama, but it definitely has its problems.

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What a great holiday we had!!! A lot of fun throughout the weekend, but we were sure tired by the end.

The holiday got off to a great start on July 3. My boss sent us all home early to get a jump on the weekend, so I left Dearborn and headed over to the Plymouth Super Center, a gas station on Ann Arbor Road in Plymouth. Our new church, Living Word, was sponsoring a "gas buy down" to bless the community. As a congregation, we ponied up $3000 to lower the price by $.30 a gallon. We enabled the station to sell 10,000 gallons of gas for $3.89. It was a huge success, with people lining up an hour in advance for their cheap gas. We had a lot of fun, and we blessed a lot of people. The media was out in force, with a traffic copter, photographers, and camera crews from three stations being on hand. The coverage from WXYZ can be seen here.

The next day, we had plans to spend the holiday with our dear friends, the Carlsons. They live on a homestead outside of Saline. We arrived in the early afternoon and stayed until way too late for our own good. We were all tired by the time we left. It was a great day. We grilled delicious food, enjoyed the peaceful country setting, and had our own fireworks after dark. Lots of fun times. I really appreciate these wonderful friends, especially during a year when some friendships that seemed solid came to sudden and difficult conclusions. In a world where it's sometimes hard to depend on people, the Carlsons are incredibly devoted and caring. We love them.

The next day brought another meal with friends. This time, it was with Kevin and Jackie Grim at our house. Although it was the day after the Independence Day holiday, we wanted to have a barbeque with burgers and dogs for our pals. Unfortunately, our much abused grill had given up the ghost last year. A few days earlier, I had pulled it apart and made a list of parts I would need to fix it up. I expected the price to be around $40. I was shocked when it turned out to be twice that. Considering I could almost buy a new grill for that amount, we decided to replace instead of repair. So, Saturday morning, Rita and I struck out for Lowe's to purchase our new grill. I was hoping that we would be able to buy one assembled as I didn't want to be under the gun to put it together before the Grims arrived. Sure enough, we found exactly the one we wanted, and it fit pretty nicely in our van. Mission accomplished!

The Grims showed up a couple of hours later, and I happily grilled a huge helping of hamburgers, dogs, and brats on my new, huge, three burner grill. Dessert was a birthday cake baked by Olivia for Kevin. Fun! Well, the rest of our visit was pleasant, but I found that the Grims looked as tired as we felt. Both of our families played hard the day before, and it wasn't too long after the meal that Kevin and Jackie made their farewells.

The rest of Saturday and all day Sunday developed into down time. We laid around, watched TV, read, talked, and napped.

It was truly a great weekend!!! Wish they were all this good!

Yesterday was a milestone in our 12 year homeschooling journey.

Isaac had a long anticipated interview with an admissions counselor at Schoolcraft College. Although he's still in high school, we know that he's going to have to have some accomplishments that make him stand out when he applies for college in a couple of years. College course work was something that we thought would serve him well, not only from the standpoint of admission to a university but also from getting practical experience in a classroom setting. That's something of which he's had almost nothing.

I didn't attend the meeting. My job was to sit at my desk and pray.

According to Rita and Isaac, the interview was quick. They were pleased that the counselor seemed equipped and used to dealing with homeschooled students. He asked if we had any transcripts or standardized tests. No, we didn't have any of those. (I am about to begin work on generating transcripts for our high school students. I'm behind the curve as far as Isaac is concerned. We have never done standardized tests. Rita and I just haven't worried about them. Our high and mighty homeschool philosophy has always been that we didn't need them. Our kids were getting educated in what WE thought was important. Who cares what other people think they should know? Gulp. Time to come down from the clouds and be more practical.) Isaac was told that he would have to take a placement test before his admission would be considered. The test would take about 1.5 hours to complete. Isaac has never taken this type of a test before. It's a diffent experience doing your science quiz at home sitting on your bed and listening to your iPod. The counselor was generous and offered to let Isaac come back on a later day to take the test. He seemed a little nervous but said that he might as well get it over with.

Rita called me while he was taking the exam. She was relaxed about it. If he did well, it was validation and a big achievement. If he did poorly, well then...... he should have listened to us when we warned him about not being serious with his studies. I wasn't so nonchalant about it. This was a big deal. The first real test of how we were homeschooling. Many of our friends have youth who are either wrapping up or have finished their high school years. For the most part, they are excellent students with promising futures. Will Isaac fare as well? What if he doesn't? No college? Is he going to live in my basement for the rest of his life? YIKES!!!!

I got the call a few hours later. Isaac had done very well on his placement exam. He killed on Reading Comprehension and Language, placing at the college level in those areas. He did not do as well at Math, placing below his grade level. (Not surprising since this is one of his struggle areas. He and I are going to be working on his algebra together this summer. He also told me later that many of the questions on the test used mathematical notation that he wasn't used to and didn't understand. Later in the exam, he figured out what they were trying to ask him, but he had already gotten many of the problems wrong.) However, his placement test results were good enough for the counselor to offer him admission to Schoolcraft on the spot.

Isaac selected two classes to take this Fall - a beginning computer programming class and an English composition class.

We are so proud, so relieved, so happy. Congratulations, Isaac. Well done! I'm also very happy for Rita, who after years of sacrifice and effort, has produced a college student. Excellent!!!

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