The Servant's Quarters

Jenny - Really The End This Time

2009-07-30T19:20:00.003-04:00

Anyone who's been following my posts online for the past few months is probably familiar with the saga of our beloved Jenny. If you aren't up to speed and are interested in learning more, you might want to read the story at the following links:

http://tjbutler.blogspot.com/2009/03/my-girl.html
http://tjbutler.blogspot.com/2009/04/my-girl-sequel.html
http://tjbutler.blogspot.com/2009/04/new-beginning-for-jenny.html
http://tjbutler.blogspot.com/2009/04/goodbye-jenny.html
http://tjbutler.blogspot.com/2009/04/shes-alive.html
http://tjbutler.blogspot.com/2009/04/pass-peaches.html

Long story short for anyone who doesn't want to wade through all that - Butlers find stray, sickly dog in their backyard. Turns out to be the sweetest dog in creation. Butlers adopt dog. Dog turns out to be too sickly to keep. Butlers return dog to Humane Society. Terribly sad but cheer up when they discover that an employee at the Humane Society adopts sickly dog and everyone lives happily ever after.

And now, the rest of the story....

Last evening, we took Molly and visited the Humane Society on our way to Living Word for our mid-week meeting around the fire pit. Of course, we wanted to visit all of the cute puppies. However, our real main mission was to see if we could find out the latest info on our beloved Jenny. Was she still alive? How was her health? Was she living happily ever after?

We had to wait around for a while to talk to the manager of the place. When we arrived, she was busy assisting a family in their adoption of a dog. Finally, we had her ear. I introduced myself and told her we were there to find out what had happened to our first adoptee, Jenny (a.k.a. Popcorn). She remember us immediately, and she was eager to help us.

She sat down at the computer and began looking for the record of Jenny's adoptions. (Of course, we were thinking as she looked that the story might not have the ending that we wanted if she had to look up Jenny's records rather than just tell us that she was still doing well with her new family.) It took a few minutes, but she found the info she was looking for.

Jenny had lived in her new home for about two months. Like at our house, she was appreciated for the incredibly loving, affectionate dog that she was. However, her health had not improved, and we had been right that the problems we had been seeing were indicative of deeper, more serious problems.

Things finally came to a head for our dear girl around the beginning of June. She was found to have grown a tumor that was blocking her urinary tract. She was completely unable to void. An operation to clear the condition would have cost around $2000, and there was no guarantee that more tumors weren't growing in other areas of her body. (That was definitely something we suspected was going on when we owned her.) So, Jenny's adopted mom elected to have her put down.

Heather, the Human Society manager, remember that her employee had been very upset and had to take a day off of work to grieve the loss. Also, her surviving dog was so grieved at Jenny's death that the woman adopted yet another dog from the Humane Society as a companion for her pet. Obviously, others had the same reaction to Jenny that we did.

We walked out of there somber and not a little sad. We weren't exactly mourning because it had been months since we had seen Jenny. But we still loved her, and the news of her death was hard. But on the other hand, we had clearly made the right choice by taking her back to the Humane Society and adopting Molly instead. We were grateful that we had not taken a chance on her and had not been the family that had to decide to end her life.

We talked on the way to church about Jenny, remembering the week she had been ours. When we returned home, we pulled up some pictures of her on the computer. We were delighted to find out that Olivia had made a brief video of Jenny. There she was on the screen, drinking, waddling around. She even gave a bark and one of her little jumps at the end.

That was our Jenny.

Good-bye, girl. I'll never forget you.

Facing The Giants

2009-07-19T00:27:00.001-04:00

So, the other night, we put this movie called, Facing the Giants into the DVD player. This movie comes highly recommended by every Christian friend I have whose seen it. We were expecting big things, and in some cases, the movie delivered big time. In other ways...... um....... not so much.

The story in a nutshell: A football coach at a Christian high school can't seem to catch a break. His team hasn't had a good season in a loooooong time. His job is in jeopardy. He feels like a personal failure. His house has a disgusting smell that he can't get rid of. His car keeps breaking down. He's fed up and disgusted. In fact, he's so dispondent that he gives up. He decides that he has no recourse but to turn the entire situation over to God. He prays and reads his Bible, seeking wisdom. And as God is wont to do, He answers. Big time.

First the good: The movie was very well made, compared to other notable Christian flicks that sometimes come across as downright cheesey. The characters were very likeable. It had it's very inspiring moments. And I'll be honest here - the best thing that this movie had going for it was that my kids really enjoyed it and were very spiritually moved by it. Anything that teaches my kids that God is cool is ok in my book. So, I was happy that we watched it and I would do it again in a second.

However, this movie was very challenged in several areas. The ones that I picked up on were:

- The acting was mediocre at best. Not bad, but not very good either. It was bad enough that it kept me from getting fully absorbed in the plot of the movie. So, that was a problem.

- The story was UNBELIEVEABLY predictable. I'm not kidding here. Every plot point was absolutely telegraphed ahead of time. Shortly into the climatic football game at the end of the movie, I knew who was going to win, how they were going to win, and even what the final score was going to be. I had to shoosh Rita a couple of times because she knew what was going to happen and wanted to share her prediction with me. (She was always right.) And that is sort of related to my final criticism.....

- The message of this movie is not entirely true and not entirely wholesome. WHAT????? Butler, what are you talking about? Facing the Giants is an incredible Christian movie. Everyone loves it. It shows a beautiful depiction of a man facing his own personal giants by trusting in the the Lord Jesus. How can you criticise that? Well, it's pretty easily, actually. You see, this movie portrays God as a genie in a bottle. Need to pull your football team out of a slump? Rub the lamp, and God will bless you with a winning season and a state championship. You and your spouse struggling with infertility? No problem! Surrender to Jesus and your wife will be squeezing out kids every two years. Sick of your car breaking down all the time? Forget about it! God will drop a new car into your lap as soon as you pray about it. That is not what God is about. God has never, ever promised to smooth out all the bumps in life and reverse all your setbacks as soon as you trust in Him and decide to follow him. He never said that the life of the Christian would be easy. But He does promise that when you are going through the rough times, He would be at your side, walking with you and strengthening you. I know that God can and does deliver His followers from bad situations, but not all the time. Here's a real life example: Some friends of ours just buried their 35 year old daughter who died of cancer. They are devout Christians, as was their beloved daughter. For the three years of her illness, they were consumed with praying for her deliverance from the disease. In the end, for reasons that they and I do not understand, the Lord chose not to heal her of cancer. She died, and they are now going through the most unbelieveable pain that any person can go through.

I hate to think of what they would say about "Facing the Giants."

Rita and I both agreed that the movie would have been vastly improved if the lead couple had not had every burden lifted from them. If, for example, they were still infertile at the end of the movie. If, in the face of this hardship, they had said, "It is well with my soul. We trust You, O God, even though You have not blessed us with children. We will still seek You and put You in the highest place in our lives"

And that, I think would have been the best message my kids could have taken out of this movie.

The Bridge Builder

2009-06-20T22:10:00.004-04:00

In honor of Father's Day, I present what is probably my favorite poem. This piece was passed down to me by my grandfather, who in turn received it from his father in a letter. It was written by Will Allen Dromgoole

The Bridge Builder

An old man, going a lone highway,
Came at the evening, cold and gray,
To chasm, vast and deep and wide,
Through which was flowing a sullen tide.
The old man crossed in the twilight dim;
The sullen stream had no fears for him;
But he turned when safe on the other side
And built a bridge to span the tide.

"Old man," said a fellow pilgrim near,
"You are wasting strength with building here;
Your journey will end with the ending day;
You never again must pass this way;
You have crossed the chasm, deep and wide --
Why build you the bridge at the eventide?"

The builder lifted his old gray head:
"Good friend, in the path I have come," he said,
"There followeth after me today
A youth whose feet must pass this way.
This chasm that has been naught to me
To that fair-haired youth may a pit-fall be,
He, too, must cross in the twilight dim;
Good friend, I am building the bridge for him."

Memorial Weekend

2009-06-01T12:58:00.002-04:00

We took a super long weekend over Memorial Day and spent it at my parents place on Higgins Lake. We had a real blast. Hopefully, there is more of the same coming later this summer.

Instead of stealing Olivia's pictures off of her blog and posting them here (which I usually do), I'll just point you to her online place so you can see them there.

Olivia's Blog

Star Trek - The Movie

2009-05-29T08:38:00.003-04:00

A friend of mine asked me to share my thoughts about the new Star Trek movie either here or in private e-mail. Since I obviously never want to miss an opportunity to share my incredible brilliance with the world, I'm opting to make it a blog entry. (In case you didn't realize it, this particular entry is already dealing with the fantastic and the fictional!)

First, a little background on me for the uninitiated: I am a huge Star Trek fan. I've watched the various TV shows going back to the late 60's/early 70's. I own the entire original series and most of The Next Generation on DVD. I have thousands of incredibly useless Trek trivia facts taking up valuable space in my brain. If knowledge of Star Trek was a saleable skill in the job market, I could not only make a living at Star Trek, I'm sure it would make me a millionaire many times over. The least used game at my house is a Star Trek card set that's compatible with Trivial Pursuit. No one will play with me because I am unbeatable.

As you may guess, I have more than a passing familiarity with Star Trek. I know it, and I like it a lot. Anyone who wants to "relaunch the franchise" and re-tell the origins of Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock is going to find an interested but highly skeptical fan in me. I love the continuity of the series, and a movie that admits up front that it is rewriting the history of what has gone before is, in my opinion, already in trouble.

A couple of weeks ago, a dear friend of mine (a fellow Trek fan) and I each brought several of our kids to the theater to see the latest Star Trek movie. Rita couldn't make it, and her heart wasn't broken by that. She had already decided that this new movie looked "lame." We found our seats, passed out the popcorn and drinks, and waited for the lights to go down. When they did, the wild ride began.

Let me bottom line it for you before I do into my extended (mostly spoiler free) review: Star Trek was the most fun I've had in a movie theater in a long, long time. At just over 2 hours, it was a nonstop thrill ride that never let up. It was a funny, exciting, tense, smart, well acted, stunning film. When we walked out of the theater, EVERYONE was smiling. We eagerly compared notes about how good the movie was. No one had anything bad to say about it. At all.

James T. Kirk (Chris Pine) is a troubled young man. Born on the day of his father's death, he's rebellious, rude, irreverent, and a trouble-maker. On the planet Vulcan, young Spock (Zachary Quinto) is having problems of his own. Half human, he is the object of endless taunting by his peers. He tries to control his emotions, but his tormentors are relentless.

On the cusp of manhood, each of them reaches a crisis and makes a decision that will change their lives forever - they decide to enlist in Starfleet. And they do so just in time to face a dark, sinister menace from the future.

And therein hangs the tale....

The movie is outstanding in every way. The special effects are breathtaking. The script is witty and fresh. The casting is excellent. I admit that it took me a bit of time to get used to these new faces on characters that I've been familiar with for about 40 years. Chekov and Scotty were two who took a while to get comfortable with. What's really amazing is how well some of the actors slid into their parts. Pine is perfect as Kirk, and I dare say, I think he may even be an improvement on the original. He's every bit Jim Kirk without William Shatner's troubled acting style. Quinto could hardly improve upon Leonard Nimoy's Spock, but he's more than adequate to portray everyone's favorite Vulcan. And speaking of Nimoy, he's outstanding here. I was wondering how the elder Spock would fit in with all these young, fresh faces. The answer is... not bad at all. In fact, it took me a few minutes to happily realize that a scene between Pine and Nimoy was the first original Kirk/Spock scene I've witnessed in years. (Aside from the Pine/Quinto scenes, that is.) And it came off great.

The new Enterprise is beautiful. A marvelous update to the old girl. Yes, it looks a lot better than the cheesey sets from the original series, and we can overlook this. What???? Did I type that? Mr. I Love The Continuity Of The Old Series is actually being generous with changes that this movie makes to my beloved canon? That's right. You see, thanks to a pretty lame but beautifully executed plot device, the creators of this flick actually manage to not rewrite any Trek history. All the episodes on my DVDs at home are still just as valid in Trek continuity as ever. This movie just..... puts them on the shelf for a while.

Were there any negatives? Sure. There were a few. The plot at times STRAINS believeability too much with its reliance on coincidence and chance. Things sometimes just fall into place a bit too easily for our heroes. The movie is rated PG-13, which means that it does stray into dangerous territory at times. There's some language, although most of it is the kind of stuff you could expect from one of the later TV series. There's really only one scene where the boundaries are truly strained. It's a somewhat humorous send up to Kirk's lengendary habit of bedding alien women of various colors. I wish my kids hadn't seen it, but as there's no nudity and things get interrupted before they get too hot and heavy, I'd say it's fine for the older crowd.

So, this one gets a huge thumbs up. As a matter of fact, I'm looking for a free weekend to take my beautiful wife on a date to the theater. I can't wait to see it again!!!

Man, Do I Love the Failblog

2009-05-18T17:45:00.004-04:00

Just a couple of belly laughs for today. (WARNING: If you choose to visit the Failblog, my strong recommendation is that you click the link at the top of the page that shows you only G-Rated fails. The unfiltered site can be quite inappropriate. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!)

(I've think I've been to churches like this.)

Introducing..... Molly!

2009-05-18T17:33:00.002-04:00

Well, it has taken me long enough. Please excuse my tardiness, but things have been a bit on the busy side.

Here's a picture of our newest family member, Molly!!!

Blessed Are You, The Lord My God

2009-05-01T10:15:00.002-04:00

In case anyone reading this is in doubt, let me clear it up for you - GOD IS GOOD!!!

By His very nature, He is good. He doesn't have to do anything to prove that He is good. But when He favors us by giving us what we ask for, it is only right that we proclaim it to the world.

So, let me say that..... GOD IS GOOD!!!

Mom was taken into surgery at 7:30 this morning. I hunkered down in the waiting room for the long haul. I had brought lots to do. There was a wifi hotspot, so one of the first things on my todo list was to update my blog. I then answered some e-mails.

Then, a funny thing happened.

I was called up to the front desk. There, an attendant waited to take me back to the Recovery Room.

The Recovery Room?

It was around 8:30. An hour? What was going on?

I was then informed that the surgery was over. Actually, that's not right. It had been canceled. The doctor had been able to set both of the broken bones in Mom's arm from the outside. No surgery had been necessary. Another hour or so in recovery, and we were on our way home.

I'm typing this entry from my parent's bedroom. I'll be here today, tonight, and a good portion of tomorrow until my brother comes to relieve me.

The prayers of the saints are still very much appreciated as the next few days will present some challenges. But nothing compared to what they would have been if the surgery had taken place.

A very sincere and heartfelt thank you to everyone who has been praying for us this morning. My friends, I can't express it on my blog. You are loved. I appreciate you all.

And thanks be to Almighty God, who has once again shown that He loves his children and delights in blessing them. Father, I love you and thank you.

The Sitch

2009-05-01T07:32:00.001-04:00

All right, Prayer Warriors! Start your engines!!!

I'm spending the day today at Annapolis Hospital in Wayne. (As a matter of fact, I'm typing this right now from the Surgical Waiting Room.) No, it's not me that's going under the knife.

I'm afraid Mom is one who'll be going under the knife today.

Here's what's happening - About a week ago, Mom took a bad fall while out for dinner with my Dad and Uncle Jim. She broke her arm in two places right above the wrist. After a few days at home with a temporary cast, she finally got the word that the type of break that she has can't be set. It's going to require surgery and the insertion of a plate to allow the bones to heal normally.

So, here I am. I'm expecting to be here for most, if not all of the day. Mom's back being prepped right now. I'll get to see her briefly before the operation.

Dad is home alone, and that's another exciting adventure in itself. Rita is going to be keeping an eye on things there and helping him out if he needs it.

Here're our prayer requests:

- The operation to set Mom's broken bones will go without problems
- Comfort for Mom after the surgery
- Quick restoration of the bones in her wrist and no problems with her getting the use of her hand back
- Protection for my Dad today as he stays at home alone waiting for word on how Mom's doing
- Provision for the care of my both Mom and Dad in the days to come
- Protection for my Aunt Fran as she travels downstate to spend a few days providing in home care for my folks
- And while we're at it, A HUGE THANK YOU to the Lord for providing help in the person of Aunt Fran. This is not the first time she has been an angel of mercy to my folks. She is very caring and very generous to take time out to come and serve so selflessly. I truly do thank the Lord for her. Please join me in a prayer of gratitude.

Good Golly, Miss Molly!!!!

2009-04-20T14:52:00.001-04:00

As the late Paul Harvey would say, now it's time for the rest of the story.

When we left off, Rita and I had just surrendered our beloved Jenny back to the Humane Society due to her health issues. Afterwards, we went to the Adoption Center, and we immediately zeroed in on a beautiful chocolate lab named, "Bianca." In the Get Acquainted Room, she was a bundle of energy but very manageable. She settled down when she was told to, seemed very smart, and knew several basic commands. We had promised the kids that we would not adopt a dog without them, so we asked the staff if we could reserve Bianca until later in the day. They agreed, probably because we had just gone through such a bad experience with Jenny.

When we returned, the kids liked what they saw. We played with Bianca for a few minutes, and almost everyone was in favor of our choice. (We did have one notable exception. One of the kids who is still struggling with the choice of this dog.) Only one more hurdle remained - introducing Bianca to Walker.

Well, that went off almost without a hitch. The dogs didn't display any hostility towards each other. There was only one moment when Bianca tried to play too harshly with Walker, and he growled at her in return. (Little did we know, Bianca's attitude towards play would be a difficulty that we are still struggling to overcome. But I think Walker is finally getting the message across to her.) So, we adopted her right away.

While the adoption was proceeding, the little boys wanted to know where Jenny was. I kept telling them that she was in the building but the doctors were taking care of her and we couldn't visit her. (So sad.)

Well, Molly (as we renamed her later that day) is doing great. She is energetic for sure. In fact, although they told us at the shelter that she's 5 years old like Walker, we believe she's actually younger. We hadn't realized how much Walker had slowed down in his middle age until we got to see him side by side with Molly. She's not nearly as affectionate as Jenny, but she loving enough. Also, she's very protecting of the family. Apparently, the chocolates are the most protective of all the lab varieties. Whenever there's a noise that she doesn't recognize, she perks up and often barks until she figures out who or what it is. Some people might think that that's a problem, but I like having a dog who's willing to make some noise when there's a problem. Now, I've got two of them, and it definitely helps me sleep easier at night.

Molly only has two problems, as far as I can tell:

1) She's not Jenny. We all still miss our big, old, fat stray. Molly's a great dog, but bonding with and then losing Jenny is definitely a hinderance to building close ties to our new dog.

2) Gas. Molly came to us with some type of intestinal problem. I am not exaggerating when I say that we have adopted the most flatulent dog in southeast Michigan. The first evening, she was breaking wind (with disasterous consequences) every 3 minutes. It was horrible. At one point, I took her out into the yard to relieve herself. What happened next was like something from a horror movie. In Smell-O-Vision.

When we turned in that night, Molly parked herself on the floor on my side of the bed right under my pillow. Right where Jenny slept. Oh boy. This was going to be a fun night. Fortunately, I fell asleep right away and wasn't disturbed by rank smells, monsters under the bed, or anything of the like.

That is, I wasn't disturbed until about 6:00 AM. At around that time, I awoke to a very rank, overpowering odor in the room. Our dogs bowels were definitely on the scene and making themselves known. I buried my face in my pillow. No avail. I could STILL smell her. She finally let loose with a roar that woke Rita up too and made us both sit straight up in bed. Knowing that sleep wasn't going to happen without breatheable air, we climbed out of bed and each took one of the dogs for a walk.

Later in the day, Liv and I took Molly to Specialty Pets to be measured for a training collar and some other doggie goodies. We had to keep rolling the windows down in order to breathe. If you saw a gold Focus on I-275 this past weekend with windows that kept going up and down and two people inside looking like they were being gassed to death, you may have seen us.

Fortunately, Molly overcame her..... infirmity. We tried to moderate her meals a bit and gave her yogurt after each meal. (That last suggestion came from http://www.dogflatulence.com. Yes, there's an entire web site devoted to dogs with this issue.) She came out of it after a couple of days, and we are happy to say, she is now pooping normally. It's a good thing, too. At the height of our distress, I told the whole family that I couldn't live like this and if Molly couldn't get things under control, she was going back, too.

Yeah, that was pretty drastic. But you try living in a house where the air's so thick from dog farts that you think you're lost in a London fog.

It was not pretty.

(Please excuse the lack of photos of our new doggie. We've just recovered from a huge computer crash, and it'll take me some time to download the pictures I've taken of the girl.)

Pass the Peaches

2009-04-20T08:33:00.002-04:00

Here's the latest (and my last) update on our beloved Jenny. On Friday, I called the Humane Society to thank Alicia, the young lady who contacted us to let us know that our former dog had not been put down and had been adopted by one of the Humane Society employees. I'm sure I didn't do justice in that brief phone call to the joy and peace of mind that she had given us. Just really, incredibly considerate of her.

Anyway, Jenny is doing well. The young woman who adopted her loves labs and has a couple of seniors herself. She originally named Jenny, "Popcorn" when she arrived at the shelter after one of her own dogs at home. So, now that she's adopted Jenny, she couldn't keep the name "Popcorn". Jenny's new name is "Peaches". I have no doubt that she is every bit as happy and loving and affectionate as she had been in our home.

Jenny is still sick. She hasn't been cured, but her new owner is committed to seeing her through her skin problems and nursing her back to health.

Goodbye, girl. Have a great and long life!

SHE'S ALIVE!!!!

2009-04-16T15:25:00.000-04:00

I was working on my latest entry about our new dog when my cell phone rang. It was a call from home. Nathanael was calling to tell me that the Humane Society left a message on our answering machine.

JENNY IS STILL ALIVE!!!!!

Not only that, but she has a new home! One of the workers at the Humane Society adopted her. I don't have any other details right now, but we're going to be calling up there either today or tomorrow to find out more details.

Surprisingly, I can't help feeling a bit conflicted about this. Did we give up on her too soon? I miss her so much, but now she's no longer mine. However, we did give her up. We had the choice about taking her on, and we decided not to. We didn't take the chance. How can I resent someone else who decided to take that chance on her?

But those feelings pale in comparison to my overwhelming joy at the news! MY GIRL is alive and has a home! Thank you, Lord. You heard my prayer. I may not get to be her owner, but someone's loving her and taking care of her!

WHAT A BLESSING!

Goodbye, Jenny

2009-04-14T08:28:00.001-04:00

"If you have a dog, you will most likely outlive it; to get a dog is to open yourself to profound joy and, prospectively, to equally profound sadness." - Marjorie Garber

It is with great sadness that I relate to you, Good Reader, the final chapter in the story of my beloved dog, Jenny.

Our dear adoptee had been with us for a few days, and we were enjoying her thoroughly. Olivia and I took her to the Specialty Pet Store in Plymouth for her collar, leash, and first chew toys. She had staked out her favorite places to lay in the house. I was enjoying having her sleep on the floor right beside me every night. When I'd come home from work, both the dogs would greet me enthusiastically, but it was Jenny who gave me the most joy. Too fat to move very much, she would bounce up and down on her front legs until I paid attention to her. She loved to give big sloppy kisses, and she was an awesome cuddler.

On the Tuesday after the adoption, I called home to see how everyone was doing. Rita answered the phone and before I could even ask about the dogs, she said, "I'm worried about our new girl."

She was very concerned about a growth under Jenny's chin was cancerous. Also, it seemed to her that some of the hairless spots under the dog's chin were active, red, and growing. We went back and forth on what we should do. Finally, we decided to take her back to the vet clinic at the Humane Society.

I took my lunch hour at the clinic so I could be there just in case the doctor had some really bad news for us, and we had to make a really bad decision.

The doctor examined Jenny, and all seemed well. The growth was almost surely not cancerous. The checked out the hair loss and decided that it was associated with some previous leash trama. I sighed with relief and thanked God. But Rita pressed the issue, pointing out the areas that seemed to be active and growing. The vet asked us to wait while he stepped out with Jenny and consult with two other doctors. When they returned, he told us that none of the doctors were sure what was wrong with Jenny. He didn't think it was contagious (so Walker and the children were safe), but he couldn't say so for sure. Without a definite diagnosis, he did the best he could. He sent us home with a round of antibiotics and some theraputic shampoo. The shelter volunteered to pay for the first batch of medication, and the shelter manager briefly met with us to discuss options. If we wanted, we could have our money back or exchange Jenny for another dog. No way were we giving up on our beloved doggie.

We immediately started gave Jenny a bath and started her on the meds. A couple of days went by. Things seemed to be improving. Jenny was getting downright frisky. She seemed to be dropping a few pounds. She was getting stronger. We were loving her more and more every day.

One evening, Rita decided to measure and chart the bald spots on Jenny's neck. I held her down, Rita measured, and Olivia charted the location and size of each patch. We were excited to see that the medicine seemed to be working. Several of the patches seems to be scabbing and healing. What a relief. This was going to work out.

The next day was Thursday, and I arrived home around 5:00 PM, ready for the long holiday weekend. I came through the front door, and in the living room, Liv and Rita had Jenny down on the ground. They were examining her neck.

Rita said, "The patches are worse. And there's one in particular that looks really angry."

I looked at the neck. Almost all of the patches were ringed by red, enflamed skin. The hair was falling out. We remeasured some of the patches, and there had been a very significant increase in their sizes across the board. The meds weren't working.

I said, "That's it. She's going back to the Humane Society tomorrow morning."

For the next several hours, we second guessed and debated that decision. Shouldn't we take Jenny to our vet for a second opinion? But what if this was contagious? We didn't even know what we were dealing with.

Ultimately, it was Rita who stated the bottom line.

"I don't care if Jenny's bald. I can live with a bald dog. But I can't live with the idea that this sickness could infect our healthy dog and our kids."

We had an old dog who had a sickness that the vets couldn't identify. It could be a symptom of a much more serious condition going on under the surface. We could spend hundreds of dollars fighting this and still lose the battle. Or Jenny might only live another year or so anyway.

We finally decided to stick with the decision to surrender her in the morning.

The kids were devastated. I was worse. This was MY DOG. I had found her. Rescued her. Adopted her. Nursed her.

I played with Jenny that night. She was more energetic than I had ever seen her. We played tug of war with one of her toys. At one point, she got so excited that she began chasing Walker around the room and barking at him. It was hilarious watching this fat dog toddling after the much larger Walker. I don't think Walker knew what to make of it.

The next morning, I dragged myself out of bed early after a very restless night. I wanted to spend as much time as I could with Jenny before it was time to go to the shelter. It was so sad. I laid on the floor with her. I told her what a great dog she was. I prayed for her. I couldn't believe this was happening to my Jenny.

Rita and I decided to surrender Jenny alone. The kids all said goodbye, and we went to the shelter in the late morning. We were both close to tears. Jenny was so good. So loving. She was our big bundle of affection. She deserved better. But there was nothing else we could do.

We had to wait in line at the Animal Surrender Office. While we waited, Rita filled out paperwork. I sat on the floor next to Jenny, petting her and talking to her. It seemed to take forever. It was torture.

Finally, it was our turn. Rita took the lead, talking to the Humane Society staffer. I stayed with Jenny like glue. I knew I was upset but I didn't realize how upset Rita was and how much I was affecting her.

She bent down and said to me, "You have to leave right now. Say goodbye. If you break down, so will I. And I need to do this. Go. Now."

I tried to argue, but she insisted. So, I put my arm around Jenny, hugged her, and said, "Jenny, you are a great dog. I love you so much." I kissed her on the head. She licked my face. And I left.

That was the last time I saw her.

We had decided to adopt another dog, so I headed to the Adoption Center to look at the available pooches. But I was clearly upset. My heart wasn't in it. None of these dogs was for me because none of them was Jenny.

GOD'S PROVIDENCE - EXAMPLE #1652: While I was wandering around the Adoption Center, I came across a couple of familiar faces. I thought I recognized a couple who were visiting with a small beagle in one of the "Get Acquainted Rooms." I walked by three times looking in at them before I got up my courage to knock.

"Excuse me, but aren't you the couple that was interested in adopting Popcorn last weekend? My family and I were the ones who did take her home."

They recognized me as soon as I mentioned the name that the shelter had given Jenny. I filled them in on the whole story, barely managing to keep it together. It was obvious to them how hurt I was, and they were very compassionate. They were very affirming and comforting. Rita joined us in a few minutes, and we both told them that as painful as the situation was, we were glad that we went through it instead of them. We wouldn't have wanted it to happen to them, and they seemed genuinely touched by that. We wished each other well and left.

Later in the day, we asked one of the staffers if "Popcorn" was going to be put down. She looked a bit tentative.

"Yes, I think that's what they're going to do. They may have already done it. But that's definitely what they're thinking."

So, my girl is gone now. It was a great journey, and she stole my heart. I have some wonderful memories, and I kept some momentos - her collar, her toys. We have pictures. And we have the love. She was a really special dog. Don't take my word for it. I am a sentimental sap. But we all miss her. The little boys talk about how we can adopt Jenny again after the doctors fix her up. (I tell them that Jenny's probably already living with a new family who loves her very much.)
Rita says she still misses her. Everyone shed some tears.

And that's how the story ends. But we do all live happily (for the most part) ever after. In my next entry, I'll tell you about the new member of our family whom we adopted on Friday afternoon. We're planning on her staying around for a very long time.

Goodbye, sweet Jenny. You were a great dog. The best.

My Laugh For The Day

2009-04-06T22:02:00.001-04:00

I know this isn't very...... liberated...... of me, but I laughed so hard when I saw this that I almost fell out of my chair.

(Hey, Rita laughed, too.)

A New Beginning for Jenny

2009-04-05T22:54:00.004-04:00

An alternate title for this entry could be, "My Girl - The Final Chapter".

Saturday afternoon, we loaded up the van with Butlers and headed over to the Westland Humane Society to visit "Popcorn," as she had been named by the Humane Society Staff. We were not planning on adopting her, although we weren't closed off to the idea. The main reason we were going was to reconnect, look in on her, and see how she was doing.

When we arrived, we told the front desk that we wanted to visit with "Popcorn." We got an immediate reaction. She was the shelter favorite. All the staff loved her because she was so sweet and affectionate. One of them had even briefly considered adopting her but decided not to. We were also told that another family was considering adopting her, and we couldn't be sure if she was available to visit us. But, we were told to go back amongst the dogs and find her. If her pink card was on the door, she was still available. We should bring the card back up to the front desk.

We walked back. One thing that surprised me (pleasantly) was the very nice cubicle each dog had. I expected a small cage with no room and a grated floor so that the waste could fall through into a pan. These dogs were living in pretty comfortable surroundings. Big glassed in rooms. Very nice.

We found "Popcorn." She was laying there looking out of the window at us. She didn't look happy or excited. Just content and at peace. She had been cleaned up and her nails were clipped. She was still pretty fat, though.

Her pink card was there. We snatched it up and continued looking at the other dogs. There was another one at the shelter named Emily that we were potentially interested in as well, but we didn't see her. So, we headed up to the front desk with "Popcorn's" card.

When I turned it in and said that we wanted to visit with Our Girl, I ended up having to fill out an adoption form to be able to do it. That surprised me, but it wasn't a contract. I wasn't agreeing to the adoption. Just filling out the paperwork.

A young lady took us back and showed us to a "Get Acquainted" room. We sat in there and waited for "Popcorn" to arrive. The excitement was building.

Suddenly, we saw her familiar form waddling up the hallway towards us. She came in and suddenly found herself the absolute center of attention for a whole crowd of affectionate Butlers. Even Rita, who I wouldn't describe as a dog person, joined in. When it was my turn to pet her, I didn't get the idea that she recognized me. But she was sure happy to see all of us, and she appreciated the petting that I gave her. She had been cleaned up, and she smelled a lot better than she had the last time I saw her.

While we played with her, the young lady who escorted her to us went over her medical report. Of course, the biggest concern was her weight. Other than that, she was in surprisingly good health. She was eating and drinking fine. The vet had not found anything else to be concerned about except an ear infection, which she was receiving medication for. As she was 8 years old, "Popcorn" could be expected to live another 2 to 4 years if her health continued to be good.

Then, she left us alone to discuss whether or not to take the next step.

We talked about it. I was very unsure. My heart definitely wanted to go forward with an adoption, but my head was putting forth some pretty good arguments against. Money was tight already. Could we afford another dog? And there was already another family interested. Surely, she would be adopted out. But one thing that had been weighing heavily on me was the adoption FEE. I expected it to be around $300. But "Popcorn" had already been spayed, and it was much, much lower than I expected.

On of my main concerns just evaporated before my eyes.

I finally just put Rita on the spot. "Honey," I said with all of the husbandly leadership I could muster. "You decide. I'll go along with anything you say."

Rita looked around to see eight sets of young, pleading eyes focused on her. "Oh thanks a lot! My hero!"

We waited for the staffer to return as Rita had some additional questions. She finally came back, and Rita fired away. Were her hips ok? Yup, the vet couldn't find anything wrong with her hips. But the weight was a real problem. We'd have to get her to lighten up. Did the vet take any x-rays? Nope, we had no idea what's under all that fat. She could have tumors and all kind of health problems. But she was acting healthy, eating her food and water and taking her walks.

Ok. We decided. "Popcorn" belonged to us now.

I took a couple of the kids and went up front to go through the adoption process. Rita stayed behind with OUR DOG.

Gentle reader, I'll spare you the boring details of the adoption process. It was a total bore.

But here's where the story does get a bit sad.

As we walked out with our new dog (who by this time had been renamed "Jenny"), an older couple was standing by the door. The gentleman held the door for me, smiled and said, "Good luck," as I walked out.

I thanked him and headed for the van, wondering if he volunteered at the Humane Society.

We pulled away from the parking lot, and Rita said, "That makes me feel sad."

"What does?"

"That couple you passed by the door? They were the other family that wanted to adopt her."

Rita went on to tell me that while I was up at the front desk taking care of the adoption, this other couple came looking for Jenny. She found them looking at our dog a bit forlornly through the window. Stepping out of the room to have a chat with them, she discovered that they knew all about us finding Jenny and that we had decided to go ahead and take her home. They were so disappointed. They had seen her on the web site and really had their hearts set on getting her.

If I had known, I probably would have opted to just them have her. She would have made a great dog for them. Laid back. Relaxed. Calm.

We just have to have faith that they'll find the pet that's right for them.

As I'm typing this, Jenny has just gone out to potty for the last time tonight. She's perfectly house trained and is so easy to care for. Her ear seems to be clearing up. It appears that she'll be easy to train. She and Walker are getting along fine. She's very affectionate and is just so happy to be with us.

We're also starting to learn more about her. Her weight problem appears to be the result of being fed table food exclusively. She has refused all dog food and treats. We finally decided to buy a can of meat flavored, wet dog food and mix it in with her regular food. That did the trick, and she devoured it. So, we'll have to wean her off of the additive until she's on pure, dry dog food.

There are also some pretty nasty markings around her neck. Obviously, she's spent quite a bit of time tied up somewhere. That would probably account for her stinky condition when we found her since she was probably tied up where she went to the bathroom.

Most heart breaking for me tonight is that Rita has discovered that she's developing cataracts. Sad. Hopefully, they'll be very slow in taking her sight from her. But even if she goes blind, she'll still be well cared for.

Jenny's got a busy week ahead. She needs one last shot and a visit to our vet for a complete exam. Then we'll get her license from the city. I've already bought her training collar and leash, so school is about to begin. (As she seems quite eager to please, basic training should be pretty easy.)

Below is the first official picture of Jenny as a member of the family!!!

My Girl - The Sequel

2009-04-02T17:50:00.003-04:00

MY GIRL IS ALIVE AND KICKING!!!!!

YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

I am so happy that there's no way a blog entry could do my mood justice.

When I came home from work today, Olivia made some cryptic comment to Rita about "showing me the dog." I assumed that she had found another dog online that she wanted to adopt. (We've been thinking about getting another one after I found the stray. But we're pretty skiddish about it.)

After dinner, the family led me out into the living room, and there on the Westland Humane Society web page was my darling girl in all her glory. It probably took them a few days to get her cleaned up, checked out, and spayed.

So, she's looking for a family. We don't have a minute to spare before the weekend, but if she's still there this Saturday, we're going to go for a visit and...... who knows?

We might end up adopting her after all.

Here's the web site where you can see some pictures of my girl:

http://search.petfinder.com/petnote/displaypet.cgi?petid=13395572

My Girl

2009-03-30T19:29:00.001-04:00

I know I'm a sentimental sap, but this is ridiculous.

Ok, it seems that Rita and I managed to get a new dog. That is, in addition to the huge monster we already own.

A couple of Sundays ago, I was sitting in our family room, enjoying the latest episode of Ax Men on the History Channel. (Olivia had the line of the day. From another room, she yelled, "Hey Dad, what are you watching? It sounds like you've got a heart monitor going in there!" Ah yes. Those lumberjacks. How they do love their F-bombs.) At the time, Walker was out in the yard taking care of business. As I watched the TV, I noticed a strange dog that I had never seen before coming into view through our door wall. She was a yellow lab, walking very slowly. As she passed by, I couldn't help noticing that Walker was aware of her, too. In fact, he was bringing up the rear. I mean, he was really bringing up the rear. His nose was so far up her backside that I was afraid it would take a trip to the vet to get it out.

I jumped off the couch and was out the door in a second. I greeted her happily, and she likewise looked like she was happy to be paid attention to.

Some things were immediately obvious. She was very old. She was very fat. She had some kind of health problems going on because she couldn't catch her breath. She was panting incessantly. Her toe nails had never been clipped. They were incredibly long and curved back in on themselves. Worse of all, she smelled horribly. Like a barnyard. Total scent of dog poop.

Still I stroked her head and talked to her. She seemed to like my attention, but she was on the move. She wanted to leave. I ran into the house and got a dog bisquit, hoping that some food would convince that maybe she should hang around for a while. She refused the offer. While I followed her around the neighborhood, I yelled for Philip to bring me a collar and leash so I could get her under control. He took a long while to find it, and while she was moving pretty slow, she still managed to give me the slip. When Phil returned, we managed to find her again in short order. She hadn't gone far.

We brought her around to the front of our house, where we offered her some water, which she gratefully accepted. Then she plopped down in the shadow of our car while we discussed what to do with her. We called the police. Bad news. The animal control officer was off for the weekend and none of the other officers could transport animals. The woman I spoke to suggested that if I would transport the old girl myself, she would arrange for an officer to meet me at the shelter.

No way. I'm not letting that stinky beast in my car.

But we had to choose. Either keep her for the night ourselves or take her to the shelter.

Neither sounded good to me. So, I set off with my new girl for a little walk. I knew she didn't live on my street, so we went a block over. This took a while because she plodded along very slowly. I asked everyone I met if they knew who she was. Everyone told me that they didn't recognize her and had not seen her around before today. Not promising. I knew there was a house down the street that used to have a big, fat yellow dog, so I headed in that direction. However, it became clear that we were not going to make it there. The old girl was just panting and working too hard. So, I decided to take her back home.

When we got there, Rita suggested that we let her spend the night in our garage. Maybe in the morning, the owner would come around looking for her. No way, I said. We already had one dog on the premises. I didn't think it was fair to Walker, and I thought that making her sleep in the garage was kind of mean. (Told you I was a sap.) So, I put some towels in my backseat and decided to drive the old girl to the shelter.

It made me sad to see her reaction. When she saw that she was going for a car ride, she got so excited. Her tail started working like crazy. The look of joy on her face was unmistakeable. She struggled to climb up onto the seat, and once she did, she plopped down like a queen. Rita and I were both touched by it. Obviously, she was a loved dog, even though she hadn't been well cared for. Rita said, "She still has her smile."

I drove the 10 minutes to the shelter, talking to my girl all the way. We arrived and waited a few minutes. We walked around. I bent over and talked to her. She wagged her tail.

When the officers arrived, they interviewed me for a few minutes, wanting to know my name and address. They asked me how I found the dog and what I had done. I felt a little like a criminal, and it wasn't until afterwards that I thought that they may have thought that I was just dumping my own pet for the city to deal with.

Inside the building, a cage was all ready for my dog. They had food and water for her, and a door in the wall led to an outside kennel. They officers told me to put her in the cage myself. They wouldn't help. She didn't want to go in. I had to force her inside. Finally, she surrendered, and we shut the door behind her.

It was done, and I left. As I drove home, I couldn't escape the feelings of sadness.

The next day on my way home from work, I swung by the shelter to check on my girl. I was disappointed to see that the outdoor kennels were completely walled off by a privacy fence. I had to peek through the cracks to look in at her. There she was. I couldn't tell if she had been cleaned up or had her nails clipped, but she definitely looked more spry than she had the day before. When she heard my voice, she started loudly barking. Yup, I think prison life was agreeing with her.

The animal control officer, a fellow named Jim, came out outside to see who was stirring up his dogs. I introduced myself and told him why I was there. He seemed to genuinely appreciate me driving the old girl to the shelter and my continuing interest in her. I was delighted to hear that a whopping 80% of dogs at the shelter are reunited with their owners. Maybe there was hope for my dog after all. I was also happy to hear that after at least 7 days (or more if the police think there's hope that the owner may show up), the dogs are sent to the Humane Society to be considered for adoption. (I had thought that unclaimed dogs were actually destroyed at the shelter.) Only those dogs who couldn't be adopted from there were put to sleep. (I took comfort in this, even though I knew that my old, tired friend would never be adopted out.)

I continued to stop by every day on my way home from work. The other dogs came and went, by my old girl was still there on Friday afternoon. I called to her from the fence. She didn't bark but looked at me curiously.

On Monday, I stopped by again. I knew she probably wouldn't be there, but I didn't want to miss a chance to see her again just in case. Her kennel door was still open, which means that someone was home. (The others were all closed and unoccupied.) I called. Nothing stirred. I tried to get a better angle to see if I could peer in and see a hint of her yellow fur. Nothing. Well, at least someone was home. Maybe she was still at the shelter....

Tuesday, I returned. The door to the kennel was still open. "Hey, girl!" I yelled.

A muzzled face looked out of the dog house at me.

It was covered in black fir.

My girl was gone. She had probably moved onto the Humane Society the day before. In fact, in all probability, she had probably been euthanized the day before, too. No one would want to adopt an old, fat dog in poor health.

I stood at the fence for a minute. It wasn't a shock. It wasn't a tragedy. It was probably for the best. But that feeling of sadness was back.

"Goodbye, girl," I muttered under my breath.

I put back on my sunglasses, got in my car, and headed for home.

My dog, Walker, would be waiting there for me. And that made me very happy.

Welcome to the 24th Century

2009-03-22T19:33:00.005-04:00

At the beginning of March, we celebrate two birthdays in our household. Nathanael and Christopher were born 2 years and 2 days apart at the beginning of March. As is our typical practice, the birthday boys get to pick what our family does to mark their special day. It always involves that child picking a favorite amusement, museum, activity, etc. and the rest of us going along for the ride. This time was no exception, although it did turn out to be a little bit different this year.

One the of the rules that we always have about Nathanael and Christopher is that we will never combine their birthdays. Each of them deserves to have their own day, and they are each going to get it. I take both birthdays off, they each get their own breakfast at the restaurant of their choice with me, and they each get to pick what the family does for a day. We never take the easy way out and tell them they have to pick one "special, big" thing together.

This year was an exception.

This year, we did everything together. Part of the reason was because they were both sick. Nathanael got sick the day before his birthday, and he was down with a fever for a week afterwards. He was just recovering and we were about to go ahead with our birthday plans when Christopher went down with a fever. Fortunately, he didn't catch the same virus, and he wasn't sick for nearly as long as Than.

Finally, they were both healthy, and I scheduled my day off of work to celebrate their birthdays.

Like I said, the crazy scheduling was PART of the reason. The main reason is their choice of where to go. They both wanted to do the same thing, and with the price tag attached, we decided that it would be all right to combine just this once. So, on March 11, the Butlers packed up in the morning and went to downtown Detroit for our appointment in the 24th century.

We went to the Detroit Science Center to attend Star Trek: The Tour.

Now, most of the people who are reading this blog know that I have a lifelong love for the Star Trek television series. From my earliest days of cobbling together makeshift phaser guns and communicators as a small boy to feverishly video taping Star Trek TV episodes as a young adult to collecting the various shows on DVD today, I have been a huge Trekker for decades. When Rita and I were a young married couple (pre-kids), we attended several Trek conventions in Dearborn.

So, needless to say, I was at least as delighted, thrilled, excited, geeked, and just plain crazy to get downtown to the Science Center as any of my brood. This was a fantasy come true.

We landed at the Center around noon. The Tour was open until 3:00 PM, so we figured that had plenty o' time. We walked in and were greeted by a huge model of the Enterprise from the early Star Trek movies. I just watched it slowly rotate around for a few minutes until the family started clamoring to get the show on the road. I got in line and was soon buying tickets from the cashier.

Now, the first peculiar thing I noticed was that all of the Science Center employees were wearing something that had to do with Star Trek. Some of them had Trekker name tags. Others were wearing full costumes from the series. That, in and of itself, wasn't strange. What was strange and very amusing was the different reactions the employees had to wearing their Trek paraphernalia. Take the cashier, for example. While she was working on selling me tickets, I noticed that her name tag said, "Commander whatever her name was." So, I thanked her for the tickets.

"Thanks a lot, Commander."

MASSIVE EYE ROLL. "Oh, I hate this."

"I take it you're not a Star Trek fan. This is just a job?"

"No, I am not a Star Trek fan."

Contrast that with the guy who took us up the elevator to the exhibit itself. He was dressed in full regalia, and he was loving it. He even made us say, "Live long and prosper" while giving the Mr. Spock salute before he would let us off the elevator.

The exhibit started slow. We entered a room that had a few original series costumes for the main cast members: Kirk, Spock, McCoy, Scotty. A few props were off in one corner in a display case. We walked around trying to be fascinated. In fact, we really wanted to move onto what we knew was right around the corner.

We moved on, walked up a ramp and through a set of double doors, and entered the bridge of the Enterprise.

Did you read that?

We entered the FREAKIN' BRIDGE OF THE STARSHIP ENTERPRISE!!!!!!

This was a recreation of the set from the original show. The first thing that caught my eye was the viewscreen at the front of the bridge. On it was Earth with the moon in the background.

Next, I saw the big chair. The seat that Captain Kirk occupied while saving the universe countless times.

I had to sit in it.

I stepped down onto the deck, took a few steps, and fulfilled one of my boyhood dreams by parking my rear end in the CAPTAIN'S CHAIR!

Wow. Heady stuff.

For the next half hour or so, we explored the set. Sitting at the various stations. Playing with the buttons. Reading all the displays. We had our picture taken.

It was perfect.

Almost perfect.

The only bad part about it was the dude who was on hand to engage the visitors and tell them all about the TV show. What an annoying chap he was. All I wanted to do was focus on my surroundings. He wanted to talk to me about Star Trek. He asked me a trivia question. I answered it. He was impressed. He asked me another, harder question. I answered it. He kept asking me questions. I wanted to tell him to shut up. He finally left to find out why the sound effects weren't working.

I wonder if other geeks find their nerd brothers annoying.

We left the bridge with the whoosh of one of those magical Trek sliding doors, and we found ourselves in a corridor of the Enterprise from Star Trek: The Next Generation. Opposite us was a window that opened up on a recreation of Captain Picard's quarters. The place was stocked full of props from the show, including two of Picards uniforms, his flute, his desk chair, and a bottle of Chateau Picard, the wine from his family's vineyard in France.

Very kewl.

Next door was a recreation of the Transporter Room from The Next Generation series. A lady from the museum stood behind the console waiting to "beam us down" We piled onto the platfom and took our positions. And we waited.

Nothing happened.

Console lady told us, "Sorry. The computer that does the transporter effect isn't working."

(Note: We weren't expecting to transport anywhere. A computer screen was the only place we were planning on disappering in a flash of sparkly light.)

"Aw, what a ripoff. We want our money back," I complained.

She answered, "Hey pal, you don't want to mess with a finicky transporter."

We laughed and moved on.

The rest of the exhibit showed us models of ships, weapons, costumes, a detailed timeline of Star Trek's future history, and a great big donut called the Guardian of Forever.

What a fun day.

We wrapped things up by buying some photos of ourselves on the sets. And here they are:

Nice Job!

2009-02-15T19:20:00.000-05:00

Ok, so I've been working my new job for a couple of weeks now. How's it going, you ask? Not bad. Not bad at all.

The first three days or so were downright depressing. I found myself, with about two days warning, moved to an entirely different building surrounded by all new people. Not even having any of my office equipment, I limped along through my days with a borrowed laptop. I did a lot of reading. (You know, job related, training stuff.) I took walks. I wondered how things were going with my former co-workers. Even though I was about a mile or so down the road, I felt like I was in an entirely new world.

Then, things began to brighten up. I started to get used to my surroundings. (The cafeteria in my new digs is much better than the old one. Good stuff.) Although my desktop computer and telephone hadn't caught up with me yet, I was starting to move boxes of my personal stuff from my old cubicle at the Credit Company Building. So, my office was beginning to look more familiar. The folks on my new team were nice and were beginning to grow on me. (My new boss is a real trip. High energy with a mind that bounces all over the place. He's hard to keep up with. And he's also a really nice guy. I think I'm going to like working with him.)

Now, two weeks into this gig, my computer and phone are on my desk, I'm used to my new chair, pictures of my family are in their proper places, and I look forward to going to the office in the morning. The work is keeping me hopping, and that's a good feeling. I'm getting things done. I feel like I'm contributing.

As a matter of fact, this job only has one thing that I don't like - meetings. Quite a few more than I had at my old position. But that's ok. I can deal.

Now, if only everyone in the US would decide that they just have to go out and buy a new Ford tomorrow, my job would be absolutely wonderful!

Surprise!!!

2009-01-29T17:04:00.001-05:00

Well, that was pretty unexpected.

I was sittting at my desk watching a webcast of Alan Mullaly addressing Ford employees all over the world. He was discussing our $5.9 billion (That's "billion" with a "b".) loss last year. Suddenly, the instant messenger popped up on my computer screen. It was Gail, my boss' boss.

"Can you come to my office?"

"Be right there," I replied.

Nothing to worry about. No one's getting fired right now. We just cut a bunch of people, and I'm sure they'll give us a little time before the next round of firings. I grabbed my PDA and headed to Gail's office.

I was within sight of her door when I stopped and turned on the voice recorder on my PDA. Hey, you never know. I haven't had a sit down will Gail for months. Who knows what we were going to talk about?

First sign of trouble - My boss, Robin, was already in the office. This is not a good thing. Both of my bosses want to talk to me. Either I'm going to be asked to do something really difficult or I am about to get the shaft.

I'll take the shaft for $500, Wink.

Second sign of trouble - Robin is holding, in his sweaty little hands, a single piece of paper with a lot of highlighting. I don't know what's on it. Gail is likewise holding a copy of the same piece of paper.

"What can I do for you guys?" I ask cheerily.

I sit down. And somewhere behind a 5 mile wide desk, Gail begins reading from a canned speech that she's no doubt delivered to other hapless employees who have occupied this chair.

"Tim, as part of the Way Forward Plan," (Way Forward is the wonderful plan which has resulted in a lot of cost savings for Ford and a lot of unemployment for Michigan.) "your position has been eliminated in our department. I need to stress that you are not being fired. However, I have been required to give up some positions, and yours is one of them."

Gail goes on to tell me about the job I am being forced to move to. I will still be under her boss and in the same department. But Gail will no longer be my boss' boss. She hands me her copy of the paper she's been holding. It's the job description of my new position. She and Robin begin to describe how this new job is actually a great fit for me and a wonderful opportunity. I try to read the piece of paper, but it's apparently written in another language. I can't understand it.

Obviously, this will be a good fit for me.

While Robin and Gail drone on and on, I feverishly scan the description for the one sentence that I am dreading - "This position requires 80 hour weeks and is a lot harder than your current job." I don't see it anywhere. Ok. Maybe it won't be so bad.

"Tim, I think that this job is going to be a good challenge for you."

Great. That means it'll be a 120 hours a week and a set up for failure.

I listened to more positive spin about this great new direction for my life, all the while praying that I could just leave. Finally, after commenting that she didn't know about the timing my move and whether or not the company was going to spend the money necessary to move my work space to the building where my new team sits, Gail ended our conversation.

I left, called my wife, and then sat at my desk trying to wrap my brain around this new turn of events. To be fair, I was forced to move the last time I switched jobs, too. And that had turned out pretty well. So well, in fact, that I'm not happy to be forced to make another move.

But, I am still gainfully employed. That's a good thing. I just hope I stay that way. I've got 20 years here. (Happy Anniversary to me!) I'm getting a little too old to break in a new company.

$5.9 billion????? With a "b"???????

Dude, Why So Quiet???

2009-01-28T17:37:00.000-05:00

OK. Over the past 8 or 9 months one or two people have asked me why I am not blogging anymore. I don't know what's wrong with them, but they miss reading the sick, twisted details of my boring, sad life!

Well, here are two bits of news that anyone who may still visit this barren, lonely corner of cyberspace may want to hear:

#1 - I am back. I'm going to make another go of this because I truly do miss it. I've always like writing, but I've never had the ambition to sit down and try to concoct my attempt at the great American novel. Blogging gives me a fun outlet where I can creatively share news and tidbits about my life without too many people paying attention to me. (That way, if it really stinks, no one knows.)

#2 - I'm going to divulge the real, no holds barred reason why I temporarily gave up on my blog last year. Here it is - the unvarnished truth. (Well, it's a little varnished with some holds barred. For one thing, I'm withholding names to protect the guilty. This is my blog, and in this entry at least, I'm going to write about my perspective on things. I'm not going to descend to name calling or talking badly about other people.)

The truth of the matter is that last Spring, I was hurt really, really badly by someone close to me. This was (I thought) a deep, lasting friendship to which I invested a lot of my time, energy, emotion, etc. And then, one day, it very suddenly, very harshly ended in an unbelievable way at a time when I was going through some very difficult stress and turned to my friend for support. The response that I got was a request to go away and never come back.

I won't share any more than that. I'm sure my friend thought that there were valid reasons to suddenly say, "Never talk to me again. We are through." I don't know what they were. I probably will never know. I can't even imagine anything that would justify such behavior.

To say that I was hurt would be an understatement. I was crushed. Never in my life had I been so disposable in a relationship. Of course, friendships have come and gone, but nothing like this. This was pretty vicious and pretty shocking.

So, I haven't felt like blogging cute little funny stories about my family, my job, and my life. I've been dealing with my wound. Fighting infection. Changing the dressing. Struggling to heal. Doing a lot of thinking. Visiting the Great Physician. (Thank you, Lord. Thank you that You love me forever and will never reject me.) I've learned a lot about myself. About God. About my family and my (real) friends. There are days when I still hurt over what happened. I just can't fathom the type of rejection that I was dealt. But I think I'll come out of this a whole lot wiser than I was going in. I've hated the journey, but God always works things out to our benefit. He always walks with us through the bad times.

Bottom line - Don't worry about it. I am doing ok. Really. Stuff happens and we adapt, heal and move on. In fact, even the last few days have been good in terms of me coming to terms with this. I guess it takes me a while to get over things. But I made two resolutions going into 2009 that I intend to keep to the best of my ability: 1) Draw closer to God than I have ever in my life and 2) Don't let my former friend or anyone else associated with that sorry, hurtful episode steal any more of my joy. I've wasted enough time being hung up on a situation that I'm helpless to change.

Time to move on to a better place.

It Was 20 Years Ago Today...

2008-08-07T23:33:00.001-04:00

Well, actually, it was 20 years ago yesterday, but I can't go back and ask the Beatles to change the song now.

On August 6, 1988, Tim Butler and Rita Markel were joined together in holy matrimony at Holy Cross Church in Marine City, Michigan. It was an insanely hot day. In fact the entire summer was scorching. (Yet, no one was complaining about "global warming.") Despite the heat, it was a bright, beautiful day. I started the day in a hotel with two of my groomsmen. Before we dressed for the ceremony, we went to the local Big Boy and ordered two breakfasts each. (Two servers had to bring us the food.) The church was beautiful. There was time to kill after the ceremony, so we drove around in our limo and stopped by a party my parents hosted at their hotel. The reception was an absolute blast, and I was touched by some of my friends (all of whom I've lost touch with) who journeyed long distances to attend. A couple of days afterwards, Rita and I left for our honeymoon in Gatlinburg, Tennessee.

So, how did we celebrate this momentous occasion? Well, observers would be very disappointed. Yesterday, Rita called me at work to say, "Happy anniversary!" I brought home flowers. Then, we went to our usual Wednesday night hot dog roast and fellowship meeting at Living Word. Rita spilled the beans during the festivities, so the folks in attendance threw together an anniversary song for us.

And that's it....

For now....

Sunday is the real celebration. It probably won't be any different from any other year. We'll exchange gifts. Go out to dinner at Outback Steakhouse. Go for ice cream for dessert. Walk around, hold hands, and reminisce about old times and how happy we are with our marriage and our family.

Nothing extraordinary for number 20. We have some dear friends who also celebrated their 20th anniversary this year, and they spent a long weekend at Lake Michigan, where they honeymooned back in 1988. However, their kids are a bit older than ours, and this afforded them the freedom to take such a trip. We'll be in a much better position to do something amazing and ground breaking for our 25th. Maybe a return to Gatlinburg or a long weekend in the wilds of northern Michigan?

We'll see.......

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Two New Questions

2008-07-24T20:17:00.001-04:00

Signs of the times, but I still find them surprising and a bit unsettling.

Yesterday, when I gave blood at the Red Cross, they asked me a brand new question. Actually, it was a new version of an old question -

"What gender were you when you were born?"

I stared at the nurse blankly for a few seconds. I didn't know what to say. She finally prompted me, "Male...?" Yes, I said. I was born a male. And as near as I can tell, it's been a lifelong habit.

Also, Isaac had a doctor's appointment yesterday. Since it's been a long time since his last visit and he's at a different stage of life now, he had to answer a ton of questions. He shared one of them with me later that evening at church -

"Are you attracted to boys, girls, or both?"

Political correctness grows with no end in sight.

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The Entry With No Name

2008-07-21T22:24:00.001-04:00

Just didn't have a title today. Guess I'm a little dry creatively.

Work is a sad, quiet place these days. Empty offices are everywhere. Today, a couple of guys came by with a cart to collect the phones from all the cubicles that are now empty. I've sent out a couple of e-mails that have come back with errors because the recipients had been fired. We had a meeting Friday morning with our director. The impact on the staff was not lost on her. As a matter of fact, she was quite sympathetic. She gave permission for us to have a "jeans week" this week. (Hey, if you have to wear business casual everyday, you don't know how nice it is to just wear a pair of jeans to work.) Also, she gave told us to do whatever it takes to get ourselves through this crisis. She recommended some down time, a visit to the company psychiatrist, or going out with our teams to see a movie. As strange as that sounds, it was better than our manager, who recommended in a separate e-mail that we might consider leaving the office on time (instead of working late) so we could maximize our time with our families.

Oh well. We're all trying.

This past weekend, I took my four oldest boy on an overnight trip to Higgins Lake. It wasn't a strictly fun getaway. My parents had loaned their house to another family for the 4th of July, and they wanted some assurance that the place had not been trashed. Although the other family had not done a stellar job of cleaning up after themselves, the house was in good shape. So, I didn't have a lot of work to do. We managed to have some fun. The evening we were there we got ice cream and enjoyed a nice fire in the backyard. The next day, I cleaned up the house, and we headed back down state. The boys wanted to swim, but the weather wouldn't permit it. Thunderstorms rolled in off and on all day. (This caused Christopher to comment, "This vacation is NO FUN!!!") At around 5:00 PM, we piled into the car to head back home. Now, this may seem like a happy ending, but it wasn't that simple. In the backseat of my little Focus were 3 tired, over-stimulated boys who couldn't keep their hands to themselves. Next to me behind the wheel was a student driver who was being distracted and irritated by everything that was going on in the backseat.

Man, was I glad to be home!!!

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Man Makes Plans, and God Laughs

2008-07-17T19:10:00.007-04:00

The subject line of this post is a saying that one of my co-workers shared with me at work this morning as we stood around in the hallway and waited to hear if we would be able to keep our jobs. I told him that I thought that "laugh" was a little bit cruel for my tastes. "Chuckled" or "giggled" would have been better.

So, it went down today. The mass firings started at about 8:30 AM. I stayed in touch with my IT comrades in other buildings via IM. They told me that they could stand at the windows and watch the employees filing out to their cars with their boxs full of possessions.

The damage first hit my team at about 9:30. My boss came into my cube, clearly shaken. He had just found out that the person in the cubicle next to mine had been let go. He had showed up for work, and his badge had been deactivated. He found out later that he was gone.

The person sitting on the other side of me also had badge problems in the morning. He would try to find out if he still had a job all day until finally learning at 4:00 PM that he had been fired.

In my old department, a Ford veteran of 27 years was walked to the door.

Through it all, we paced, stood around sharing rumors in the hallways, ate, and tried to keep track of who had been fired. It was very dark. I tried to keep a good humor, cracking wise to make my friends laugh. (One of them thanked me at the end of the day for staying upbeat.) I tried coming up with lines that I would use if I was one of the unfortunate ones getting sacked. Among them were, "No, I'm not Tim Butler. He's already been walked out. I'm just cleaning off his computer," and "Are you from Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes Giveaway?"

The day wore on, and the scariest time was about mid-afternoon. There wasn't much time left to be fired, if it was going to happen. Then the unbelievable, crushing word came down - It had taken longer to sack everyone than they thought it would. The firings were going to have to be extended to Monday. Two more days to endure this. How could they do this? It was inhuman.

We waited it out. Around 4:30, my manager came around. "Go home," she said. "I can't say anything, but just go home." She looked really sad. What was going on? Was our whole department being outsourced and let go? That actually did happen in some cases. What did she know that made her so sad, but she couldn't tell us?

I went back to my desk and packed up to leave for the day. Tomorrow was going to be a sad repeat of this stress filled torture. I noticed a missed call on my phone. Rita had tried to reach me. I called home. Just as she picked up, an e-mail hit my Inbox. I saw the first sentence, and I hung up on her. Reading the e-mail, I couldn't believe my eyes. It was from our CIO. He was announcing that the firings were finished. Everyone who was being let go had been notified.

I had made it. I was going to be able to keep my job for now.

There are no happy people who work in my department tonight. Those of us who managed to keep our jobs are going to miss our co-workers who did not fare as well. It was so sad. Our delusions have been shattered as well. We finished up the Way Forward buyouts earlier this year and 30% of the company had left, and we thought we had seen the end of that type of thing. This was worse. And for those of us who weren't eaten by the sharks this time, the pack of them will probably be back in about 6 months to eat their fill again.

There's no security. Except in God.

Wrapping this up, I want to thank any who were praying for me. And I want to thank God for allowing me to keep my job at Ford. It is a blessing, even though times are tough there. And I know that if I don't make the cut next time or the time after that, He's over all things.

Ford is NOT my provider.

Tomorrow is the Day

2008-07-16T17:47:00.001-04:00

Multiple reliable sources peg tomorrow as "Black Thursday" at Ford ITI. That means that throughout my department, everyone (or almost everyone) who is going to be fired will be let go tomorrow during the day.

Gee, how much work are we going to get done tomorrow?

Only as much as we can while we are constantly looking over our shoulders.

ALL PRAYERS APPRECIATED!!!!

More news as it develops.

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How Bad Are Things at Ford?

2008-07-15T18:55:00.001-04:00

Things are so bad at work right now that instant messaging is becoming a tool to keep track of your friends and make sure they have not been fired. (Or "involuntarily seperated," to use the current corporate lingo.)

One of my friends had a problem yesterday with his badge. It wouldn't work when he showed up for work. His heart skipped a few beats as he dealt with the sudden fear that he had been fired.

Things are not fun.

My sympathies to the folks at GM, who are the latest people to have to suffer a round of staff reductions.

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The Best Laid Plans of Mice, Men, and Tim Butler

2008-07-11T18:19:00.001-04:00

Well, I almost missed a huge opportunity yesterday. Something that I've been looking to do for a while now.

And the reason I almost missed it is because I am selfish.

Thursday nights are typically a welcome respite around our house. Isaac and Olivia attend Youth Group in Ann Arbor. Usually, I am not the one who takes them. Rita or another local Mom who drives that way gives them a lift. That leaves me at home with only the younger kids, who I can make go to bed early with my awesome Dad powers. Then, I get to sit around, relax, have a fire on the patio, listen to some mp3s, etc.

However, last night was one of the rare times that I had to drive to Ann Arbor. No problem. I thought a bit about what I could do while Isaac and Olivia were at church. The weather was warm, so I could walk around. Get myself some ice cream. Do some browsing in some shops. Hit Main Street. Go to a coffee shop.

For the evening, Ann Arbor was my oyster. I could do whatever I wanted.

My grandiose plan began to unravel when Philip asked, "Can I come with you?"

No. You can't.

"But I want to hang out with you."

There will be nothing for you to do.

"I'll do whatever you want to do."

No, I don't even know what I'm going to do.

"I'll bring a book or something."

No.

"Please?"

NO!!!

Whew. That settled that. My "me" time was still a go.

We ate dinner, got ready, and were poised to walk out the door.

That's when it happened.

Rita whispered to me, "You could take him to the Washtenaw Dairy."

(For those of you who are uninitiated, the Washtenaw Dairy is in Ann Arbor and is arguably the best place in southeast Michigan to get ice cream. Around the time that we were married, Rita and I lived a block away from it.)

I scoffed and turned to head to the door. Then, it hit me. Why don't I take him with me? I have a choice here - selfishness or fun with Philip. It's not even a sacrifice. I love spending time with my kids. But all that freedom to just kick back and do what I want to do by myself.....

A growl rose up in my chest, up my throat, and came out of my mouth.

Rita's eyebrows shot up, and she looked surprised.

Philip walked by, and I grabbed his shoulder.

"Get your shoes on. You're coming with me."

He was excited. So was I. I had made the right choice.

We dropped off Isaac and Olivia and headed to the University of Michigan campus. Philip told me, to my surprise, that he had never been here before. So, as we walked around, I told him stories about things that I remembered when I was a student. I showed him where I took my classes and some of the places I like to go in Ann Arbor. We didn't go to the Washtenaw Dairy, but we stopped by Stucchi's. Both of us ordered a big dish of ice cream with peanut butter cups mixed in. We stopped at Borders, and while we were shopping, Philip decided to use all of his cash on hand to buy a book for Nathanael. I was very touched by that gesture.

On the way back to the car, Phil talked to me about his future and what he thought he would like to do. He liked the U of M campus, but he thought that he would like to go to a smaller college. He said that he had no idea what he wants to do when he's older, and I told him that was fine as long as he settled on something he really loved.

It was a fine evening. And I almost missed it.

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Juno

2008-07-10T15:15:00.006-04:00

The Butlers had a full evening last night. Jammed packed with mostly fun stuff.

We started off with a new Bible study curriculum that I'm trying out with the kids. Twelve weeks of Biblical principles and values that they should apply to their lives. Last evening's principle was "Truthfulness." Pretty solid, right? Well, it went pretty well. The program is called, "Learning From Dad," and is available here. It's written by a gentleman named Mally, who's had some good outcomes raising his own children, as you can see if you go to the web site.

As I said, things went pretty well. The kids were pretty squirmy, maybe due to the time of day. (Around 6:00 PM and before supper.) But I got some good participation. The only thing that I found personally frustrating was some of the questions and distractions. The older kids seemed to want to pull the discussion off point several times. The feeling of not really knowing what I was doing and having to fight to keep things on target got me a little flustered at times.

After the study, we headed out to Living Word for our mid-week gathering around the church firepit. Good friends, hot dogs, pop, chips, and smores. A really fun time for everyone. I continue to be happily surprised and blessed by how wonderful this new church is.

We got home around 10:00 PM. The younger half of the family was immediately sent to bed, and the rest of us (Rita, Isaac, Olivia, and me) settled in to watch a movie that we had rented earlier in the week - Juno. We were a bit apprehensive with letting the kids in on this, but we had heard that the movie was good and, despite the mature subject matter, had some good values. Besides, Isaac really wanted to see it. So, we trusted that, with our TV Guardian filtering out the saltier language and our teens armed with the best sex education Rita and I could provide, we began this two hour journey into a tale of teen pregnancy.

Warning - Spoilers for the movie follow. If you haven't already seen Juno, you may want to close your browser now.

On the plus side, we all agreed that Juno was a well-acted movie with a witty script. Ellen Page, the young actress who played the title role of Juno, a teen girl who finds herself with child after an ill-conceived (no pun intended) sexual encounter with her best male friend, was outstanding in the role. Similarly, the rest of the cast was excellent in their performances. The people were essentially likeable, with the exception of Jason Bateman's character, a thirty something married man who decides that he wants to leave his wife and get an apartment "in the city" where he and Juno can have a romance. (Yes, that essentially makes him a pedophile.) After a brief consideration of abortion as a way to solve her dilemma, Juno opts to have her baby and give him up for adoption to a yuppie couple, played by the aforementioned Bateman and Jennifer Garner. (Hence, the film's good rep among conservatives for having a pro-life theme.) As I said, the script is very witty, with Juno and her Dad receiving the best of the excellent dialogue. Lines like, "Pregnancy makes me need to pee like Seabiscuit," (spoken by Juno to the refined, yuppie couple) had us laughing out loud. The tender subject of teen sex was treated appropriately, with the one encounter depicted in the movie (between Juno and her friend) being shown briefly, in fleeting images of implied nudity, and not glorified whatsoever. This was a refreshing change. In just about every other movie I've seen, the only sex that's not glorious is between married people.

On the negative side of the street, we were confused by the movie. What was the point? Juno has her baby and gives him up for adoption. The final scene shows her sitting in the front yard with her friend (now her boyfriend, as the two declared their love for each other during Juno's pregnancy). The two sing a song to each other and then share a passionate kiss. After we turned the movie off, I asked, "Are they still having sex?" Isaac shrugged and said, "I guess they are." "Then," I declared, "The characters have learned nothing from their experience." After enduring the pain of an unwanted teen pregnancy, Juno and her boyfriend are repeating the same mistakes that they just got done paying for. They did not grow at all during the film. Even more frustrating, their parents reveal themselves to be complete idiots, allowing their kids to fall into temptation all over again. Very disappointing. Also, Juno's decision to go forward with allowing Vanessa (Garner) to adopt her baby even after she separates from her husband gives the implied message that Dads aren't necessary. (Although, I do have to say that maybe it was for the best, considering what a creepy dude her husband turned out to be.) Lastly, despite my previous comments about the sensitive handling of the subject matter, some of the more sexually oriented dialogue had Rita and me squirming in our seats as we listened to it in the presence of our teens.

Overall, Juno was a decent slice of life movie that dealt with a tender theme in a thoughtful manner. For our teens, it modeled good relationships between parents and kids as Juno and her family went through her ordeal in a mostly healthy and supportive manner. However, the morally ambiguous nature of the movie and the lack of development of the characters left us cold.

Thumbs up if you like this kind of drama, but it definitely has its problems.

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After Action Report: Fourth of July Weekend

2008-07-09T16:03:00.001-04:00

What a great holiday we had!!! A lot of fun throughout the weekend, but we were sure tired by the end.

The holiday got off to a great start on July 3. My boss sent us all home early to get a jump on the weekend, so I left Dearborn and headed over to the Plymouth Super Center, a gas station on Ann Arbor Road in Plymouth. Our new church, Living Word, was sponsoring a "gas buy down" to bless the community. As a congregation, we ponied up $3000 to lower the price by $.30 a gallon. We enabled the station to sell 10,000 gallons of gas for $3.89. It was a huge success, with people lining up an hour in advance for their cheap gas. We had a lot of fun, and we blessed a lot of people. The media was out in force, with a traffic copter, photographers, and camera crews from three stations being on hand. The coverage from WXYZ can be seen here.

The next day, we had plans to spend the holiday with our dear friends, the Carlsons. They live on a homestead outside of Saline. We arrived in the early afternoon and stayed until way too late for our own good. We were all tired by the time we left. It was a great day. We grilled delicious food, enjoyed the peaceful country setting, and had our own fireworks after dark. Lots of fun times. I really appreciate these wonderful friends, especially during a year when some friendships that seemed solid came to sudden and difficult conclusions. In a world where it's sometimes hard to depend on people, the Carlsons are incredibly devoted and caring. We love them.

The next day brought another meal with friends. This time, it was with Kevin and Jackie Grim at our house. Although it was the day after the Independence Day holiday, we wanted to have a barbeque with burgers and dogs for our pals. Unfortunately, our much abused grill had given up the ghost last year. A few days earlier, I had pulled it apart and made a list of parts I would need to fix it up. I expected the price to be around $40. I was shocked when it turned out to be twice that. Considering I could almost buy a new grill for that amount, we decided to replace instead of repair. So, Saturday morning, Rita and I struck out for Lowe's to purchase our new grill. I was hoping that we would be able to buy one assembled as I didn't want to be under the gun to put it together before the Grims arrived. Sure enough, we found exactly the one we wanted, and it fit pretty nicely in our van. Mission accomplished!

The Grims showed up a couple of hours later, and I happily grilled a huge helping of hamburgers, dogs, and brats on my new, huge, three burner grill. Dessert was a birthday cake baked by Olivia for Kevin. Fun! Well, the rest of our visit was pleasant, but I found that the Grims looked as tired as we felt. Both of our families played hard the day before, and it wasn't too long after the meal that Kevin and Jackie made their farewells.

The rest of Saturday and all day Sunday developed into down time. We laid around, watched TV, read, talked, and napped.

It was truly a great weekend!!! Wish they were all this good!

College Boy

2008-07-02T11:00:00.001-04:00

Yesterday was a milestone in our 12 year homeschooling journey.

Isaac had a long anticipated interview with an admissions counselor at Schoolcraft College. Although he's still in high school, we know that he's going to have to have some accomplishments that make him stand out when he applies for college in a couple of years. College course work was something that we thought would serve him well, not only from the standpoint of admission to a university but also from getting practical experience in a classroom setting. That's something of which he's had almost nothing.

I didn't attend the meeting. My job was to sit at my desk and pray.

According to Rita and Isaac, the interview was quick. They were pleased that the counselor seemed equipped and used to dealing with homeschooled students. He asked if we had any transcripts or standardized tests. No, we didn't have any of those. (I am about to begin work on generating transcripts for our high school students. I'm behind the curve as far as Isaac is concerned. We have never done standardized tests. Rita and I just haven't worried about them. Our high and mighty homeschool philosophy has always been that we didn't need them. Our kids were getting educated in what WE thought was important. Who cares what other people think they should know? Gulp. Time to come down from the clouds and be more practical.) Isaac was told that he would have to take a placement test before his admission would be considered. The test would take about 1.5 hours to complete. Isaac has never taken this type of a test before. It's a diffent experience doing your science quiz at home sitting on your bed and listening to your iPod. The counselor was generous and offered to let Isaac come back on a later day to take the test. He seemed a little nervous but said that he might as well get it over with.

Rita called me while he was taking the exam. She was relaxed about it. If he did well, it was validation and a big achievement. If he did poorly, well then...... he should have listened to us when we warned him about not being serious with his studies. I wasn't so nonchalant about it. This was a big deal. The first real test of how we were homeschooling. Many of our friends have youth who are either wrapping up or have finished their high school years. For the most part, they are excellent students with promising futures. Will Isaac fare as well? What if he doesn't? No college? Is he going to live in my basement for the rest of his life? YIKES!!!!

I got the call a few hours later. Isaac had done very well on his placement exam. He killed on Reading Comprehension and Language, placing at the college level in those areas. He did not do as well at Math, placing below his grade level. (Not surprising since this is one of his struggle areas. He and I are going to be working on his algebra together this summer. He also told me later that many of the questions on the test used mathematical notation that he wasn't used to and didn't understand. Later in the exam, he figured out what they were trying to ask him, but he had already gotten many of the problems wrong.) However, his placement test results were good enough for the counselor to offer him admission to Schoolcraft on the spot.

Isaac selected two classes to take this Fall - a beginning computer programming class and an English composition class.

We are so proud, so relieved, so happy. Congratulations, Isaac. Well done! I'm also very happy for Rita, who after years of sacrifice and effort, has produced a college student. Excellent!!!

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The INCH Report

2008-05-07T20:03:00.001-04:00

Time for me to get back to some blogging, and I can't think of a better subject. This past weekend, Isaac, Olivia, and I attended the 25th annual INCH Homeschooling Convention in Lansing. Overall, the weekend was fabulous. The kids were great company (I hope I was, too!), and the convention was very inspiring. I came home on fire to be the best homeschooling dad around.

Here are the details.......

Isaac and I left Wayne around 1:30 to head to Lansing. We were late, and I was a little grouchy about it. The first workshops started at 2:45, and it didn't look like we were going to make it. (We didn't.) Liv had gone on ahead early in the morning because she was participating in the All-State Honors Concert that evening, and she had rehearsals stacked up all day.

When we pulled into downtown Lansing, we found the place torn up by construction. Finding a parking spot turned into a bit of a frustrating challenge. We finally found a way to get to our usual parking garage by trial and error, trying different streets until we found one that was construction free.

From there, things went very well. We entered the Lansing Center to the usual sweet smell of roasted chestnuts, the official snack food of homeschooling conventions in Lansing. We had missed the first workshop, so we used the time to browse the vendor room and hook up with some old friends who we typically only see once a year at this gathering. Everything was outstanding. Isaac and I even found a free wifi hotspot, so we were busy checking our e-mail and surfering the web with our mobile devices while we were walking through the convention.

The concert that evening was SPECTACULAR. I was so proud. All of the kids, including Olivia, had been hand picked by their conductors to participate in this all-state group. The master of ceremonies told us, "The kids up here are the best homeschooled musicians in the state of Michigan." Wow. Very impressive. Liv's choir had about 30 young people in it. The music was great and the presentation perfect. All the kids performed beautifully. My only beef during the entire concert was when the final group, the orchestra, went long and the concert went overtime. People started arriving in the auditorium for the evening's keynote address. They made no effort to be quiet, talking loudly and noisily walking through the hall. I was so angry. These kids had worked hard, and they deserved better than to have to compete with the parents that were there.

After the concert, we ducked out of the keynote and went to check into our hotel. Unfortunately, our reservation had been totally messed up. I was booked into a smoking room at the full rate, instead of the conference discount. The woman behind the counter told me that there was nothing she could do because the hotel was completely sold out for the night. BLAST! On the plus side, she immediately gave me the cheaper rate to try to pacify me.

It worked. I'm a total cheapskate.

We dumped our stuff in the room, which smelled like the bottom of a hamster cage, and went to dinner at TGI Fridays. Cheeseburgers and fries all around!!! An hour later, we returned to our room, bloated and stuffed with heavy, greasy burgers.

Unfortunately, we found absolutely nothing to watch on TV and decided to turn in. Suddenly, I was faced with a moment that I had been dreading for days. A very dire situation that required a bit of courage and fortitude to face. Question: How do you know when your little boy has grown up and is now a young man? Answer: When you don't want to share a bed with him.

Queue the sinister music.

I had spent days trying to figure out a way to get a bed all to myself in our two bed, three person room. Nothing I could come up with worked. So, Isaac and I were going to have to sleep in the same bed for one night.

He wasn't any happier about it than I was. He told me that he intended to sleep on the floor. I said to him that he didn't have to do that and we would handle things just fine. It was only for one night.

Gulp.

Next to us, Olivia stretched out luxuriously in her own, wonderfully solitary bed. Isaac and I prepared to hit the sheets. We changed, brushed our teeth, and said good night to our handheld electronic devices. This was terrible. No wonder Gilligan and the Skipper chose to remain fully dressed in those hammocks while they were stranded on the island.

Insanity.

Lunacy.

We opened the bed, took a deep breath, and climbed in. No turning back.

To be honest, Isaac wasn't a bad sleeping partner. It was a queen size bed, so there was lots of room. He only crossed into my territory two or three times, and a quick kick sent him scurrying back to his own side. All in all, I thought it went very well. (Although I wasn't pleased when we arrived back home, and Isaac and Rita exchanged strategies for stopping my snoring during the night.)

The next morning, we were up early. We bailed on the Holiday Inn, had breakfast at Denny's, and returned to the convention. The workshops were inspiring and motivated me greatly. Many of the topics seemed to focus on parenting teenagers and raising morally pure children. Those themes definitely ministered to me. I attended meetings on "Dad's Role in the Homeschool", "How to Have a Homeschooling Marriage That Doesn't Merely Survive", and "Raising Pure Daughters in a Dark Generation." I called Rita and told her that I was going to attend a session called, "Encouraging the Homeschooling Mom." She told me that she didn't think I needed it. I proceeded to brag to everyone about what a great husband I am.

I left the conference feeling both blessed and convicted about the job I am doing as a Dad. For the past few days, I've been listening to my conference CDs and trying my best to be a better parent!!!!

And of course, it goes without saying the I dropped a bundle of cash in the vendor room. As usual.

When I returned home, I told Rita that one thing that had stuck me was that the other parents in attendance had been "our people." They share our convictions, follow our God, are raising their children in the same manner that we are, and generally have the same values that we do. I felt so at home among them. I would love it if INCH took place once a month instead of once a year. If I could find where these families go to church, we would be there every Sunday.

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Quick Update

2007-10-22T09:22:00.000-04:00

Yes, I've fallen off of the blogging wagon again. Please excuse my silence. Things have been pretty crazy. Just a brief update today. However, some things are brewing in my life that I'm not going to be able to keep to myself, so please check back here again in the future for additional crazy chapters in my life!

Rehearsals for A Christmas Carol are proceeding quickly. We are about half done with blocking the second act. The set pieces and props are coming together. Not only are we rehearsing our scenes, but we're practicing scene changes. As there are about 40 people in the cast, our director, Angie, sees no reason to have additional people backstage to handle the changing of scenes. So, the actors are taking care of that as well. The children are doing a great job, and Nathanel's Tiny Tim is going to be so cute! Hard to believe, but we are coming up on about a month away from Tech Week!!! Wow!

I'm radically behind in my Christmas prep this year. Usually about this time, I'm finished with stocking stuffers and onto purchasing gifts for the extended family and some for our own children. Oh well. Looks like all the work is going to take place in November. Maybe I'll blog a bit more extensively this year about the extreme measures a Christmas fanatic (That would be me!) takes to prepare for the holiday!

Monday Morning Blues

2007-10-01T10:16:00.000-04:00

Not much lately, especially today. Trying to get back on track after having to spend a major portion of the weekend dealing with hurt and disappointment from a very unexpected source. Ah, life's little surprises......

So, I'm starting out my week being very thankful for my lovely wife, who is someone that I know I can ALWAYS depend on when I'm down. One thing I'm especially grateful for is that when we are both disappointed, we always draw closer together and comfort each other. We spent a lot of time yesterday talking and holding each other.

Also, I'm thankful for my parents, who once again proved to me over the weekend that I can always depend on them when I manage to wander into a situation that I can't handle. (Not the same disappointing situation discussed above!) Forty-three years old and the folks are still standing by me and bailing me out! Thanks, Mom and Dad for all the love and support you show me, Rita, and the kids on a continual basis. We love you!!!!

The Butlers of Springfield

2007-09-26T15:32:00.000-04:00

Usually, I don't go in for this sort of thing, but I found out about this fun web site on a blog that I read several times a week. It's a promotional site put up by Burger King to publicize the Simpsons Movie. Basically, you upload a photo of yourself to the site, and their conversion software turns you into a character from the Simpsons.

So, without further ado, here's what I would look like if I were a character on that popular animated show. (Of course, my faithful dog, Walker, would always be at my side.)

Below is me taking Walker for a stroll past the famous Kwik-E-Mart in Springfield. Note that that we're being followed quite closely by a really nosey, annoying Burger King logo.

If you want to see yourself as a Simpson's character, check it out at Simpsonize Me!!

A Carol Begun

2007-09-19T13:19:00.000-04:00

Monday night was our first meeting and read through as the cast of A Christmas Carol. There were upwards of 40 people on the stage. It was our first opportunity to see who had been cast in which roles. Of course, the part that we were most interested in was Scrooge. The only thing that I knew for sure is that I had not been given the role.

The gentleman's name is Art. He and I had read for Scrooge together, and our approaches were markedly different. I wanted Scrooge to be a gruff, grumpy guy but I wanted to be careful to avoid caricature. I wanted to play him like a real guy. As a result, I suspect that my performance went off as a bit on the boring side. Art, however, threw himself into it, playing Scrooge as over-the-top nasty. Guess whose approach was the correct one?

I couldn't be happier for Art. While we were reading together during the audition, he confided in me that he had not been in acting for quite a long time. He told me that he's always loved A Christmas Carol, and Scrooge is a part he's always wanted to play. All that, plus the fact that I'm happier playing Cratchet, makes me extremely grateful for Angie's (the director) choices.

So, we all read our parts on Monday evening. I was surprised actually at how little Cratchet gets to say. However, I'll be on stage quite a bit. And it's going to be a blast. The kids did really well, too. Nathanael, especially, is going to make a wonderful Tiny Tim.

Last night, I went by myself up to the theater for my first blocking rehearsal. (Cratchet appears in the opening scene in Scrooge's office. Nothing for the kids to do yet.) Angie's a very kinetic director. During blocking, she stood on stage with us and moved through the scenes with us. She's also fun and runs a very relaxed rehearsal. Another thing that I enjoy about her is her resourcefulness. The stage upon which this play is going to be performed is incredibly small. We're talking seriously tiny. She explained to us how scene changes and staging were going to be handled in this limited environment. It all sounded really cool.

Towards the end of rehearsal, Angie caught me for a minute or two of private conversation that really made my day. She practically gushed about our family and told me how she thought of us a gift. A family that just dropped into her lap and who were perfect to play the Cratchets. She also told me exactly how I got the part. And now, it can be revealed - How I won the coveted role of Bob Cratchet. The scene I was given to read was the juiciest one for old Bob. It takes place in Christmas Future after the death of Tiny Tim. It's a real tear jerker. And the clincher for me was - I actually wept during the audition. I cried. Quite a bit in fact. When I came off the stage, Angie met me on the stairs, cupped my face in her hands, and said, "WOW!" Last night, she told me that after that audition, she knew that she had her Bob Cratchet.

As busy as the coming weeks are going to be, this is going to be a lot of fun!

Very Exciting News

2007-09-13T13:21:00.000-04:00

Well, our big news arrived sooner than I thought. But it's all good!

Monday night after we returned from vacation, the Community Theater Group in Wayne was holding open auditions for A Christmas Carol. Olivia, Philip, and Nathanael all wanted to go to try out. It didn't take much effort on their part to convince me to take them. As a bonus, I thought it would be fun if I auditioned with them.

We showed up at the State Wayne Theater on Monday evening. The tryouts went very well for all of us. Angie, the director, told us that we were welcome and encouraged to come back the next night and read again as it couldn't hurt to be up in front of the production staff as often as possible. So, we all went back on Tuesday night. By the time we were done on Tuesday, we had a pretty strong feeling that we were being considered for various members of the Chratchet family.

Callbacks were Wednesday night, and after we got home on Tuesday, we received a phone call inviting us all back the following evening. Needless to say, we were delighted and enthusiastic.

The next night, we returned to find that we really didn't have much to do. It was obvious that Angie was still considering the kids for the Cratchet roles, but it eventually dawned on me that I had been called back only because the kids were. I read only a couple of times for Scrooge, but it was mainly to help out other actors that were being considered for other parts. I was kind of a designated actor, sitting in when someone needed a person to read with. This was either very good (meaning Angie already knew which part I was getting) or very bad (meaning I wasn't going to get cast). Before we broke up for the night, Angie told us that if we had received roles, we would be called by 8:00 PM Thursday night.

We all went home, excited and a little bit nervous. I was mostly afraid that some but not all of the kids would be selected. I REALLy hated the idea of tackling that disappointment. We had experienced something similar when both Olivia and Philip had auditioned for Peter Pan.

About 45 minutes after we arrived home, the phone rang. I didn't recognize the number, and I felt a little excited and nervous as I picked it up. It was Angie. Although she had said she wouldn't call until the next night, she wanted to tell us the news right away. We had all been cast as the Cratchet clan. I received the role of Bob Cratchet, Scrooge's perpetually put upon clerk. Olivia was awarded the role of Belinda Cratchet, Philip was cast as Peter Cratchet, and last but certainly not least, Nathanel was given the all-important part of Tiny Tim.

Wow. I'm still shocked and delighted by this marvelous news!!!!

God bless us! Every one!!!

Vacation Wrap Up

2007-09-12T15:42:00.000-04:00

I knew it was only a matter of time before I fell off of the "Blogging My Entire Vacation on a Daily Basis" bandwagon. However, it wasn't because I got too tired or lost my creative energy.

It was simply because there was nothing to blog about.

Our vacation ended with a whimper, not a bang. We hung around the lake house a lot. We ate ice cream. We watched TV. We sat around some fires.

That's about it. The kids were a little bored, but Rita and I were highly relaxed.

The wrap up - Vacation 2008 was very restful and very nice.

Now, as soon as we got home on Monday evening, the Butlers immediately got another iron in the fire. Watch this space over the next two or three days for a special announcement. It's going to be exciting stuff!

(At least for us!)

Vacation Days 7 and 8 - Ups and Downs

2007-09-08T18:36:00.000-04:00

As I mentioned yesterday, we journeyed to Borne Mountain Resort in order to spend about 5 hours at the water park there. We had an absolute blast. Rita and I took turns watching Aidan and Christopher in the kiddie pool. Both of them were willing to try some of the bigger rides, but they mainly stuck to the less intimidating portions of the park. For my part, I hung out with the older kids a lot. We had a lot of fun playing on a log in the biggest pool. Isaac and I went on some slides together, and Nathanael and I did some racing. It was really nice watching the kids kind of pair off and go in their own directions. Except for the littlest ones, they didn't really need us watching them every second.

Man, were we tired when we got home. And we were sore. Well, okay - I was sore. Motrin is a beautiful thing.

Today, we're sticking close to the lake house and relaxing. We took a walk down by the lake, but that's about it. Right at this moment, I'm typing this while I'm watching my beloved Wolverines getting destroyed by Oregon.

Ouch! Well, vacation can't be all fun!

Vacation Day 6 - What a Downer

2007-09-07T12:47:00.000-04:00

No entry yesterday because nothing happened! At least, not much.

We spent all morning lazing around the house. In the afternoon, Olivia and I went to Prudenville to visit a gift shop and do some grocery shopping. Meanwhile, Rita took the rest of the kids and Walker swimming in the lake.

Later that evening, we went to Nibbles for ice cream and got home in time to gather around the TV set for the two hour season finale of one of our video guilty pleasures - the SciFi Channel's Who Wants To Be A Superhero?

It's raining today, so we've spent the day so far indoors. However, later this afternoon, we're heading north to the indoor water park at Boyne Mountain.

More later.....

Vacation Day 5 - Mackinac

2007-09-05T23:52:00.000-04:00

Man, are we all tired.

Today, we made our annual trek to Mackinac and Michigan's Upper Pennisula. In addition to the usual horde of Butler's, we brought alone the most excitable dog in the world, Walker. We managed to get out during the morning hours, but our arrival at the Straits was delayed by the inevitable stop at Sea Shell City, tourist trap extraordinare.

Our first stop in Mackinaw City was the park right on Lake Huron, where we ate a picnic lunch within sight of the Mackinac Bridge. Various sandwiches and milk were on the menu, and the seagulls pretty much left us alone. In fact, they were hardly the most difficult form of animal life that we had to contend with.

Walker was much worse. Everytime the kids wandered away to skip stones or explore the beach, he went nuts. We finally just took him back to the car.

After that we decided that Tahquamenon Falls was the vacation destination for us. So we crossed the bridge to the Upper Pennisula. However, before heading to the Falls, we took a brief side trip to the latest attraction in St. Ignace - The Weird Michigan Wax Museum. We sincerely wondered if this was a place we should go. The brochure promised murder, mayhem, hauntings, etc. Potentially scary stuff. But the kids were intrigued and the adults were somewhat curious, too. So, we decided to risk it, agreeing that any child that was too weirded out by the displays could be pulled from the joint.

When we pulled up, there were two things that were obvious at once - this place was brand spanking new and we were the only ones there. A young man who turned out to be the owner took our money. He told us that he had been in business for three months and was doing well. He told us that we could take our time and enjoy the many displays of wax figures awaiting us. We went in.

What followed was about a dozen scenes from Michigan history and lore in a single darkened hallway. To say that it was intriguing would have been to overstate matters. To say that it was fun may have been acurrate. (We had a lot of fun laughing at the cheesey displays.) To say that it was educational would have been stretching things to the breaking point. Needless to say, we witnessed recreations of such iconic moments in Michigan history as the Snake Princess of Belle Isle, the Soop Cemetary Hauntings, the Bearded Baseball Team, The Wooden Leg Killer of Grand Rapids, the Civil War Soldier who was actually a Michigan Woman, The Dog Man of Michigan (pictured below), and the Melonheads.

That's right. Melonheads.

Still not sure about that one.

Vowing never to return, we turned the call toward Tahquamenon Falls. Just north of St. Ignace, the first sign we saw told us that we had over an hour to drive. Yikes. We debated for about 15 minutes, and since it was already 4:00 PM, we decided to retreat back to Mackinaw City. There, we ate at Audies, bought fudge, and did a little bit of shopping.

Then, we jumped back into the car and returned to Higgins Lake.

Which brings me back to the beginning of this entry. We are all bushed.

More tomorrow. Good night all.......

Vacation Day 4 - Call of the Mild

2007-09-04T23:23:00.000-04:00

This morning brought more downtime. Rita started cutting hair, and the rest of us settled in for some reading, TV watching, game playing, etc. For myself, I grabbed the TV in the back bedroom and settled in to watch a movie on Lifetime. Ah, Lifetime - television for women. It's hard to believe that you could create an entire 7x24 cable network dedicated to women being abused, oppressed, neglected, taken for granted, endangered, etc. And getting even with the men who put them through this torture. This morning, I watched a docu-drama called, Death of a Cheerleader. All I can tell you is that Kellie Martin killed Torrie Spelling in retribution for Torrie doing something really awful to Kellie. Kellie went to jail for what she did, but not before pointing out the moral of the story - it's our paternalistic, male dominated society that caused Torrie's death. Kellie's just another victim.

Sigh.

Since the forecast called for thunderstorms in the afternoon, we decided to go indoors for our fun. We drove to Gaylord and made of annual vacation visit to Call of the Wild. (Or, Call of the Mild, as we say.) It's the premiere collection of stuffed animals in the midwest. For some reason, the kids always love it. It only takes about 15 minutes to go through the museum, but they're always enthusiastic. We also spend quite a bit of time in the gift shop, which is first rate.

Before leaving, one of the ladies working at Call of the Mild told us of a place up the road where we could check out a herd of elk. They were fenced in, but the kids would have no problem coaxing the elk to the fence with offers of grass to eat. Even though it was raining a bit, we went. Not only were there a large number of elk but a fair share of deer in the herd. As promised, both the deer and the elk came right up to the fence to eat out of our hands. The children were delighted.

Burritos for dinner, and Rita gave me a long overdue haircut. Now, I wouldn't normally mention this except for the...... unusual nature of this haircut. Everything was going just ducky for me and my head. Rita did her usual good job. She thinned my hair, lowered my ears, trimmed my sideburns. The works. I checked the mirror to see what I looked like. Not bad at all. She was just finishing up by shaving my neck with the electric clippers when she decided to go after some stray hairs on the back of my head.

rrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrr

She gasped and said, "Oh no." Isaac and Olivia ran over, checked out the back of my head, and started laughing hysterically. Rita couldn't stop apologizing. Philip came out of the shower, and Isaac whispered something to him. Then he ran around behind me, saw the back of my head, and started laughing.

&*$%!#

Liv loaned me a mirror so I could check out the back of my head. Well, I made a joke of it at first, complaining that Rita had given me a huge bald spot right on top. But there was no denying the true damage. Man, having a big bald head is bad enough. I mean, it doesn't really bug me, but I don't dig it either. But now, my big bald spot has a little friend.

Oh well. I got my money's worth for the haircut. (No pictures. Sorry. I'm not vain, but I'm not THAT easy going either.)

Vacation Day 3 - Canoing

2007-09-03T21:55:00.000-04:00

For the entire morning, I was afraid that we were experiencing our second down day of the vacation. No one seemed to want to do anything. We sat around, ate breakfast, and watched TV. TLC was having a Labor Day Marathon of a show that we really enjoy, Little People, Big World. We watched episode after episode while the morning slipped away.

However, after lunch, the day picked up. We decided to drive to Roscommon and rent canoes for the afternoon. Rita and most of the kids had done this last year and had had a fabulous time. Now, we were all going to make a go of it.

We almost didn't all make it. Christopher, who always struggles with new experiences, was nervous about canoing from the get go. He announced before we left home that he refused to participate. We all tried our best to encourage him. I chose to buddy up to him, telling him that I wouldn't let anything harm him and that I would be his canoe partner for the day.

As we drove to the canoe livery, rented our boats, and were driven by the owner to the launch site, Chris became increasingly nervous and upset. Finally, the first boat was in the water, and it was time for me, Philip, and Christopher to climb aboard. I put on Christopher's life jacket, and the stress of the situation finally reached the boiling point. He screamed, cried, and threw himself down on the ground. I begged and pleaded with him to get up, but he kept on crying. I picked him up and tried to explain to him how we could climb into the boat without any trouble. He was inconsolable. Finally, Rita decided that she, Aidan, and Olivia would take the first boat. She hoped that seeing Aidan having a grand time would help Chris out. No dice. He didn't care. He simply wasn't going to get into the boat. He was making such a scene that I was truly getting embarrassed and I considered backing out of the whole thing.

Then Rita had a brain storm. She suggested that we swap Christopher for Aidan in her boat. Since she was already in the river, it would be easy to do. She paddled over to the edge of the river, and I lifted Aidan out of the boat. Christopher carried on more violently than ever, but I ignored him. I picked him up and lowered him into the canoe. Then they took off, Chris complaining all the way.

Aidan, Philip, and I jumped into our canoe and followed quickly. By the time we caught up, Chris had settled down and was beginning to enjoy himself. By the end of the journey, he was a huge fan of canoing.

The trip was wonderful. We even pulled our boats to the bank of the river at one point so the kids could wade and play. (Mom and Dad took a much needed break.) Philip and I were the master boatsmen, finishing the course well in advance of the other canoes. We all had fun but agreed that we would no doubt be sore tomorrow.

After a very nice dinner of chicken alfredo, we went out for ice cream at our favorite place, Nibbles. Returning to the lake house, we put the younger children to bed over a family read-a-loud and settled in for some Yahtzee!

Vacation Day 2 - Steady and Slow

2007-09-02T20:37:00.000-04:00

Despite our best intentions, today turned out to be our first down day of the vacation. After going to church and hearing a pretty convicting sermon about preparing ourselves for the end times, we came home and just hung out.

Originally, we had planned an outing to a local petting zoo, but we just didn't have it in us. After we got out of our church clothes, the TV went on, and we were soon engrossed in nature programs and news specials. The kids did this and that, and before we knew it, 4:00 PM had rolled around. Too late to do anything really.

This evening, we had a hot dog roast and visited our favorite ice cream place, Nibbles.

Here are some pictures:

Vacation Day 1 - The Beginning

2007-09-01T21:37:00.000-04:00

Finally, life has slowed to some kind of reasonable pace, and I can now fit in a little bit of writing on the side. At last! I've missed writing my thoughts down on this site. I'm more than ready to get back into it. What better place to start than the Butler family vacation!

Actually, our annual vacation to Northern Michigan officially kicked off yesterday. We had intended to start things out right with our usual dinner of fat burgers at Miller's Bar in Dearborn. I got off of work early (as usual for a long weekend) and decided to use the time to good advantage. I took our van to a local Quick Lube for an oil change and tire rotation. Three hours later, I was pulling out of the parking lot. (Insert your own joke about "quick" oil changes here.) The kids were starving, Dearborn was a half hour away, and we surely had at least an hour's wait at Miller's for the best cheeseburgers in the world. We decided to go for greasy, fatty food closer to home. We went to Culvers, which is 5 minutes away and guaranteed to satisfy our glutenous urges. We weren't disappointed.

I'm so ashamed.

We dragged our over-fed bellies home and spent the rest of the night packing for the journey.

Up early the next day, I walked with the dog for exercise. (HA! What a joke. The fat burger was still sitting in my stomach. I was completely full from the day before's dinner. But as you're about to find out, that didn't slow me down much.) We all got dressed and went for breakfast at Golden Corral in Westland. This is a joint that must be experienced by all. For about $40, my family of eight was unleashed in the land of all you can eat paradise. Made to order omelets, french toast, pancakes, waffles, donuts, cereals, cookies, and candies followed.

It was a grand feast.

Below is a picture of Nathanel and Aidan finishing up their meals. If you look carefully, you will notice that the bowl they're eating out of is full of candy. That plus the pop and ice cream they ate the night before would ultimately come back to cause me some major problems.

What were we thinking?

We hit the road shortly after that. For those of you who have not experienced the joy of making a car trip with a family of eight, I thought of giving you a comprehensive narrative of the journey. But to tell you the truth, nothing happened. No one threw up. No one wet their pants. No one fell out of the van. We only had to stop to go to the bathroom once.

The sugar did kick in. But that story is just too frustrating to tell.

We made a couple of stops. Rita wanted to go to Pinconning to get some top notch cheese. We went, but didn't stay long. The store we picked was full of delectable cheeses, including cream cheese and chocolate cheese. It was also staffed by some older ladies who get a little grumpy with kids who get too interested in the cheese and other foods they were selling. (It didn't help when Christopher picked up a sausage about as big as he was and threatened to shoot me with it.) Here's what it looked like:

Later, we stopped at the outlet stores in West Branch so that we could buy some church shoes for Than and some....... unmentionable undergarments for Rita. (Look, I don't blog about stuff like that in public, okay?????) Things got too dicey when the kids had a sugar induced bad behavior meltdown and all the boys (including me) ended up back in the van while the ladies wrapped up the shopping.

And here we are!!! Safely at the lake. We had pizza for dinner. Then Rita went grocery shopping while I bathed the kids. Now, we're winding down with a little TV, some games, and some snacking.

Stay tuned. I'll try to provide an update everyday of what we're up to.......

That's Different

2007-03-29T08:39:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, when I got home from work, I found that my delightfully quirky children were watching Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith in French with English subtitles. I have no idea why they were doing this.

Two things occurred to me: It was pretty funny listening to Darth Vader speak French, and I wondered if this would count as homeschooling foreign language credit.

NAH! Even I couldn't go that far.

A Thousand and One Uses for a Photocopier

2007-03-21T11:15:00.000-04:00

Well, I suppose it had to happen sooner or later.

A few years back, when Ford was doing well and profit sharing checks were really something to write home about, I bought Rita a really extravagant Christmas present. The Holy Grail of school supplies for the homeschooling mom - a photocopier. She was delighted. You have to understand that schooling six kids at home means a ton of copying. Assignment sheets, record sheets, activity sheets, etc. Homeschooling mothers either have their own machine, have a best friend who has a machine, or rent an extra room at a nearby Kinkos.

Yesterday, one of our more..... shall we say, inventive..... children decided to use the photocopier in a way that it had never been used before. In the past, there have been experiments. I've sometimes come home and found pictures of hands, feet, teeth, arms, toys, computer disks. Just about anything.

Yesterday, there were pictures of something else. I don't know if Rita discovered the boy genius (You had to know it wasn't Olivia) sitting on the copier actually making the copies or if she found the incriminating pages afterward. But yes, one of our boys got the ambitious and daring idea of seeing what it would look like if he took some photos of his bare bottom.

I laughed when Rita told me. She confessed that her reaction wasn't quite as jovial. We both agreed that it might not be a bad idea to post the copies on our front door to see what the lad's friends in the neighborhood thought of him putting his best face forward.

I just hope the copier was appropriately cleaned and sanitized.

I Must Have One

2007-03-15T08:23:00.000-04:00

Below is a link to what may be the most unusual contest that I've ever seen. Please do yourself a favor and check it out. I would be afraid of the consequences if I owned one of these. It drives Rita a little crazy when I do some light reading in the bathroom. (Hey, it's a lifelong habit. But now, with six kids, the restroom is sometimes the only place that I can spend a few minutes in peace and privacy.) If I owned this sucker, no one would ever see me.

Be sure to mouse over all the components to see exactly how complete this ensemble is. I absolutely love the megaphone on the floor. Even if I don't get the whole thing, I'm strongly considering just getting the megaphone.

http://rotorooter.com/john/

The Finish Line

2007-03-14T19:51:00.000-04:00

Finally, the news that we've been waiting for. This afternoon, Mom had her LAST radiation treatment. She is DONE!!!!!

She'll have plenty of follow up visits with the doctors. She may receive more Hercepton. And the clock on started counting down on the 5 years she has to go before she is officially considered a "Survivor of Breast Cancer." But this is the end of one hard season.

I wish to publicly acknowledge and thank our Father God for His steadfast love, support, and blessing during this difficult time. He definitely sustained all of us throughout. I also want to thank all of the loving friends and family who prayed for Mom, sent cards, called, and found other ways to make a difference. We love you and appreciate you more than you know.

The Penultimate Treatment

2007-03-13T09:51:00.000-04:00

Today is Mom's penultimate treatment for her breast cancer. (For anyone who doesn't know what a cool word like "penultimate" means, its definition is, "next to the last." There's no reason for me to use such an overbearing, complicated term except that it makes me feel smart.) There's a possibility that her oncologist may try the Hercepton again to see if the Congestive Heart Failure recurs, but this is truly the end of the radiation treatments.

Wow. It's been one wild, difficult ride. It is coming up on a year ago that Dad was hospitalized. Since then, we've had almost nothing but non-stop challenges in a lot of areas of life. I'm praying that this is the end of a very difficult season.

I saw Mom yesterday. Olivia and I went over to my parents house to check on some problems that Dad was having on his computer. (It turned out to be no problem, but we did manage to get his new printer installed and put some decent virus protection on the machine.) She's looking good. Looks like her hair is well into recovery, and while she's lost some weight during this ordeal, I think she looks amazingly good for a woman who is finishing up with chemo and radiation.

I can't wait until tomorrow is over!!!!!!!

One of the Seventy

2007-03-08T20:42:00.000-05:00

If you're familiar with my Blog, you know well that one of my major trials over the past few months has been the drastic reduction in salaried headcount that has been going on for the past several months at my employer, Ford Motor Company. This all started back in September, and it continued on until the end of February. At that point, everyone who opted to voluntarily leave the company had accepted their buyout and the rest of us waited to see if the number of people leaving had reached the stated goal of a 30% reduction. If it didn't firings (or "involuntary separations") would be necessary.

This week, our management held a flurry of mandatory cascade meetings to make some important announcements involving the company's Way Forward Plan. Mine was this afternoon at 4:15. The gist of the meeting was summed up in a brief, scripted statement read by the manager conducting the meeting -

As part of the Way Forward actions taken, it is the belief of management that IT has achieved its target of a 30% reduction in salaried headcount. At this time, it is anticipated that NO involuntary separations would be necessary at this time.

Translation: None of us sitting in that room were part of the 30%. Each of us was one of the 70.

The room broke into spontaneous applause.

It doesn't seem real. After all these weeks of living such a stressful situation, the release isn't there yet. I should be happy, and I think I will be happy. But my heart hasn't caught up to my mind yet, I guess.

I want to thank everyone who took the time to encourage me and pray for me during these past few months. Your support means more to me than I can express in these few words on a blog. It's wonderful to have such loving friends and family.

I also want to thank my Lord, who stood by me, giving me peace and strength throughout. Thank you, God, for taking such good care of me.

Winding Down on the Whole Cancer Thing

2007-03-08T12:53:00.000-05:00

Last night, I brought my dog over to visit Mom. Yes, she wanted to have a visit with her furry, four footed grandchild. She was a little concerned that dear old Walker wouldn't remember her since she hasn't been to the house in so long. Well, the visit went great, other than the fact that the dog was a bit over-excited to be at Mom's house. But she and Dad both liked having him there.

While we were visiting, Mom told me that there are only 5 radiation treatments left, and then she is all done!!! Wow, it's been a long road, but we are definitely in the home stretch. She does have a concern because the radiation is burning her, and she is experiencing some cracking and blistering at the site of the treatments. She's afraid that they will suspend the final few treatments until she can heal.

Yikes.

Let's hope that doesn't happen. Hopefully, in a week, Mom's life is going to take a definite turn for the better!!!!

My Daughter, The Dog

2007-03-06T09:57:00.000-05:00

Last Friday, Rita and I grudgingly allowed Olivia to audition for Ever After Productions' version of The Phantom Tollbooth. This is one of two "studio shows" that are presented each year. They are performed in one of the studios in the Village Theater instead of the main auditorium. The audiences are smaller and the setting is more intimate. We were hesitant because Liv has already been cast in EAP's big Spring musical, Disney's Beauty and the Beast. We did not like the idea of grappling with the difficult task of rehearsing two shows at once.

However, she really, really wanted to do it. She's been disappointed with the results of her last two auditions. After being given one of the lead parts in Peter Pan, she's been relegated to the chorus for both Aladdin and Beauty and the Beast. She did a great job in Aladdin, and I'm sure she'll do equally fine as a talking spoon or plate in the upcoming Beauty and the Beast. (We don't know yet which enchanted object she'll end up being.) But there's no denying that she's felt a huge letdown at not continuing to score lead roles.

Yesterday, the cast list for Phantom Tollbooth was announced via e-mail. Our girl is back on top. The lead character, Milo, will be played by one of the young men who auditioned. And his faithful companion during his fantasy journey through the Tollbooth will be Tock the Dog, as played by Olivia Butler. It was a real thrill to see her name at the very top of the cast list. It's a huge part, and last evening when I pulled up the e-mail to share the good news with her, she could barely contain her glee. She tried to hold back her enormous grin, and her face actually turned red with delight. When we last spoke of the show last evening, she was already heavily into planning her costume.

I've already made several jokes about the fact that she's a total dog. After laughing along with me for a while, she finally just rolled her eyes and said, "Dad, that is really getting old."

The Second Birthday Boy

2007-03-05T10:13:00.000-05:00

Saturday evening, we concluded our birthday celebrations for March. It was a fairly reserved day. We started in the morning with the planned visit to Golden Corral. As expected, Dad did a superb job of overeating. I started with a mountainous omlette and hash browns. This was followed up by a plate of french toast and waffles. Ugh. Very delicious and very filling.

Since we had already been to Zap Zone on Friday for Chris' birthday, we didn't have any fun activities planned for during the day. (Indeed, as I've already written, Saturday was a bit of a solemn day.) That evening we had the usual cake, ice cream, and presents.

Here's the birthday boy in all his glory -

All Right, Let's Settle This Once and For All

2007-03-04T22:32:00.000-05:00

The kids are watching this new documentary by James Cameron in which he and his team claim to have found the tomb, bones, and family of Jesus in Jerusalem. They are having a wonderful time pointing out all the flaws in the arguments and evidence being presented. It's such a ridiculous claim that I think they're having trouble keeping up with errors.

But let's just put this whole issue to rest, shall we?

Jesus is my Lord and King. He's also my friend. In fact, I talk to Him on a daily basis. Often, more than once. And if He ever married Mary Magdalene, had a bunch of kids, committed any sinful acts, died and left His bones behind, or for that matter, won the lotto.....

....HE'S NEVER MENTIONED IT TO ME!

He also never talked about it in His Word, the Bible.

So, case closed, as far as I'm concerned! He and I are close enough that I'm sure these issues would have come up.

Remembering Our Lost Little One

2007-03-03T18:57:00.000-05:00

This afternoon has been something of a grim time for us. Rita and I left the kids to go up to church to attend a memorial service for a young man. He was a tortured soul with many problems who passed on far before his time. We're happy that his suffering is over, and he is in the presence of his Lord. However, it was a sad occasion as he was remembered by loving friends and a father who is right now living the worst nightmare that anyone possibly can - burying a child.

After leaving the church, we stopped by a local flower shop and bought a single white rose. The girl who waited on us was very concerned about our purchase. She fretted that it wasn't a fresh rose. That it had started to die. She was also very concerned about the cold affecting it, and she tried to wrap it appropriately to protect it from the weather. We were very nonchalant about the whole thing.

After all, we were heading to the cemetery to leave the rose on our son's grave.

Seven years ago today, our son, Jonathan, passed away on the day of his birth. He lived nine hours, and in the end, his little lungs just couldn't take in enough oxygen to keep his little body going. The doctors tried to keep him going, pushing the vent up to the highest level and forcing the needed air in. However, the pressure of the vent kept his heart from working correctly. It was a Catch-22, and Jonathan lost his battle for life.

We arrived at the cemetery in a snow storm. Since we had just come from the church, we were wearing dress shoes. Completely insufficient for trudging around in ankle deep drifts. But, this didn't bother us much. We made it to the grave site. The first thing I noticed that in the last seven years, the marker was starting to get a bit dingy. Rita unwrapped the rose and arranged it so that the stem was buried in the ground and the flower was laying on the marker. After standing over Jonathan for a few moments, I walked around to some of the surrounding graves that had been recently tended. Some of them were children who had died in the late 50's and early 60's.

The death of a child is a deep wound that never really heals.

We only stayed a few minutes. It was enough. We sometimes question ourselves - Are we making too much of this? Other parents bury children whom they've known, loved, raised. Jonathan was in our lives for nine hours. We didn't really get to know him. When we think of him, we don't have memories. We had dreams. And those dreams are what we grieve.

Making too much of it? No way. God provides the love that parents have their children. It doesn't matter how young or how old the child is. When that love gets interrupted by an untimely death, it results in lifelong pain.

After the memorial service, I was talking about Jonathan with a friend. I told him that since his death, my favorite prayer is, "Jesus, please kiss and hug Jonathan for me right now. Please tell him that I love him and miss him." My friend smiled and told me that I could at least be happy that Jonathan has excellent child care until I'm with him again.

Amen!

Terminated

2007-03-02T19:40:00.000-05:00

The funniest line I read all week about James Cameron's attempt to blaspheme my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ (Funny how these things always get publicized around Easter time):

The church should send a robot back into the past to kill James Cameron's mother before he was born.

No, not a very loving sentiment. But it's only a joke, and it did make me laugh out loud.

(For any who don't get the joke, Cameron was the genius behind the Terminator movies. His lies about Jesus Christ are reported here.)

Birthday Bonanza

2007-03-02T11:29:00.001-05:00

Today is a welcome day off of work for me. On the schedule are birthdays for two of my sons - Nathanael and Christopher. Than's was yesterday, and Christopher will be celebrating tomorrow.

We kicked off this three day celebration yesterday with cake and ice cream for Than as well as the traditional gift openings. Normally, I always take a child's birthday off as a vacation day. The normal birthday begins with breakfast out with Dad a local diner and a special day with a family activity of the birthday child's choice. This time out, it's a little different. Christopher and Nathanael put their heads together and decided that they wanted Mom and me to spring for an afternoon of laser tag. Since this is a bit of a pricey choice, they agreed to combine their birthday celebrations into one event. I agreed to treat the whole family to an afternoon of gaming at Zap Zone. We decided that today would be the day for that event, so I decided to work on Than's actual birthday and take today off instead.

This morning, my fine 9-year-old and I ate oatmeal and toast at the corner restaurant down the street from us, Mema's Munchies. (Look, I'm trying to eat sensibly because I'm an old guy whose trying to stay healthy and keep the weight off. I have no idea what his excuse is for ordering like that.) Right now, we're loafing around the house, generally relaxing, playing computer games, watching TV, and enjoying some really nice downtime. This afternoon, at about 2:00 PM, the Butler clan is going to head up to Canton's Zap Zone, strap on laser vests, and try to kill each other with guns.

The family that slays together, stays together.

Tomorrow is Christopher's turn for the royal treatment. He has asked to have his B-Day breakfast at Golden Corral, on of our local all-you-eat joints. (So much for my eating sensibly. The menu will be made to order omelettes, french toast, pancakes, waffles. Ugh. And that's all on my plate. Hey, you have to really shovel it in at one of these places. I have an MBA, and I can tell you that the more you eat, the lower your fixed cost per forkful.) Later that evening, I may have digested enough to fit in cake and ice cream. And of course, Chris will tear into his gifts.

Not by coincidence, tomorrow will also be something of a somber day. I think I'll wait until then to write about it.

Below is a picture of last night's birthday boy!!!!

The Day After

2007-03-01T13:53:00.000-05:00

Welcome to the new Ford Motor Company.

I wasn't prepared for how different it was going to be.

At about 5:45 AM, I walked into the Ford Fitness Center in Dearborn. There were about half as many people as there normally are. I couldn't believe it. To check myself, I asked the lady behind the desk, Lori, if the place seemed empty to her. Oh yeah. She told me that numbers were down drastically since yesterday.

"Welcome to the Way Forward," I said as I walked towards the locker room.

Although my office didn't seem quite as abandoned, it did feel a lot more lonely than it did yesterday, when I said good-bye to several colleagues, some of whom I've been friends with for years. The first thing I noticed when I approached my cubicle was the two huge stack of file folders that were on my desk. They were left there after I had departed for the day by a departing co-worker whose job I'm going to be doing from now on. (How I'm going to do this, I have no idea.)

Attendance is sparse today, and empty offices are everywhere. Right now, I'm visiting another building for a meeting. The same lack of people is evident here, and the atmosphere of loneliness is enhanced by the fact that not all the lights in the building are on. Obviously, fewer people allow you to dial down the lighting in order to save money. The guy that I'm meeting with commented that it's like a Friday, with people taking time off and the work activity really slowing down.

Earlier this morning, I noted on the front page of the Detroit Free Press that our CEO has scored an additional $1 million in stock options. I don't begrudge him his amazing salary and bonuses. If we want a good leader, we need to pay him. But man - what a day to make this announcement to the media!

This Is The End

2007-02-28T10:21:00.000-05:00

About 5 months ago, we were told that this day was coming. There has been a lot of stress since then. Many ups and downs. And for some of us, we've been promised an additional two months of uncertainty before we can truly look around and see who has survived the purge.

But for many of my colleagues at Ford Motor Company, this is the end.

Today is the day when almost 30% of my co-workers will "separate" from the company.

The mood around here is very peculiar. Some people are delighted to be leaving, anxious to move onto new careers and opportunities. Some people are excited about entering retirement. Others who are leaving are facing it with regret and a bit of anxiety. I spoke at length with one of my co-workers this morning who is retiring after 3o years. She didn't want to do it but didn't feel that she had a choice. She's worried about what's next. She'd like to travel a bit, but she's alone and doesn't want to go anywhere without companionship. Tomorrow, she starts giving her house an overdue cleaning. Eventually, she intends to find some other work.

(Yup, it's pretty weird around here. As I'm typing this, the cubical next to mine suddenly blasted out the infamous polka music that typically accompanies the famous "Chicken Dance" at weddings and parties. I have no idea what that's about. I think I'm in the Twilight Zone.)

For the rest of us, we're still wondering if we're going to have jobs. My understanding of the situation: my area of the company came close to meeting the 30% requirement, missing the goal by just a few people. That being the case, the decision may be made to pursue "involuntary separations." With so few employees to target, there's some peace that the odds are strongly against any one of us being fired. But, you just never know. It sounds like it's going to be the end of April before we ultimately, finally know if our jobs are secure. For me personally, I got some unconfirmed information from a reliable source who shall not be named that my area should be good and my head should not be on the chopping block. (Suddenly, this is like spying for the CIA.) No guarantees in this crazy world, but it sounds promising.

Tomorrow's going to be really interesting. No one's really sure who's going to show up for work and who's going to be doing what jobs. My workload has already been changing drastically towards the extremely busy side of the spectrum. I've picked up some tasks that really don't have much to do with my job in light of some people who are leaving. Come the morrow, 30% of us suddenly aren't going to be here. And no one's really sure who the 30% is. Should be interesting.

And very unsettling.

Update on Mom

2007-02-26T14:25:00.000-05:00

I saw Mom briefly yesterday afternoon. She and Dad weren't able to make it church, so she asked me to bring her this week's version of our congregation's list of prayer needs.

She is doing okay, but the radiation treatments are starting to take their toll. She says that the site of the treatments is starting to become irritated and red. I believe that she's felling a bit wiped out from the daily radiation infusions as well.

She's doing okay and still intends to drive herself to the clinic everyday. However, we're starting to consider that she may have to do to the ladies of the church for transportation assistance before this is over.

She has doctor appointments later this week, so I'm hoping we'll hear more about the Congestive Heart Failure sometime in the next couple of days.

Prayers, as always, are appreciated.

The Worst Father in the World

2007-02-23T08:24:00.000-05:00

I sometimes wonder who the worst father in the world is. In some empirical sense, there must be one. There has to be someone who is such a mean, cruel idiot that he has no consideration of the well-being of his kids, thinking only of himself. If you look long enough and hard enough, eventually you would have to find someone who qualifies as the least skilled, least sensitive, least loving man towards his children.

Now, I've never seen him, and I have no idea who he is. That is, I HAD no idea who he is until he showed up at my parent's house the other night for their Homeschool Unit End Celebration. I'd like to say that he's truly my evil twin who knocked me out, tied me up, and took my place for the evening. But I can't. It was all me.

I came home from work on Wednesday a bit preoccupied but excited about the prospect of seeing my children reveal their staggering reservoirs of knowledge that had accumulated over the previous weeks. However, I do recall being slightly anxious about the length of the evening. This celebration was going to cover 18 weeks of school. That's a lot of fancy book larnin'. My anxiety blossomed into outright irritation when I saw the pile of costumes, school books, art projects, term papers, etc. that would have to be moved over to the parents' house for the evening's festivities. Ugh. My mood was getting worse by the second. In addition, for some inexplicable reason, I started to feel really tired and desperate for sleep.

We made it over there, and the evening began. The kids shared the books they had read, maps they had drawn, and showed off their craft projects. Two skits were performed. It was while all of this was going on that I encountered the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. Isaac and Philip, perhaps due to the stress of having to recite in front of others their understanding of Ancient Greece, the Mayans, Confucious, and the culture of Israel during Bible times, lapsed into a mood of absolute silliness and lost it with a bunch of distracting gags, laughs, and cutting up. I was furious. I took Isaac aside and snapped at him mercilessly. I rolled my eyes at Philip and snapped at him to "CUT IT OUT!"

My foul mood went over the edge.

Rita kept on a brave front, but by the time we managed to roll into the driveway back home, I had begun to realize the magnitude of my evil ways. As she (quite rightly) pointed out, I had totally failed to give the kids any positive reinforcement for their excellent work during the school year to date. Further, what I had completely missed was that this was her big night. Her time of validation when she was going to show off her star pupils and the amazing feats they had accomplished during the very challenging previous months.

All she got from her husband was a bunch of eye rolling, snapping, bad temper, impatience, and NO AFFIRMATION. When we got home, she made sure that I understood the message that I had sent loud and clear - I didn't value any of the hard work she had done since September.

And she was right. Despite the fact that I think she's the best homeschooling Mom in the world, that was the message that I had sent loud and clear.

What a moron.

As a Christian Dad, I should never allow my moods to dictate my behavior. It's called self-control, and it should be something that I practice on a daily basis. No matter how I feel at any given moment, I should be able to provide my family with love and support, especially during such an important occasion as this one was.

Ugh.

Well, fortunately, there is forgiveness. Rita was justifiably hurt, but she's a very loving and forgiving lady. Things are already moving back towards normal, but it's been a long time since I messed up THIS bad. If my relationship with my wife was a bank account, it would definitely be overdrawn right now. Looks like I'm going to be spending my time for a while making some regular deposits to get the balance back up where it needs to be.

But then, as a husband, that's what I should be doing all the time anyway!

Prayer Request

2007-02-22T08:28:00.000-05:00

This morning at 9:00 AM EST, my friend, Lori, is facing the latest hurdle in her ongoing struggle. Although I can't share any details, I can tell you that Lori is a wonderful Christian lady who has three beautiful children and who is facing a very difficult situation.

With all my heart, I sincerely request that any followers of Jesus Christ who are reading this blog to stop what they are doing for as long as they feel lead and offer up fervent prayers for Lori this morning. Also, please continue to keep her in your prayers. I will continue to request more specific times of prayer on my site as the need arises.

Thanks and God bless you.

Locker Room Weirdness

2007-02-21T18:05:00.000-05:00

Been a couple of weird days in the Ford Fitness Center locker room. For those of you who aren't in the know, I get up everyday around 5:00 AM, throw on my clothes and head into Dearborn for some exercise at the Ford Fitness Center. I then get cleaned up and head right to the office.

I've been doing this for a few years now, and yesterday was a first. After my shower, I found that someone had stolen my towel.

I was stunned.

That had never happened to me before. I stood there dripping with no obvious way to dry off. Other guys who were just getting in into the shower or finishing up looked at me with embarrassment and sympathy. One guy even said, "Hey, I didn't take it." Like I accused him or something.

Grumbling and still not willing to believe what had happened to me, I walked to the sinks, grabbed a few handfuls of paper towel, and dried off as best I could. I took a little satisfaction in that, while I'm sure he didn't realize it, I had had the last laugh on my thief. I usually use my towels for a couple of days before changing them out for a new, clean one. And the stolen towel had been used the day before.

EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW!

That'll teach ya, ya locker room weasel.

Likewise, today had a less dramatic but more surreal moment. I was standing in the shower contemplating a sad situation in my life right now and, I admit, feeling a bit down about it. Without warning, the guy in the next shower stall started loudly singing "Over The Rainbow".

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

Very strange.

(File this post under "Locker Room Humor.")

Update on Mom

2007-02-20T10:13:00.000-05:00

Mom has resumed her radiation treatments. Things seem to be going very well for her, but she continues to struggle with extreme lack of energy. I have no update on how the Congestive Heart Failure is continuing to afflict her. We should hear over the next couple of days on whether or not that condition is reversing itself in light of the fact that she is no longer receiving hercepton.

Some things are returning to normal. Tomorrow evening, our entire family and one of Olivia's friends are going over to Mom and Dad's house for an "End of Unit Celebration." The curriculum we're using with the kids divides the school year up into 4 units. At the end of each unit, the kids have a celebration in which they demonstrate all the wonderful knowledge that they gained over the previous weeks. So, tomorrow, Mom and Dad are going to be exposed to more Ancient Egyptian history, art projects, term papers, etc. etc. etc. than they ever thought possible.

Another good sign - Mom is asking me to bring the dog over for a visit. She's missing her only four legged grandchild.

Today's Mom Bulletin

2007-02-16T15:35:00.000-05:00

According to my Dad, Mom is resting comfortably at home. It looks like there is smooth sailing ahead, at least in terms of the Congestive Heart Failure. It looks like she's on the mend.

I'll post something about her next week after she's (I pray) more recovered and back on her radiation treatment.

Thanks for the prayers, everyone. I ask you to keep them coming! Still lots more radiation treatments ahead.

Another praise report - Things went very well for my friend, Lori, during her big day yesterday. I thank everyone who interceeded on her behalf.

Today's Update on Mom

2007-02-15T15:23:00.000-05:00

Well, according to Mom, this is good news, even though my heart skipped a few beats when she told me about it.

Mom has been diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure. As she suspected, this condition has been brought on by the hercepton infusions. The good news is that if she doesn't receive anymore infusions and takes it easy for a week or so, the condition should reverse itself. The only thing that's troubling is that the hercepton was completely effective at stopping the type of cancer that Mom had. We're naturally concerned about the possibility of the cancer coming back without it.

So, bed rest for a few days. Taking it easy. And starting Monday, radiation treatments resume.

Before I hung up with her, Mom commented that this turned out to be just a "blip on the radar." Thank God.

And thanks to everyone who prayed with us!!!

More Prayer Cover, Please

2007-02-15T08:37:00.000-05:00

This morning at 11:00 AM EST, my dear friend and sister in Christ, Lori, will be facing a challenging situation. Everything is expected to go well, but I would appreciate it if the saints of God would join in prayer and ask Him to bless the situation.

Also, I'll be providing an update on Mom later this afternoon as soon as I know how things are going.

Thanks, and God bless everyone!

Daddy Daughter Dancing

2007-02-15T07:46:00.000-05:00

Last night, Olivia and I attended the annual Daddy Daughter Dance at the Wayne Recreation Center. I was surprised that they would have it right on Valentine's Day, forcing the Dads to choose between their daughters and their wives. However, because I am married to the coolest lady in the world and Rita and I have never made a big stink about Valentine's Day anyway, there were no worries.

The dance was sold out, meaning that there were 115 girls and almost that many Dads in attendance. It was very nice. Right after we showed up, we got our picture snapped. (I have to keep reminding myself that the camera adds at least 20 pounds to you in every picture. It used to be only 10 pounds, but as I've gotten older, it seems that the amount added keeps going up. Funny how that works.) Then we went inside for an hour and a half of square dancing, the bunny hop, and that classic favorite, the chicken dance. Two intermissions were offered during the night, and the volunteers plied us with Sprite and sugar cookies to send our energy levels soaring.

Here's a picture of my lovely date for the evening:

Update on Mom's Condition

2007-02-14T20:46:00.000-05:00

I talked to Mom this afternoon after getting home from work. The only thing that she can tell me for sure is that a) she was given every test that she could conceive of a human body being subjected to and b) the doctor was able to confirm that she does indeed have a heart abnormality. The cause of the condition is unknown, although she seems fairly certain that it was caused by the hercepton infusions. Her heart is definitely not working hard enough to supply her body with the blood that it needs.

Tonight, she's on medication that is designed to stimulate her heart into working harder. At 1:30 PM tomorrow, she will be meeting with her oncologist to discuss her condition further and to decide (I hope) on a course of action from here on out.

Saints of God, please continue to pray for this situation. May the Lord hear and favor the prayers of His people.

2007-02-14T11:51:00.000-05:00

Urgent Call to Prayer

I would ask everyone reading these words to lift my Mom up in prayer this afternoon at 1:30 PM EST. She has had a change in her health status that could be very serious.

About a half hour ago, I talked to her on the phone. She's informed me that all follow up treatments for her cancer (radiation and hercepton infusions) have ceased immediately. Apparently, hercepton causes side effects very rarely. Unfortunately, Mom is one of those rare exceptions. Among the side effects she has experienced has been heart trouble. Apparently, the drug has inhibited the functioning of her heart, resulting in insufficient blood being pumped. She's been having dizzy spells, and with the her family history of heart problems, she's very concerned that this could be on the onset of serious cardiac problems.

This afternoon at 1:30 PM, she's visiting her new cardiologist for the first time. Please pray that this is nothing more than the latest, irritating bump in the road. Well, what the heck. While you're on your knees, please ask the Lord to heal all side effects and allow Mom to resume her treatments!

Thanks, and God bless you.

2007-02-07T07:57:00.000-05:00

Word Verification Activated

As of this morning, I've activated word verification for all comments to this blog. That means that if you wish to leave me a comment, you must now go through one of those slightly annoying "Enter the Word You See in the Above Picture" deals before your comment will appear on the site.

I'm doing this because I'm sick of having to delete all of the spam everytime I post something. Granted, I'm sure that all of the spammers, with their offers of free gifts and incredible deals on medications that promise all natural male enhancement, are only being kind and looking out for my best interests. But at the risk of sounding like a grumpy gus......

...enough's enough.

2007-02-06T15:14:00.000-05:00

The Big Chill

"Dad," asked Philip. "Why doesn't the furnace break in the summer?"

"Because," I answered. "God made it that way. He made it so that furnaces would break in the winter and air conditioners would break in the summer."

Yesterday morning, we were a couple of days into an intense arctic cold spell. I thought I saw on the news that some areas of Michigan had gotten to 45 below zero. I'm sure that in our area, we were in the neighborhood of 10 below. Really bitter, bitter cold. I got up at my usual time, about 5:00 AM. The house was cold, as you would expect. The furnace was running, and Rita managed to wake up long enough to ask if the heat was turned up or if the house was so cold that the furnace was just trying to keep us heated to the point that I dial down to at night.

"The heat's not up yet," I answered. "It's cold enough to click on the heat even when it's dialed down."

I went downstairs, started the car, got all my stuff ready, and went for my coffee.

No sugar in the sugar bowl.

So, I went downstairs to our pantry to refill it. While down there, I noted that the furnace sounded... funny. But I couldn't deal with that now.

Going back upstairs, I put down the sugar and went to check the thermostat. FIFTY-EIGHT DEGREES????

But... but... but...

It's set to 60 degrees. It couldn't go below 60! I ran back downstairs and checked the furnace. It was still running, but it was stone cold. I opened up the panels and looked inside. Like any man who has no idea what he's doing, I desperately tried to fake the furnace out. I wiggled wires. I found a switch that I turned on and off a few times.

Nothing.

As a last resort, I did what every man does when confronted by a situation that scares him, confuses him, and frustrates him - I went and woke up my wife.

Rita came downstairs and watched while I wiggled and switched again. Still nothing. I made the decision that strikes fear into the heart of any consumer of heating and cooling services - I had to call the repairman.

From the upstairs bedroom, I heard my wallet scream.

While I looked up the phone number for the only heating and cooling company that we use, Rita decided to move all the junk that had accumulated around the furnace so that the fix it guy could get to the machine without climbing over a mountain of stuff. But once she started, she couldn't stop. By the time I came back down, she had cleaned the entire basement. (That's not a joke. She really did.)

Family Heating and Cooling has no emergency service and doesn't publish their service hours. Just on the outside chance that someone was in the office, I called. That was at about 6:00 AM. Nothing. So, Rita and I went into the family room and turned on the TV. We watched the dregs of early morning television, including The Life of Olivia Newton-John on E!'s True Hollywood Story.

And we waited.

We didn't go back up to bed in part, I think, because we were afraid if we fell asleep now, we'd freeze to death. Things continued to go from bad to worse. I called into work and told my boss I would be late. I turned on the fireplace before remembering that gas logs without a blower throw off about as much heat as a paper match. After several attempts, I finally got the dog to lay on my ice cold feet. Then I realized that I had to go to the bathroom, so I kicked him off me again. Kids started trickling downstairs, only to scurry under a blanket when told of our calamity. Pretty soon, the room was filled with a mob of children who were hoping against hope that our lack of heat would mean no school. Maybe it was the boredom and the cold, but my mind began to obsess about issues of mortality. Would we freeze to death only to be found days later when we failed to show up at Sunday morning service? Or would we lapse into suspended animation, only to be revived hundreds of years in the future, trapped in a mad futuristic world we had never made????

I finally got through to Family H & C, and I immediately played the kid card.

"I need help. My furnace broke during the night. I've got six children here, and we're freezing." I didn't finish that sentence with "to death," but I'm sure those words were heavily implied. An appointment was set up for later in the morning. Staying wrapped in our blankets, we shuffled to the kitchen for breakfast.

While we were eating, Rita and I hatched a plan that would allow for homeschool to continue. (The kids were delighted!) She would take them all up to our church, while the dog and I would wait for the repairman.

This would work.

Later, the Family Heating and Cooling truck pulled in while the family van was just pulling out. Out popped this huge, beefy kid who looked about as old as my 15-year-old. Ten minutes and $150 later, the furnance was humming away and pumping out glorious heat.

Bad igniter.

Sweet.

The troops stayed up at the church for most of the day to give the house time to warm up. The dog resumed his full time job of laying on the floor and licking himself. I got showered (brrrrrrrrrr) and headed into work.

And all was right with the world once again. (Except for my wallet.)

2007-02-06T11:47:00.000-05:00

Prayer Request

I would ask anyone reading this blog to lift up in prayer Lori and her children. They are in a bad place right now and very much need the favor and blessings of God.

On their behalf, I thank you.

2007-02-04T14:19:00.000-05:00

My First Rule of Blogging

As you may have noticed, the previous item I posted has been edited to remove references to a situation that some friends of mine are going through in their personal life. Although I specifically said that it was not my story to tell, I felt that I was at liberty to discuss it. That was my first mistake. My second mistake was revealing personal information about the people involved, including their names.

After church this morning, I was approached by fellow member whom I respect and admire greatly. He informed me, in love, that he was surprised that I have been "so revealing" about what our friends are going through. We discussed the issue for a while, and I am so very grateful that I attend a church with brothers and sisters who can be honest with each other.

While driving home, I realized how right he was. I shared what I had written with Rita, who hadn't read it yet. She agreed completely with the gentleman who talked to me after service. I immediately signed onto my blog and removed the personal information that I had posted.

In hindsight, I see that what I had done was wrong. And I feel terrible about it.

So, that leads me to my first official law of blogging. I originally said in the offending post that I was commenting on the situation, even though it wasn't my story to tell. That was wrong. Here is Tim Butler's First Official Rule of Blogging -

IF IT'S NOT MY STORY TO TELL, DON'T TELL IT.

2007-02-01T14:14:00.000-05:00

Trials of the Century

Sorry for the sounds of silence lately. The last week or two have been an emotional rollercoaster and a flurry of activities that have preoccupied me. Among the issues that have distracted me have been:

1) Olivia went through tech week and performances in Ever After Productions' version of Disney's Aladdin. She was a member of a couple of choruses in the show, and she did her usual great job. Rita and I took turns volunteering backstage during rehearsals and performances, and we also attended the Saturday evening performance. It was a wonderful show and very well received by the audience. All the kids did well, and special kudos go to Ramon Razo, who played Genie. He was genuinely amusing, and a lot of his ad libs were laugh out loud funny. He gets special congratulations for carrying off the part in the shadow of Robin Williams, a tough act to follow.

I regret that I wasn't in the audience or backstage for the performance when Aladdin and Jasmine fell off of the magic carpet during "A Whole New World." I understand that they had to run to catch it and then had to jump back on.

2) For the first time since December, I had a rough week in terms of my future at Ford. Although I've been feeling a great peace about my positon at the company, some anxiety and fear crept back in a few days ago. I'm happy to report that peace has been restored, and some recent developments in this area have been very encouraging. More on this in a later post.

3) Removed for privacy considerations.

2007-01-18T23:07:00.000-05:00

An Amazing Discovery on Olivia's Birthday

Today, the Butler's celebrated Liv's 13th birthday. Her special day is actually on Saturday, but since we don't like crowds and I'm always on the look out for an excuse to take a vacation day, we moved it to today.

We started with the typical - breakfast with Dad at the little cafe down the street from our house. I was a good boy, ordering oatmeal, dry whole wheat toast, and milk. Liv plunged into an order of french toast, which I fully expected to be able to help her finish. (You couldn't expect me to be satisfied with oatmeal, right?) Unfortunately, she finished all of her food without a scrap for me. Man, this girl has suddenly started eating like a teenager.

Wait.....

Anyway, Liv chose to spend her birthday at COSI, the wonderful science museum in Toledo. We had a great time, and everyone was happy with their visit. Home again for dinner (pork chops), homemade ice cream cake, and presents. A great ending to our day.

What did we learn at COSI, mecca of scientific education? Plenty. For one thing, I learned that the PCs in the Water Works section are not locked down, and it's possible to take a monitor that's intended to educate young visitors about the dangers of global warming (what a waste of computing power) and the threatened extinction of some beautiful animals and use it to check the Drudge Report. What a triumph for science!

But most importantly, I learned that Tim Butler is one seriously good looking man.

Sort of.

You see, in one part of the museum, there was this special camera that took pictures of your face. It had three monitors on its console - one that showed the unaltered picture taken by the camera, one that showed a composite picture of what you would look like if your whole face was composed of the left half of your face, and a composite picture of what you would look like if both sides were the same as the right side of your face. Nobody's face is perfectly symmetrical, and this camera showed you what you would look like if it were from both the right and left perspectives.

I was absolutely amazed by the results.

The picture that was built exclusively from the left side of my face was..... incredibly good looking. I couldn't believe it. We're talking George Clooney good looking. We're talking sexiest man alive. It was truly shocking.

The right-sided face was.... not shocking or good looking. When I looked at him, I was sort of staring at a big, dopey broad shouldered guy who frankly seemed a little challenged. He looked like the kind of guy who likes to pass the time crushing beer cans against his forehead while watching Lions football. Like a big, stupid, spud man. Not very sophisticated, while his counterpart looked dashing, worldly, and sophisticated. He was a guy who would order a martini (shaken not stirred) while he was on his way to kill the human spud in the next picture.

Butler. Left-Faced Butler.

Now, the real shocker - I don't know why this is, but when I looked at spud man, I could see..... ME. Granted, it wasn't a perfect match, but I could definitely recognize myself there. No doubt about it. Spud man was Tim Butler. The other guy I would not have recognized at all if I come face to face with him on the street. There didn't seem anything about him that suggested a resemblance to the man whose face he was based on.

I can't explain this. I would have thought that both faces, while being different, would have been close to how I look. But that was clearly not the reality. I can only guess that since I'm right handed, maybe the right side of my face is dominant??? That's weird, but I can't think of another reason.

You know, I've never been extremely vain, but I do find myself wondering,"God, couldn't you have made me a lefty?"

2007-01-16T20:54:00.000-05:00

Dark

Over the long weekend (I had Monday off of work for Martin Luther King Jr. Day), we lived under the dire prediction that Michigan was about to be inundated with the worst kind of winter weather. Rain that would freeze on the roads and may driving a life threatening activity. Later in the day on Sunday, the rain was due to turn into snow and bury us under about 2 inches of the stuff. Yuck.

However, it seemed that little of that mess actually materialized. Yes, we got the rain, and while the temperatures plunged enough to coat all the trees in ice (which was beautiful), the roads remained largely wet and not very slippery. By Monday, snow started to fall, but not enough to be of any concern.

I began my holiday by sleeping in. Until 10:00 AM, to be precise. That's something I hadn't done since I was a teenager. I finally rolled out of bed only because my dog, Walker, insisted on leaning over the bed and licking my face. (He's taller than the bed, so this was no problem for him.) I got up, ate a leisurely breakfast, and started a day of puttering around the house doing a lot of small chores.

Until around 4:00 PM.

I was on the computer doing something or other. Suddenly, the screen in front of me died. So did the lights in Homeschool Room. (Otherwise known as the Dining Room that had long ago been inundated with textbooks and school projects. At this particular time, it was the home of a large paper mache bull with some acrobatic guy on its back. The kids had just completed it a bit earlier and it was in the process of drying.) Local power outages are not unusual in the Butler house. Because of the "unusual" electrical wiring that we enjoy, one can black out portions of our home by using the microwave for over 30 seconds without turning off every other light on the circuit.

However, this is not what happened yesterday. Everything in the house was off. The lights flickered on briefly three times, and then all went dark until 10:30 PM.

At first, we were optimistic. The weather wasn't that bad. My theory was that the DTE Energy guys were in the neighborhood trying to repair something, and for their own safety (and my inconvenience), they had shut off the power until the job was done. This was an idea that I shared with two of my neighbors later when the three of us met in the middle of the street to discuss the situation. (Three men who know nothing about the situation offering their "expert" opinions.) Because my idea offered the hope that the blackout would end soon, it was embraced as the absolute truth.

Confident that the power would soon come back, we retreated to our houses.

It had started to get dark, so I broke out the candles, and Rita was well into fixing dinner.

Now, for the kids, this was a huge party. They love blackouts. They didn't care that the heat was off, and the temperature in the house had noticably taken a dive. They didn't care that Rita had just gone to the store two days before and had spent hundreds of dollars on groceries that could spoil if the power stayed off too long. This was darkness, and candles, and fun!

To me, this was a nuisance, and a pain, and not much fun at all. I started to become grouchy. My bad attitude was made worse by their wild enjoyment of the blackout. Suddenly, I realized that monsters in the dark may be a very real danger and that I might be the thing that's going bump in the night. I paced around the house, looking at the darkened neighborhood out of different windows. I could see flashlight beams dancing on the windows in the houses with children, and I knew that in each of them, there was a foul tempered Dad grousing about wasting the batteries and making a lot of noise. (Just like our house.)

Most of us ate dinner together. (Philip and Isaac were at Young Marines and would eat later.) Everything was going fine until Rita asked, "Honey, can I still go out with Michele tonight?"

I groaned. I had forgotten completely that my dear wife had an appointment for coffee with Mrs. Pastor Philip. My jaw muscles clinched at the idea of managing a powerless house. Of keeping control of six kids without the benefit of electricity. Of facing the cold, dark, lonely night of Butler House without the company and assistance of my helpmeet.

Somewhere, deep in my brain, a response formed and headed towards my mouth -

"Mind? Why should I mind? I can't imagine anything easier than trying to keep track of 6 highly excited children and one dog in a cold place where I can't see a thing while you drink coffee and eat bon bons with your friend in some warm, lighted, comfortable restaurant somewhere. I mean, I really love it. Take your time. Feel free to stay out all night."

I told you I was a bit testy. Fortunately, my Husband Survival Instinct, honed by nearly 20 years of marriage, took over, intercepted the message before it could be uttered, and edited it down to this less inflamatory response -

"Of course not, dear. Have a good time."

That was close.

So we hunkered down. I got the little kids to bed, and they fell asleep fast enough. Nathanael and I played Parcheesi outside their room so I could be sure that there were no scary moments and the candle on their dresser wasn't going to be played with. Isaac and Philip came home from Young Marines, and while they ate a late supper, Nathanael turned in. Liv eventually showed up, and while my three eldest had fun, I sat in the living room listening to old time radio and Thru The Bible on my Pocket PC. Eventually, all the children were in bed, and I had the house to myself. I spent some time playing with the dog in front of the fire, and I had just begun wondering if I should start moving food from the refrigerator to the garage or should I go downstairs and haul up the cold weather sleeping bags when God answered my prayers.

The lights came back on.

Wonderful. I turned on the heat and started resetting the clocks. Suddenly, I realized that all the children who I had previously put to bed were running around the upstairs screaming about the power coming back. They had immediately gotten into a competition around blowing out all the candles in the house.

Sigh.

The lights were on. The kids were up. All was sorta right with the world.

Two Pictures I Saw Online Yesterday That Made Me Laugh

2007-01-12T14:12:00.000-05:00

2007-01-11T08:46:00.000-05:00

Update on Mom

It's been quite a while since I posted anything about my Mom's struggle with cancer. That's probably mainly because it's been going fairly well. No news is good news, right? That's not to say that there haven't been struggles. (She had her last chemo about a month ago, I believe. It was the worst round she received in the months since her surgery last summer. I spoke to her yesterday, and she's still feeling the effects.) But for the most part, things have progressed as we expected them to without set backs or disappointments.

Ah, if only I could end this update right here.

But I can't.

Mom's original treatment plan called for several infusions of chemotherapy, which she completed at the in late November/early December, as I already stated. (Wish I could nail that down more precisely, but I'm just not remembering the timeline that well right now.) After that, her doctor told her that he would give her a break to get past the holidays and rest up prior to beginning the seven weeks of radiation treatment. We were delighted that we would celebrate the holidays with Mom feeling reasonably well.

The news got better. A couple of weeks ago, Mom told me that she had been told by one of her doctors that the radiation follow up was optional. She could take it or leave it. It was up to her. Mom decided that she had had enough. She was going to refuse the radiation infusions, which were supposed to be administered Monday through Friday for the entire seven week course. We brushed aside any concerns about whether or not refusing the radiation was a wise decision. At least for me, it didn't really enter my head. I was just so happy that the ordeal was over. Granted there were still upcoming hurdles. Mom had decided at some point to have a mastectomy on the other side to help prevent a recurrance of the cancer. That surgery would have to be faced eventually. She still had 52 weeks of infusions of an anti-cancer druge to overcome, but these would be delivered intravenously once a week and cause side effects only in rare cases. And of course, the countdown clock is running on her five years. If she can stay cancer free for five years, she earns the label of "Survivor."

None of that matter, at least not to me. For now, we had dodged a bullet, and I could stop worrying about Mom receiving these terrible treatments that make her so sick.

A couple of days ago, we talked again on the phone. The doctor in charge of her case had overruled the doctor who told her the radiation was optional. We were back to facing seven weeks of radiation, five times a week. The first treatment is scheduled for tomorrow. The doctor has assured us that the radiation will not burn her. The skin around the site may be come pink and a little irritated, but that's all. (The only other person I've known who received radiation treatments for breast cancer was a man who was horribly burned by the procedure. His chest was burned black by the treatments, and the pain was incredibly intense.) However, I'm sure that the radiation will sap her strength. She may end up laying in bed or in her recliner, feeling like a limp dish towel. She'll drive herself on Friday, but how long will it be before she's not up to taking herself? Will we be able to find enough people to drive her to the clinic every day for several weeks? (It's about a half hour each way.)

Like the chemo, we won't know what's what until the treatments begin and we see how she handles them.

I really wish we could have dodged this bullet.

Lord, please walk beside Mom and the rest of our family through this. You have been so faithful throughout the chemo. It was difficult, but we didn't come up against anything that was insurmountable. Please stay with us through this, and bless Mom. Let her handle the radiation treatments with few, if any, side effects.

We give you the glory for everything, Father.

Amen.

2007-01-09T22:06:00.000-05:00

Christmas Moments

This is the third time I've started writing this entry. Let's see if I make it through without something crashing this time.

Obviously, events and activities prevented me from continuing with my blog throughout the Christmas season. No excuse except to say that when you've got six kids, stuff like this does happen.

So, I'm just going to cover a two or three really special (in my mind) that went on this past Christmas, and close the book on it until next year.

Christmas Day was great. Really a nice time. Memorable gifts included the Shooter Bots that I bought for Than and Philip on a whim early in the year. Philip was jumping up and down yelling with excitement when he opened his. Isaac received a very nice iPod from Grandma and Grandpa, and it has quickly become his new best friend. For myself, I was completely happy with my haul. Probably my most memorable gift was the complete Star Trek Original Series on DVD from my parents. (For anyone who doesn't know, I am a complete geek when it comes to Trek.) Also, my very good friend, Mr. Brooks Carlson, gave me a used copy of William Shatner's latest album, Has Been, that he picked up at a library used book sale. The music is so mind-numbingly awful that it is wonderful. Really funny stuff. Lest I forget, my darling wife came through with an item that I've needed for a while - a new car stereo. My old one croaked last summer, and we've never had the cash to replace it. But that was my one and only gift from Rita this time around, and I love it. The best part - it has an auxilary jack in the front where you can plug an iPod, MP3 player or some other music machine in and play the content over the car speakers. I use this feature daily with my Pocket PC and the MP3s of old time radio shows (Jack Benny, the Shadow, Gunsmoke, etc.) that I love so much.

I think that, without a doubt, my most memorable moments came with my trip up to Mom's and Dad's house at Higgins Lake between Christmas and New Years. We'd had some company at the house in November (another family who my Mom had loaned the house to), and I'd promised my parents that I would take a trip up to ensure that everything was buttoned down for the winter. I took my three oldest boys with me. It was really nice. We got up to the house on the first day after dark, and after unpacking the car, we headed out to the nearest Wendy's on nearby Houghton Lake. We had the joint to ourselves, and I gave the boys pretty much free reign to order what they wanted. Frosties all around for dessert. By the time we finished up, a few other people had started to trickle in, so we went back home. While I cleaned up some rough areas of the house and did some straightening, the boys hunkered down in their sleeping bags and turned on some DVDs that I had checked out from the library just for this occasion - Season 1 of Buck Rogers in the 25th Century. (Note: This was a show that I loved as a teen back in the early 80's. I watched it first run, and after going on to college, watched it every night after dinner in reruns with a group of my friends. We'd eat at the dining hall and then go up to John Anderluh's room and watch his old black and white TV set with the screen the size of a postage stamp. We had a blast laughing at the campiness and thrilling to Buck's latest adventure. Flash forward to Higgins Lake. I was appalled at how very seriously bad this show was. I mean, it was horrible. It hasn't held up at all. Very dated. The boys enjoyed it well enough, but I was completely turned off and couldn't help regretting the many hours I had wasted watching this tripe. Here's the best measure of how truly bad it was - one episode featured a very young, pre-fame Jamie Lee Curtis as an inmate in some desert planet prison who Buck has to rescue for some reason. Jamie spends a lot of the episode running around in a fairly form fitting tank top because.... I guess it was the prison uniform. This gratuitous display had no interest whatsoever for me. Was it because I'm 43, married, and shouldn't be interested in such things? NO. It's because that's how bad the show was. Wow. A real stinker.) The next day, I finished the work, and we headed home, stopping at Big Boy in West Branch for brunch. All in all, we were gone a little more than 24 hours, but just the chance to get away with the boys was a blast.

New Years Eve was great fun. We hosted Pastor Philip, Michelle, and Austin. There was lots of eating, talking, and laughing for all. Because Pastor Philip starts to fade out super early (like around 8:00 AM), the Harris beat a retreat well ahead of the ball dropping at midnight. The younger children went to bed shortly after they left, and the rest of us played games until the countdown to midnight.

Regrets this past Christmas? Oh yeah. If I had it to do over, I wouldn't have allowed the Ford situation to cost me a week of the Advent season. My discouragement over my buyout offer and the resulting depression saw me moping around the house for several days. As a result, we lost a lot of time and didn't do some of the activities which I usually champion. (Like going to the Wayne County Lightfest and watching all of the classic TV Christmas Specials. No Grinch this year. YIKES!)

But next year's coming soon. Only 349 shopping days until Christmas. And I've already started.

I kid you not.

2006-12-21T10:55:00.000-05:00

A Little Christmas Ritual

There's a little something that I do everyday during the Christmas season, and this year, it's become very important to me. I roll out of bed around 5:30 AM during the week, and I'm out the door before 6:00, heading for the fitness center. The last thing I do before I leave the house is I light the Christmas tree and get the Christmas carol CDs playing on the stereo. All other lights in the downstairs are out. The only illumination comes from the soft, colored lights of the tree and my village display across the fireplace mantle.

The reason I do this is because when the kids stagger downstairs and spend a few minutes dozing on the couch before they start their day, I want the first thing they see to be the tree in all its glory. I want them to hear the Christmas carols. I've done this for a while, but I didn't think it mattered until Phil told me at the beginning of Advent that one of his favorite things to do is to get up early and look at my Christmas village. He likes to imagine the lives of the people who live there as they come alive in his mind and go about their holiday affairs.

It blesses me, too, I have to admit. As I'm ready to leave the house, I take a few seconds and enjoy the atmosphere of the family room. It's like an idyllic Christmas. A Christmas fantasy. The tree, beautiful with it's gorgeous array of lights. The village, lit up on the bookshelf and across the mantle. The fireplace with all of our stockings hung up and waiting for Christmas Eve. Everyday, I'm tempted to just take off my coat, grab a nice, hot cup of coffee, and step into that room. Forget about work. Just cross that threshold and drink in the Christmas ambience. Enjoy the peace and quiet and lose myself in such a joyful place.

But, I have to go to work. As I'm leaving, I promise myself that someday soon when I don't have to go to the office, I'm going to get out of bed early and spend some quality time in the family room.

Right about the time that I step out the back door and get hit by the brisk morning air, reality grabs hold of me. There's no stinkin' way I'm getting up at 5:30 AM on my day off when I can sleep in under my nice, warm covers. Am I nuts or something?

Oh well, it's a nice fantasy.

2006-12-19T09:19:00.000-05:00

The Return of Christmas

A little over one week since Ford asked me to take a lot of money in exchange for getting out of Dodge, and I am doing fine. Actually, better than fine. I am feeling incredibly blessed.

To be sure, last week was terrible. I went through so many emotional ups and downs. One minute, I was overwhelmed by the opportunities that might come my way if I took the buyout offer and switched jobs. Maybe even start an entirely new career. The next minute, I was down in the dumps and trying to fight off depression as I thought of the future without the stability of working at a large company (WHAT STABILITY?????), maybe not being able to find a job that paid enough to support my family, and the possibility of transitioning home to being a fulltime homeschooling dad while my wife went back into nursing to be the provider for the family.

At those moments, I felt like shedding a few tears. (And sometimes did.) One particular moment that almost drove me to the edge was when I came home from work and was greeted by Aidan's smiling, loving face. As looked at my beautiful boy, I thought about how much he depended on me and how terrible it would be to come home and tell Rita and the kids that I had been fired.

Last week, I didn't know how I would be able to get through Christmas, let alone to the end of February.

But the grace of God and some good solid prayer has turned so many things around. I realized how much I was NOT trusting God. Sure, I could still lose my job. That could happen at anytime. But He is my provider, not the company I work for. And if I do lose my job, landing me another one is nothing compared to the work He did on the cross to secure my salvation. What's the greater miracle - getting me saved or getting me a job? Then why am I not trusting Him? If I end up as a house husband, is that a greater sacrifice than Christ made for me? Then why am I afraid to make that sacrifice for my family? I'm called to lay down my life for them, so trading my job for fulltime work at home raising the kids sounds like a pretty good deal to me compared to the alternative. What message am I giving God when I fret about my kids and my ability to provide for them? Aren't I saying, "God, I love these kids more than You do because I would never leave them without provision and You would"?

What a tiny, pathetic thing my faith is. He's done so much for me and continues to do so much everyday, and yet I worry that He will one day decide to forget about me and forsake me.

Believe me, any prayers sent my way are sooooooo appreciated. I know that there are any number of areas where I could be tested in the coming weeks that would threaten to beat me down. But for now, I am resting in Him, and He is giving me incredible peace.

Last week, I couldn't see myself making it through Christmas with anything but depression and discouragement. Now, I say - BRING IT ON! I am pumped for an awesome holiday celebration. Far from being a dreary downer, I'm hoping that this will be the greatest Christmas I've ever had!

2006-12-14T10:57:00.000-05:00

Finally - The Follow Up

I've tried to post on this a couple of times, but for some reason my stuff isn't going through. I don't know why, and I don't have archived copies of what I said.

In the interests of rehashing something that's been on my mind for days now, I'll keep it brief -

I did get a buyout offer. As expected.

I was "strongly encouraged" to take the offer. (Not just to "consider" taking it.)

It was very upsetting. It shook me up more than I thought it would.

I've spent my time since Monday fluxuating between brief periods of excitement over the fact that I could pocket a load of cash and find another job relatively quickly in some other, more exciting place and somewhat longer periods of upset, depression, and (let's face it) fear over what this will mean to my life, career, and family.

These feelings continued with little interruption until right after work yesterday, when I was suddenly the recipient of that "peace that passeth all understanding." To be sure, I'm still quaking a bit, but God is over all things. He'll take care of this, too.

I think I know what I'm going to do, but I have 45 days from Monday to make it final. PLEASE pray for me that I would be wise. Prayers for a turnaround at Ford would be appreciated, too!

2006-12-11T11:24:00.000-05:00

We Don't Want You Here - We'll Pay You to Leave

Today's the day that I've known about and suffered no small amount of anxiety regarding for months. At 1:15 PM EST, I have a 15 minute meeting with the manager of my department to receive my buyout offer. Basically, I'll be given a heap of money to cut my career short, walk out the door, and forget about Ford Motor Company.

If I don't take this offer and the company decides that more employees have to go, I may be facing "involuntary separation." Gee, that sounds like some kind of sports injury or something. What it really means is that I could be fired.

To add to the stress of the day, I'll be sitting with my immediate supervisor at 2:00 PM to receive my performance review for the year. I don't know anyone who enjoys a PR, but I absolutely hate them. Because I never feel like I do a good job, I always expect to be blasted in my review. (I've never actually been raked over the coals in one of these things.)

So today, I am not a happy guy.

I know that God is over all things. I know I can trust Him in all things. I just wish He'd push the fast forward button and move me ahead about six months so I'd know what to do and how it's all going to turn out.

2006-12-08T10:18:00.000-05:00

Advent Night

Wednesday night was the second of our weekly Family Advent Nights. This tradition is something that was first introduced to me about 3 years ago by Todd Wilson, the Family Man. (You can view his web pages on Advent Nights at http://familymanweb.com/adventnight.htm.) Todd's ministry is awesome, and I recommend it to every Dad out there who wants to be encouraged in the struggle to raise kids and be a good father.

My preparations for Advent Nights begin prior to Thanksgiving - the baking of the snacks. In our house, it's always been cinnamon rolls. This dates back to the very first time we did Advent Nights. We had just come home from my grandmother's funeral in the wilds of Northern Michigan, and we had brought back some samples of the local cuisine. Like everything else, everything in the upper pennisula is better than we have it here down in the land of the trolls. (Otherwise known as the "lower pennisula.") That includes the cinnamon rolls. Everyone who knows anything about the Keewinaw Bay knows that the greatest sweet rolls in creation are found at the Hilltop Restaurant in L'anse. They're huge - like a loaf of bread. For one person, they are breakfast by themselves. And there'd be plenty to take home. Not knowing that they would start something big, I brought a bunch of those treasures home. When I was looking for a treat to snack on for Advent Night, these were a natural choice. (Since that first year, I've opted for baking my own cinnamon rolls and freezing them before Thanksgiving. It would be nice touch to have rolls from the Hilltop, but shipping costs and the inevitable procrastination in ordering them every year made me decide to just make my own.)

The next thing needed for Advent Night is a wreath of some type. These can be as simple or as elaborate as you'd like. The first year I decided to do this, I found a very simple artificial wreath at a Catholic church supply store. However, after the holidays that year, I found this one at Christian Book Distributors:

http://www.christianbook.com/Christian/Books/product?item_no=11952&netp_id=310467&event=ESRCN&item_code=WW#curr

It is a beautiful piece, very affordable, and the included nativity scene allows us to add a little bit to the celebration. I pretty much follow Todd's plan for Bible readings, but I add figures to the scene to go along with that night's reading. For example, the first week, I added Mary and Joseph for the "Prophecy Candle," as Mary and Joseph both received words from God regarding the roles that they and Jesus would play in history. This week was the "Bethlehem Candle," so in addition to Mary and Joseph, the stable animals made an appearance.

So, here's how the night typically goes - We turn off all of the lights except for the Christmas Tree and my Village Display. We gather around the kitchen table where I've set up the wreath with the figures that have already been added from prior weeks. We have a word of prayer, and I light the number of candles for that week of Advent. Then while the new figures are added to the scene, (One of the kids usually places the figure in or around the wreath.) I explain what the significance of this week's candle is. The Bible reading comes next, and then we go around the table with everyone offering a prayer of petition or thanks to Almighty God. After that, Rita breaks out the cinnamon rolls while I read the Christmas story for that night. I read a story every night to the kids during the Advent season. There are a variety of books that could be used for reading alouds during this time of year. My favorite series is the Christmas in my Heart books, edited by Joe Wheeler. Most of the stories are faith based and all tell a message and a moral about what's really important during the holiday season.

And that's it. It's a lot of fun, pretty simple to do, and I know that the kids really look forward to it. (Christopher especially will ask me at any time of the year - "Is tonight an Advent Night?")

2006-12-06T16:04:00.000-05:00

Life's Unexpected Developments

Ah, unpredictability. Tis the spice of life.

Okay, maybe not the spice. Maybe it's more like a really important condiment. Maybe it's the sweet ketchup and the bright yellow mustard on a juicy, thick, half pound cheeseburger.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Cheeseburger....... (pant, pant, pant...)

Anyway, looks like life may be on the verge of dealing us one of those surprises. It's funny how when you think you've planned for everything and have it all under control, the Lord sometimes says, "No, that's not the way that it's going to be." Sound interesting? Well, I'm sorry to have to be so mysterious, but continue watching this page for further details. (For those of you who fancy yourselves as detective types, there is a subtle hint in the title of this post.)

Tonight, the kids are pumped. Why? It's our weekly Advent Night Celebration. What happens during Advent Night? Well, I'll have a full after-action report tomorrow. I'll say now that it's a blast, and every family should do something like it.

2006-12-04T12:12:00.000-05:00

T-Minus One Week and Counting

Last Wednesday as I was packing up to leave the office and head home, I got an unexpected meeting invitation for a one on one meeting with an upper level manager in my department. The meeting notice was marked "private." It is scheduled to last only 15 minutes.

It took less than 2 seconds for me to realize what this meeting is going to be about, even though no details about the meeting were provided in the invitation. A quick look at my co-worker's calendars confirmed that they too have brief meetings scheduled with the same manager on the same day. It looks like we're all going to be on the receiving end.

One week from today is going to be the day we receive our voluntary separation buy out offers from the company.

I'm not surprised in the least. We had been prepared by our leaders. We were told that because the company really wanted to avoid having to resort to involuntary separations (or "firings," as they are more popularly known), "the net" was going to be "cast wide." So, I figured that I was going to receive an offer.

That didn't take away from the impact, though. I felt like I had been sucker punched. I stared at my monitor and suddenly realized that I was breathing hard. My heart was pounding. Almost 18 years with Ford, and the company is going to offer me a lump sum to leave. That's not what I thought would happen when I was hired in on January 16, 1989.

Now, I just have to figure out what I'm going to do.

2006-12-04T11:41:00.000-05:00

Chemotherapy Liberation Day

Today, Mom receives her last round of chemo. Thank you, Lord, for your faithfulness and provision in bringing her this far. It's hard to believe that it was months ago that this journey started. Now, the end is in sight, although the road still has plenty of bumps ahead.

After today, Mom is going to have to go through the entire battery of tests that she endured when she was first diagnosed. This is a nuisance and a pain, but a necessary step to make sure that the cancer is gone.

After that, she's on to radiation treatments. Five times a week for seven weeks. I'm feeling pretty apprehensive about what that's going to do to her. Fortunately, I know that God will continue to provide. She'll be okay.

But as they say, getting there is half the fun.

We appreciate everyone's prayers.

2006-11-30T20:41:00.000-05:00

The Christmas Production

This was a day we have looked forward to with excitement and a little bit of apprehension. Today, I took the day off of work, and we headed to the Novi Christmas Show for the debut of Olivia's one act play called "The Christmas Production."

This journey began a couple of months ago when Liv spotted an advertisement for this holiday event in the Detroit newspaper. A footnote in the ad stated that the show's organizers were looking for talent to perform on stage during the weekend. Any interested parties could call the number included with the ad for consideration. Of course, Olivia was interested.

She and her friend, Nichole, wrote "The Christmas Production" together. When we called the women in charge of the Christmas Show, we were shocked that she asked very few questions. Olivia and Nichole would have the stage for one hour on November 30 to put on their play. So, they cast their friends in the roles. (There were about 15 roles in the show.) They came up with a schedule of rehearsals, climbed around in the attic at our church looking for props and costumes, and whipped the show into shape. In the end, it was...... pretty good. It came together and actually worked. And believe me, there were times when we had had our doubts that it would.

We arrived at noon, one hour before the scheduled performance. It was a rainy day, and much to my chagrin, the promised complimentary parking for guest performers was absolutely jam packed. So, I dropped everyone off, parked far away, and hiked in. The show itself was nice, but not exactly what I suspected. I thought it would be more "event" and less "vendors." Instead, the only entertainment or celebration that was evident was the stage where Liv's company was scheduled to perform, and that was a very small, informal affair tucked away in one corner of the complex. The rest of the very large convention space was taken up by row after row after row of vendors selling just about anything you would want. From unique indoor grills to full size arcade video games to playground structures to perfume to toys to gourmet cookies, someone was selling it. If anyone needed a symbol of the crass commercialism of Christmas, I couldn't think of a better one.

We got the lay of the land, broke out the props, and changed into costume. I sat with Christopher and Aidan while Rita helped Olivia get the kids organized and in their places. This was not going to be the ideal venue, but that was okay with me. It was a very informal arrangement, and the majority of the audience consisted of the parents of the kids performing. Some other families wandered in, and they seemed to be pretty interested in what the kids were doing. At 1:00 PM, the world debut of "The Christmas Production" kicked off at Rock Financial Showplace in Novi, Michigan.

The show lasted 7 minutes. It dealt with the angst of a young director (Olivia) trying to coax a performance of the story of the birth of Jesus from a company of young actors. They make it through the play with much difficulty, and Liv's character decides she's had enough. No one will ever know of the awesome miracle of Christmas if this group has anything to say about it. They won't take it serious. She has a fit and storms off the stage. Her distress convinces the young actors to take their play more seriously, and they vow to give it their all. The play ends with their singing, "Hark the Herald Angels Sing."

The kids did a good job despite the difficulty of the set up. The audio system was terrible. Tons of feedback, and it's tough to hear shy kids with noisy microphones. The hustle and bustle of the room was distracting, and there was constant Christmas music being played in the background that the actors had to compete with. But they did it. And they performed the play two more times before surrendering the stage.

Whew. We all were happy that it was over and that it had gone so well.

We spent the rest of the day shopping. It's wasn't a bad time, and we bought some interesting things. Rita brought me to a booth where a woman was selling jars of scented oils as aroma therapy. (I've long been interested in making our house smell nice. I'm constantly on the look out for stinky candles and such. Cinnamon is my favorite. Something about it reminds me of a nice, cozy kitchen.) The oils were very strong, and the lady had descriptions of all the benefits of the various scents. Some were good for clearing your sinuses. Others were effective for curing headaches. Almost all of the scents were listed as being aphrodisiacs. Hot dog. We ended up buying a big jar of vanilla scent for our bedroom. (The woman told us that she gets a lot of people asking her what "aphrodisiacs" are. She tells them that it means "losing weight." I added that it could have that effect if you do it often enough. Ha Ha. Middle age sex jokes. I love 'em.) I also got a little jar of cinnamon scent for my car. Very cool.

We scored some other good stuff, including a couple of gifts. My big prize was an excellent peanut butter cookie. Yummy. Love those cookies.

2006-11-29T16:20:00.000-05:00

Treed Off

At the Butler house, Christmas is in full swing. That's typical for me. I'm a guy who does Christmas year round. I listen to Christmas music over the summer months. I'm already looking forward to starting my Christmas 2007 shopping on December 26. My computer is filled with spreadsheets, databases, and checklists dedicated to the flawless execution of a perfect family holiday.

You have to know that it never works out that way, right?

Since Rita and I got married, our tradition has been to cut down our own tree at a little farm in Belleville. Although I'm pretty choosey, we always seemed to be able to find a very good speciman to plop down in the family room. Alas! Last year, we didn't receive our usual post card advertisement from Thornhollow Tree Farm. When we arrived in December 2005, we found that Thornhollow was closed and in the first stages of being turned into condominiums. (Thank the Lord. Christmas Tree Farms are on every street corner, but you really have to try hard to find a good condominium.) Searching around, we found another place near us, but the results were less than spectacular. The tree, which looked great at the farm, turned out to a hole infested nightmare. It truly was the ugliest tree we'd ever purchased. Worse, it wouldn't drink water and dried out to a hard, crisp, crusty twig before the season was over.

This year, I was determined to find a better place. I went directly to the Nathional Christmas Tree Growers Association website. (Which I have bookmarked in My Favorites. I kid you not.) I found a place just south of Metro Airport. We set out in the early afternoon eager to start a new family tradition. When we arrived, the farm didn't look like what I expected, but that was all right. The trees looked good, and I commented to Rita about how healthy and green they looked. We started walking towards the back of the farm, and about halfway through, we started getting a little concerned that nothing was jumping out at us. Then, we discovered WHY the trees looked so perfectly green - spray paint. Christmas trees by Sherwin Williams. We pressed on, knowing in our hearts that this place was a bust.

Not wanting to waste the rest of the day, we decided to give another chance to the place where we bought our tree last year. No dice. The tractor brought us to the same section of the farm where we cut our tree in 2005. We had our choice of the trees that were too ugly to get cut last year. Twelve months had not made them any more attractive. We left.

As soon as we were home, I fired up the computer and went looking for more tree farms. I finally settled on one that was pretty far away but offered a lot more than Christmas trees. A petting zoo, gift shoppe, food, entertainment, pony rides, etc. We decided to head out the next day. And we would come home WITH a tree.

We arrived at Matthes Evergreen Farm (http://www.matthesevergreenfarm.com/) and were instantly happy with our choice. The trees looked great. Wagons rode slowly through the farm picking up customers and their trees for delivery to the shaking and netting stations. People were friendly and seemed genuinely happy to see us. Even the weather was great. (No coats at the end of November.) It took us about an hour, but we found an excellent (or so we thought) tree. It was beautiful. Isaac insisted on cutting it down himself, and since my age has won out over my pride and desire to appear as young as I used to be, I let him. The first warning sign that we were heading for a tough evening came as Isaac got down on the ground and prepared to cut -

"Hey, this trunk is kind of crooked."

Be quiet, Isaac. We know what we're doing.

The tree came down, was loaded onto the back of a wagon, shaken, wrapped, and stowed in the back of the van. Mission accomplished. We stayed at the farm for another hour having fun. Aidan had his first pony ride and visited Santa.

We got home and rushed to put the tree into its stand so that it would be able to drink. Hmmmm. Won't quite fit. That's bizarre. The trunk was big, but not that big. We tried several times before we concluded that the trunk needed to be trimmed down. We chose a section to cut off, and Isaac went to work. Still, the tree wouldn't fit. We laid it down and saw the reason why. For about the top five feet of the tree, the trunk was perfectly straight. After that, it shot off at an almost 45 degree angle. Yikes.

Rita thought we could make it work, and I hoped she was right. I was fighting massive discouragement, watching my evening bleed away into hours of fighting this tree. We got the tree into the stand, tightened the screws, and checked it. It wouldn't even stand upright without me supporting it. I told the others that I refused to spend the Christmas season holding the tree up. Rita suggested that we get some books to level the tree. I knew this wouldn't work, but I hoped I was wrong. Several dictionaries, textbooks, and pieces of wood later, the tree was propped up and almost straight. But the one side of the stand was so far off the floor that the tree would instantly roll to one side or the other when I let go.

I gave up. I angrily told them that I would stop on my way home from work and get a pre-cut tree. Enough of this useless waste of time. Rita and Isaac wouldn't quit. They were having the time of their lives. I stormed out of the room and got back on the computer. I could hear them laughing at the pathetic tree they were trying to save while I looked for tree lots between my work and home.

After a while, Rita called me back to see the results of their labors.

They had done it.

I was shocked.

They had cut off the crooked part of the trunk, which made the tree far too short to be considered respectable. But it was in the stand and it was straight. Then, they had gotten a short play table from the basement, put a cloth over it, and put the tree on top of the table.

The result was a perfectly beautiful tree that almost reached the ceiling.

It looked great.

And the most important thing is not that they had salvaged a Christmas tree disaster. What was truly beautiful was that they had had a blast doing it. They had laughed together and created a Christmas memory that will probably be with them for the rest of their lives. And I had missed it. Because I had gotten discouraged and angry, I had walked away from what was an important family moment. As I looked at the tree, I really kicked myself for being such a fool. For letting my anger.....

Ah, forget it. I'm just happy I didn't have to buy another tree.

Last night, we finished decorating the tree and putting up my Christmas village. Everything looks great.

Christmas is here! At last!

(Check back often as I intend to dilligently blog throughout the holiday season.)

2006-11-01T14:50:00.000-05:00

Happy Birthday, Isaac

Yesterday, I took a welcome day off from work to spend the day with my eldest son, who turned 15. Hard to believe that it's just over 15 years ago that Rita and I went into the hospital for an induced labor that lasted about 8 hours, if my memory is on the ball.

And life was never the same after that.

Anyway, I got up around 7:00 AM. Since I wasn't going into the office, I had the opportunity to take my morning exercise with our dog, Walker. (He was absolutely thrilled!) After getting cleaned up and dressed, Isaac and I went for our traditional birthday breakfast at the Wayne Coney Island. (Every kid gets breakfast out with Dad on their special day.) I agonized over the menu and briefly thought about splurging for something really fattening before losing my nerve and falling back on my standard, less than exciting choice - oatmeal, milk, and a bagel. Isaac ordered the breakfast special, and almost had an unpleasant surprise when he asked for "hard-boiled" instead of "hard-yoked" eggs. Fortunately, I knew that hard-boiled eggs weren't his style and I caught the error.

Usually, the afternoon of a Butler child's birthday involves the entire family engaging in a activity of the birthday boy's/girl's choice. Depending on age, this usually means a trip to Chuck E. Cheese, Laser Tag, a local science museum, or some other dream getaway. However, since Isaac had already had his birthday treat (a trip to Cedar Point a couple of weeks previously), we settled down for a lazy afternoon at home.

Around 5:00 PM, we had cake and a rather anti-climatic opening of gifts. As Isaac is at the stage where toys no longer satisfy, I popped for a gift certificate for Buy.Com as a present for him. I had ordered it the previous day and asked that it be delivered to his e-mail Inbox. After cake and ice cream, I told Isaac to check his e-mail for his birthday present. He logged in and found -

Nothing!!!!

Happy birthday, ol' buddy!

I logged in at the Buy.Com web site, and my ordered was "being processed at the warehouse." I wonder just what processing an online gift certificate needs before it gets sent out.

Well, he took it in stride, and a few minutes later, we left for our church's annual Harvest Party at Real Life Farms in Canton. There, we roasted hot dogs around a camp fire, sipped hot chocolate, played with a barn full of animals (I took a real liking a calf named Barney. He reminded me of my dog as he was almost as big as Walker. I even got to feed him a bottle of milk.), went on a hay ride, and rode horses. Afterwards, we picked up our bags of candy, went home, and had a delightfully naughty candy eating session before hitting the sheets. We were so juiced by sugar that even I felt a little buzzed.

2006-10-17T15:22:00.000-04:00

The Return of the Return

All right!!!! I get the idea!

Sheesh!

Those of you who have been screaming about my lack of blogging activities lately can finally stop! I'm back, okay? So lay off of the e-mails! I'm serious.

Actually.......

not one person has written to me about not posting here. Not one. No one's complained. No one's asked how I'm doing. Traffic on my blog slowed to trickle. In fact, people who have known me years have started struggling to forget my name. I'm fading from the real world. I'm that guy in that one episode of the Twilight Zone who lost his identity and his own mother didn't know who he was.

Oh well.

Here's the latest news on my Mom - she's doing quite well. Her oncologist seems to have hit on a good combination of drugs that can control the symptoms of her chemotherapy. She's starting to get stronger, and she looks good. The only worry that I've got now is what's going to happen in about a month when the drugs in her chemo cocktail are changed. She's tolerated what's happening quite well compared to how others have fared. I'm really hoping that that continues.

Dad continues to struggle, and Mom continues to struggle with helping him. It's a bad situation all around. She's been handling pretty much everything for him. Rita and I have been called to do little. Mainly, provide a couple of meals a week. Mom's been doing everything else. That's a ton of work on top of recovering from breast cancer. I'm very concerned about where this is all going and how long what's going on now can be sustained.

Please keep praying everyone.

2006-09-21T10:15:00.000-04:00

Back Online and Catching Up

You've got to give me credit for making a go of it. I ALMOST made it through my entire vacation with an entry a day. But not quite. A couple of things ultimately led to my drop off. Of course, going on vacation with six kids is never peaceful and relaxing. I would have enjoyed spending my days lazing around the house reading and resting. That would have provided many opportunities to update my blog. But the kids needed things to keep them amused, and that kept Rita and me pretty busy.

Now that I'm back, I'll be writing here more often. I have some things left over from vacation that I want to blog about over the next few days. In the meantime, here's some quick catch up on the important stuff -

1) Vacation Wrap Up - After my last entry, things wound down appropriately. We did make a return visit to Mackinac (where I managed to foil an Al-Qaida plot - more on that later), ate more ice cream, and spent a fun albeit very expensive afternoon at Avalanche Bay water park at Boyne Mountain. We finished up with a delicious and very enjoyable dinner at Zehnder's in Frankenmuth. Another reason that I'll be able to blog every day next vacation is that it's only going to last one week. I made up my mind that with a big family, two weeks is just too long to be in northern Michigan. The first week is great, with lots of fun activities and closeknit family time. The second week is filled with complaints about missing friends and homesickness. We usually peter out about mid-week (which we did this year) and head home early.

2) Mom's Health - Please stay in prayer for Mom. I think she is doing very well with the chemo, but it is still discouraging how much it is taking out of her. Nausea is not a major problem, thank God. Exhaustion is. And we are very concerned about the progression of the effects that the chemo is having. After Round 1, she had about 3 shaky days, 3 really bad days, and two weeks of good days. After Round 2, she about 1.5 weeks of really bad days. She's just coming out of that now. The doctor says that her reaction to the chemo will continue to deteriorate over time, along with her overall condition. (Right now, the only thing that you'd notice about her is that she is bald. Other than that, she looks normal.) Also, my Dad is continuing to struggle with his own health issues.

The next 6 months are going to be very rough indeed.

3) The Way Ford-Ward - As most of you doubtless know, the condition of my employer, the Ford Motor Company, has deteriorated alarmingly over the past couple of years. The latest and to date the largest blow came last Friday when Mark Fields, president of The Americas division of Fords, announced the third version of the Way Forward Plan, which is designed to restore the company to prominence and profitability. The updated plan calls for the offering of buyouts to our entire hourly workforce and the elimination of 10,000 salaried positions by the end of the first quarter 2007. What does this mean to me? I have absolutely no idea at this point. My job is in danger. Everyone's is. Very few people around feel that there's no way they are are the chopping block. If I am going to be offered a buyout, I won't know about it until mid-December. If I'm going to be "involuntarily separated," I won't know about that until next year. I give the company a lot of credit for firing people as a last resort. But it is still very frustrating and stressful.

In the meantime, we're told to stay focused and put everything we have into our jobs. That's hard to do when morale is so low that you have to be careful not to step in it.

Vacation - Day 7

2006-09-08T23:14:00.000-04:00

It was inevitable. Today was our first real "down day." We were so tuckered out that we decided to have a day with nothing planned. Rita did take the kids for some swimming off of the public dock while I did some shopping in Prudenville. Other than that, we played games and watched TV.

Since things were so quiet, Rita decided to crash on some overdue haircuts for the kids. I finally twisted her arm and got her to so something that she's refused to do got a LONG time - give me a haircut. I've asked her time and again since she started cutting the kids' hair if she'd take over doing mine. I think she was pretty nervous about what I'd look like when she was done. However, we're in vacation, and that will give me a few days to recover if she really screws it up. But surprisingly, I turned out okay. Probably every bit as good as I do when someone from Fantastic Sam's cuts it for me. It took a long time, but that was mainly because Rita had no experience dealing with bald spots.

So, I looooook mahhhh-velous.

Well, kind of.

I mean, for me, I look pretty good.

All right. I'm the same old homely guy but with short hair. Just don't tell Rita. She loves all those makeover shows, and I think she's feeling kind of proud of the new me.

Vacation - Day 6

2006-09-07T23:34:00.000-04:00

Today, we did end up going to Mackinaw City. We got there in the early afternoon, so there wasn't enough time to do much.

We started out my climbing to the top is the Mackinaw City Lighthouse. That was really interesting and provided an outstanding view of the Straits and the Mackinac Bridge. However, our time spent at the top of the lighthouse was cut short then we spotted a lightning strike out over Lake Huron. For obvious reasons, we weren't allowed in the tower with bolts of lightning falling from the sky.

From there, we went to Historic Mill Creek to walk some of the most beautiful nature trails in the area. It was more stunning than we remembered it, but because it was so late in the day, we didn't have nearly enough time to explore as much as we wanted to before the park closed.

We spent the rest of the day shopping with dinner at Audie's and a stop at Marshall's for a heaping helping of fudge. We landed back at Higgins pretty late, but we've all but decided that another journey to the Straits would be a good thing.

Vacation - Day 5

2006-09-06T23:34:00.000-04:00

Today, we visited Call of the Wild, Michigan's greatest collection of ferocious, stuffed animals. The kids always enjoy this place. They love browsing through he gift shop, and the museum offers a freebie scavenger hunt with a prize for everyone who successfully completes it. (This time, it was a smiley face sticker. I mean, come on. At least give the kids something that's not a totally embarrassing piece of junk.) We all had a fun time.

I've always had a soft spot in my heart for this joint. It was always one of those places that I begged my parents to take me, but we never had time. We were always traveling through to someplace else. Finally, they did end up taking me. Man, I remember feeling so excited! This was going to be incredible! I couldn't wait to see all of those wild animals. I was a bit confused to see that the animals were all sorta dead. Oh well. I stayed the course. After all, this was Call of the freakin' Wild. The living, ferocious animals had to be later on in the tour. My anxiety began to rise as I continued through the museum and every creature I saw was completely lifeless. Finally, I hit the end of the tour, and another childhood dream came to a bitter end. I left wiser, finally understanding the meaning of "tourist trap." Since then, I've rechristened the place, "Call of the Mild". In the years since, I've overcome my bitterness enough to appreciate Call of the Wild for what it is.

Unfortunately, we had to cut today's visit short as Aidan needed some pull-up attention, and we had forgotten to bring along the diaper bag. So, we returned to the lake house for fresh pants, a steak dinner, and a visit to Nibbles for some ice cream.

Tomorrow, we're either taking a day trip to Mackinac or a visit to Traverse City and the nearby Sleeping Bear Sand Dunes.

Vacation - Day 4

2006-09-05T23:12:00.000-04:00

Today was pretty quiet, as far as I'm concerned. The kids said that they wanted to go canoing, and my bum shoulder pretty much eliminated me from participating. So, the four eldest children and my lovely wife opted for 1.5 miles of lazy river cruising while Christopher, Aidan, and I signed on for lunch at McDonald's and shopping at Wal-Mart for supplies. The rest of the day was pretty laid back as well. We all finally felt very tuckered out from several days of late bedtimes, early rising and keeping fairly busy.

No pictures today. Goodnight all.

Vacation - Day 3

2006-09-04T19:00:00.000-04:00

Every day that I'm at Higgins Lake, Walker and I get up before dawn and hike about three miles at nearby Marl Lake. There's a place on the trail that provides a great view of the sun coming up over Marl, so I try to time it so that we arrive right about the time the sun peeks up over trees across the water. It's usually a time of quiet and solitude that I enjoy immensely. This morning, however, we had a little change of program. Isaac decided that he wanted to join us.

We had a nice walk, and I pleased to report that the young man did have a little trouble at times keeping up with his old Dad. Also, I almost always see some animals while I'm hiking. Some days when I'm really blessed, I see some deer. But today, there was no danger of that. (Anyone who knows Isaac understands what a chatterbox he is.)

Later in the day, we played a game of Putt Putt Golf. If I hadn't been involved myself, I probably would have thought it was pretty funny. I was the official score keeper and small child assistant. Rita played and also tried to keep things in order. Things held together for about two holes. After what, the older kids decided to play through while the younger ones lagged behind. Suddenly, I had kids from all over the course screaming numbers at me. Finally, I just started making stuff up. I didn't have the heart to tell them at the end that their scores were almost completely fictious.

Later, we walked by Higgins Lake, where the kids waded and threw rocks, got ice cream, and finished the day with games of Parcheesi and Trivial Pursuit.

Fun stuff.

Vacation - Day 2

2006-09-03T23:02:00.000-04:00

So far, nothing too exciting. But things are about to take off.

Catching up on our little northern Michigan adventure - Friday evening, we kicked off our two week vacation visiting Miller's Bar in Dearborn for a meal of the greatest cheeseburgers on Earth. We were not disappointed. Delicious! Afterwards, we spent the evening packing.

Saturday morning found us at Golden Corral for our annual first breakfast of vacation. All you can eat goodness. Assorted commitments took us well into the afternoon. It was almost 3:00 PM before we got on the road. Considering the fact that we had to stop at practically every toilet between Wayne and Higgins Lake (Traveling with a potty training 3 year old is bliss.), we made pretty good time.

Today was pretty much an organization day. We went to church at Soul's Harbor Worship Center in Roscommon. We heard a very inspiring sermon on the importance of storing the Word of God in our hearts. A special treat was seeing the pastor's daughter again for the first time since she sold us our dog, Walker, two years ago. She was delighted to hear how Walker has prospered in our household. She still owns Walker's mother, Chelsea, and we were surprised to learn how many of Walker's behaviors apparently came directly from his mother. His emotional disposition, his clinginess, his intelligence, and even his unwillingness to eat in front of others seem to be strikingly similar to Chelsea. It was a real thrill to talk to her and compare notes.

Later, we made a grocery run and capped off the day by roasting hot dogs and brats over a campfire.

Here are some pictures from the day's festivities -